[Nfbf-l] God and the Dog!

[Beth]

LMAO!  That's so funny and so cute.  I've heard something like this.
Beth

On 1/18/09, Kirk Harmon <kvharmon54 at gmail.com> wrote:
> I just had to put this out there for our Dog Lovers and their mates! Kirk
>             FROM: THE DOG
>             Dear God:  Is it on purpose our names are the same, only
> reversed?
>
>             Dear God:  Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever,
> smell one another?
>
>             Dear God:  When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or
> is it still the same old story?
>
>             Dear God:  Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the
> cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not one
> named for a ddog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a
> nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the 'Chrysler Eagle' the 'Chrysler
> Beagle'?
>
>             Dear God:  If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no
> human hears him, is he still a bad dog?
>
>             Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand
> signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic
> energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?
>
>             Dear God:  More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.
>
>             Dear God:  Are there mailmen in heaven? If there are, will I
> have to apologize?
>
>
>
>             Dear God:  Let me give you a list of just some of the things I
> must remember to be a good dog.
>
>               1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after
> they throw it up.
>
>               2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just
> because I like the way they smell.
>
>               3. The litter box is not a cookie jar.
>
>               4. The sofa is not a face towel; neither are mom and dad's
> laps.
>
>               5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
>
>               6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's
> on the toilet.
>
>               7. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable
> way of saying hello.
>
>               8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under
> the coffee table .
>
>               9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering
> the house, not after.
>
>             10. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt
> across the carpet.
>
>             11. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my
> crotch when we have company.
>
>             12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and
> he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.
>
>             13. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for
> Mom's driver's license and registration.
>
>             14. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.
>
>
>
>             P.S.  Dear God: When I get to heaven may I have my testicles
> back?
>
>
>             'Until one has loved an animal, part of their soul remains
> unawakened.'
>
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> Smiles are nothing more than 30 second Vacations!
>
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