[Nfbf-l] {Disarmed} Re: [NFBF-Leaders] picking and choosingNFB policies and constitutional requirements

Fri May 2 14:50:36 UTC 2014

Darlene, I think we all miss what we don't no longer have. I can't see and I 
wish I could drive. To be able to go anywhare when you want is something I 
never could do. Yes, I can take busses or subway trains but it takes longer 
if you have to take moore than one bus or train. You should be so proud of 
what you are still doing for your self. You are doing what you have to do to 
servive like all of the rest of us are doing. Keep up the good work.
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Darlene Laibl-Crowe" <dlaiblcrowe at att.net>
To: "'NFB of Florida Internet Mailing List'" <nfbf-l at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Friday, May 02, 2014 9:25 AM
Subject: Re: [Nfbf-l] {Disarmed} Re: [NFBF-Leaders] picking and choosingNFB 
policies and constitutional requirements


> Well said, Toni.  Why do you think we shouldn't say 'I miss driving.'?  I
> know how you feel, I miss driving, too.  And I don't have a problem
> admitting it.  Losing certain activities, abilities; we all have to go
> through the grieving process, just like when we lose someone we love.
>
> And it is a process...not something that goes away overnight.  Slowly as 
> the
> years go by, it gets easier but it doesn't go away.  I dream that I am
> driving...in those dreams, I am so afraid the cops are going to catch me
> without my driver's license.  I can see clearly and know where I am going.
> One time, I dreamed I was driving a semi, I have never driven one in my 
> life
> but I was up above the road so high I could see for miles.  We don't lose
> the ability to drive, just because we lost our eyesight or progressively
> losing it.
>
> However, I do have to say this, I had the opportunity to continue driving
> when I was first diagnosed with Retinitis Pigmentosa but I chose not to
> continue to drive because I am a very cautious person.  I had a five year
> son to think about, I was a single mother, working full time...I had to 
> ask
> myself, would he be safe?  Would others on the road be safe?   Would I be
> safe if I continued to drive?  I didn't want to hurt anyone and I 
> certainly
> didn't want to hurt myself.  Continuing to drive while having vision loss 
> is
> dangerous.  I didn't want to have to face myself after I had 
> unintentionally
> hurt someone because I refused to give up driving.  I don't think I could
> have done that...if you have a vision problem, what happens if a child
> accidentally runs out into the street chasing a ball?  Would you be able 
> to
> see if if you have peripheral field loss?  Then there are those who have
> central vision loss or distorted vision and can only see a portion of the
> road, is it safe to drive when in that situation?  Common sense and logic
> would say 'no'; sometimes we have to let go in order to grow.
>
> That is my opinion.  And here is a thought, too,  I do have to admit that 
> if
> I had to choose being visual or being blind, I would choose visual.  This 
> is
> a visual world and it isn't easy to clearly understanding the visual
> information that is needed when you can't see it.  Plus having hearing
> problems on top of it, makes it even harder.  BUT, I choose to learn and 
> do
> all I can to help myself, advocate to find the right resources for my
> specific needs and I share with others so they can grow, too.
>
> It is okay to say 'I don't like it", It is okay to say 'I miss 
> driving'...,
> it is what you do about your situation  that counts.
>
> Stay strong and know that you are not alone!
> (smile)
> Darlene
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Nfbf-l [mailto:nfbf-l-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Toni King
> Sent: Friday, May 02, 2014 8:36 AM
> To: nfbf-l at nfbnet.org
> Subject: Re: [Nfbf-l] {Disarmed} Re: [NFBF-Leaders] picking and choosing 
> NFB
> policies and constitutional requirements
>
> Hi,
> Okay I am just catching this thread so only responding to Mr. Evans
> comments.
> I am assuming  it was said we should not say " I miss driving"
> I am a skilled well adjusted visually impaired person.  I do any thing I
> want to do and tell everyone there is nothing you can not do without 
> sight.
> That being said there are still times I miss driving mostly when I am some
> where and want to leave like NOW!
>
> I miss seeing my grandson's faces.  Now these moments are fewer  and only
> pop up now and then, but they do cross my mind from time to time.
> This does not mean I am not accepting my loss of sight, nor does it mean I
> am still trying to live in the sighted world.
>
> Do you not miss a love one or friend who has passed on?  If you answered 
> yes
> then why would it be so strange to state you miss something you could do
> when you had sight?
> We have lost a part of us so missing it from time to time is a normal and
> natural feeling.
>
> I have heard people say those who were born without sight can not miss 
> what
> they never had.  I am not sure I agree with that statement.  I know they 
> can
> grieve over not being able to drive, get their license when their friends
> did. Many times their not allowed to do what their friends or siblings are
> able to do.
> so instead of missing  doing something they experience a longing.
>
> The goal is to be well adjusted and to except  where we are and to learn 
> how
> to do anything we want sight or not.
>
> I am very pleased with my life and I have a full and active one.  My 
> moments
> of missing sight happen very very rarely now but to say this never happens
> or to not allow yourself  those brief moments is in my opinion not 
> healthy.
>
> Just my two cents worth.
> Toni
>
> --
> Check out my blog
> www.samobile.net/users/tkk/
>
> Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature.... Life is
> either a daring adventure or nothing.
>   Helen Keller, The Open Door (1957)
>
> Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.
> -Roger Caras
>
>
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