[nfbcs] How the internet started according to the Bible

Mike Freeman k7uij at panix.com
Sun Jul 21 04:53:10 UTC 2013


I love it!

-----Original Message-----
From: nfbcs [mailto:nfbcs-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of David Andrews
Sent: Saturday, July 20, 2013 7:45 PM
To: david.andrews at nfbnet.org
Subject: [nfbcs] How the internet started according to the Bible


>How the internet started according to the  Bible
>
>In ancient Israel , it came to pass that a trader by the name of  Abraham
>Com
>did take unto himself a healthy young wife by the name of  Dorothy.
>
>And Dot Com was a comely woman, Large of breast, broad of  shoulder
>and long of leg. Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot  Com.
>
>And she said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why dost thou travel so  far
>from... town to town with thy goods when thou canst trade  without ever
>leaving thy tent?"
>
>And Abraham did look at her as though  she were several saddle bags
>short of a camel load, but simply said, "How,  dear?"
>
>And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums  in
>between to send messages saying what you have for sale, and they  will
>reply telling you who hath the best price. The sale can be made  on
>the drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."
>
>Abraham  thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with
>the  drums.
>
>And the drums rang out and were an immediate success. Abraham sold  all
>the goods he had at the top price, without ever having to move from his
>tent.
>
>To prevent neighbouring countries from overhearing what the drums  were
>saying, Dot devised a system that only she and the drummers knew.  It
>was known as Must Send Drum Over Sound (MSDOS), and she also  developed
>a language to transmit ideas and pictures - Hebrew To The People  (HTTP).
>
>And the young men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the  greedy
>horsefly take to camel dung. They were called Nomadic  Ecclesiastical
>Rich Dominican Sybarites, or NERDS.
>
>And lo, the land  was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the
>deafening sound of drums  that no one noticed that the real riches were
>going to that enterprising drum  dealer, Brother William of Gates, who
>bought off every drum maker in the  land. Indeed he did insist on
>drums to be made that would work only with  Brother Gates' drumheads
>and drumsticks.
>
>And Dot did say, "Oh,  Abraham, what we have started is being taken
>over by others."
>
>And  Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel , or eBay as it came to be
>known.
>
>He said, "We need a name that reflects what we are."
>
>And  Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators."
>
>"YAHOO," said  Abraham.
>
>And because it was Dot's idea, they named it YAHOO Dot  Com.
>
>Abraham's cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious  Energetic
>Educated Kid (GEEK) that he was, soon started using Dot's drums  to
>locate things around the countryside.
>
>It soon became known as God's  Own Official Guide to Locating
>Everything (GOOGLE).
>
>That is how it all  began.


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