[Nfbf-l] Pet Peeves of the Blind and Visually Impaired

Wed May 7 16:47:28 UTC 2014

Haha!   Thanks for sharing!  I noticed the words 'over there' and 'Over
here'  are not on the list of Pet Peeves.  Now those are myine!  I also wear
hearing aids and many people assume those Hearing Aids help me to be 100%
hearing...directional hearing is not possible!!!  

Thanks for bringing a smile to my face!!
(smile)
Darlne

-----Original Message-----
From: Nfbf-l [mailto:nfbf-l-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Alan Dicey
Sent: Wednesday, May 07, 2014 12:00 PM
To: Undisclosed-Recipient: ;@smtp203.mail.ne1.yahoo.com
Subject: [Nfbf-l] Pet Peeves of the Blind and Visually Impaired

Dear Friends,
Some one sent me this and I just could not resist sending it along to my
sighted friends and posting it to some primarily Sighted List groups I am
on.
I am sharing it with you, so perhaps you might want to share it with them
also!
It might help a little, who knows!
With Best Regards,
God Bless,
Alan
Plantation, Florida

Pet Peeves of the Blind and Visually Impaired 1. The Guessing Game.
"Hey [insert name here]! Do you know who I am?" Oh, please don't do this. 
I've seen adults do this with students (a lot) and frankly, it's just rude. 
Don't put that person in a position to be embarrassed just in case they
don't remember. Yes, they will recognize familiar voices, and you may know
they recognize you, but please resist the temptation to prove it to others
by quizzing them. Don't you think you'd feel a little stressed if you
thought you'd be tested about people every time you went out? Be considerate
and identify yourself!

2. Being afraid of the "S" word.
Someone can be talking to a blind or partially sighted person and say
something like, "Let's go see what's for lunch." Then they gasp and think,
oh no, I shouldn't have said "see"! Lighten up. Everyone uses "see" and
"look" and "watch out!" Even the blind or visually impaired person.

3. I'm blind, not deaf.
HELLO, HOW ARE YOU?? Which goes along with one of my own pet peeves: "You
teach blind kids? So you must know sign language?" Um, NO. I know braille. I
wish I had a dime for every time someone asked me that - to include
administrators during an interview. Sometimes they "get it", but sometimes
they don't, but that's okay because I've just deducted 5 IQ points from
them. :) And, for the record, I have taken sign language classes, but since
I don't have any deaf-blind students, I have long forgotten it. I wonder if
teachers of the hearing impaired get asked if they know braille...

4. Blind people can hear everything.
The flip side of #3, people assume the visually impaired have so much better
hearing than the rest of us. No, but they do rely on it much more, so they
are probably listening and paying attention better. Not necessarily paying
attention to the teacher, though. They also don't have visual "distractors" 
so to speak, so they can focus more on what they hear. Unless they don't
want to hear it, of course. They are human, after all.

5. "I don't really believe he's blind, even with that white cane.
I'm not moving from this side of the hallway." That attitude will leave you
sprawled out on the floor when the person barrels into you. Here's a good
rule: Don't play chicken with a blind person. You will always lose. Instead,
get out of the way, or at least make yourself known by saying something or
making a noise.

6. Holding out your hand to shake theirs without touching their hand.
If that person cannot see your hand, how is he/she supposed to know where
your hand is? Answer: They will often extend their hand in anticipation, but
if not, tell them you would like to shake their hand and then reach out and
take their hand. Same thing goes for handing them something. You would be
amazed how many times this happens. "Here's your homework," and then you
hold it out in space. Or, even better, don't say anything at all and hold it
out. Again, exactly how is he/she going to know where it is? Grope about for
it? Sometimes groping is okay, like for finding a dropped item. But when
handing things to the visually impaired, please touch their hand with it so
they know where it is.
Fear factor
Pin It
Being pulled along when you can't see will definitely pump up the anxiety
level and possibly increase scarring!

7. Low expectations.
This includes: the "pity" person (Oh, you poor blind child. You must have a
terrible life.), the "know-it-all" (Dr. so-and-so can work miracles. I know
because my grandmother/nephew/dog has 20-20 now.), "Mr. Helper" (Let me do
that, I know it's too hard for you.), the "excuse-maker" (I don't want
him/her to learn how to make a [insert food here] because they might
cut/burn/make a mess. You can't go on that field trip because there might be
a terrorist attack and I would worry.), the "denial/embarrassed person" 
(Don't use your cane at the store so people won't know you're blind.), and
unfortunately, the list goes on and on. Low expectation is probably the
worst thing one person can do to another, regardless of abilities. If you
aim for low performance, that's likely what you'll get. Don't be an enabler.

Being too over-protective will dramatically hinder their progress toward
independence and living a happy, social, productive life. Step back. Allow
them to fail, get a minor injury, and make their own mistakes. That's how we
all learn. Don't forbid them these opportunities.

8. Would you like to feel my face?
Whoa. Do you ask sighted people if they'd like to feel your face? First of
all, a blind person is not going to get a lot of information from feeling a
face, other than maybe the shape of your nose. There are times when it is
appropriate, such as when learning parts of the body. But if you are not
immediate family, allowing a blind or partially sighted person to "feel" you
is very inappropriate. And there are some who will attempt to do just that
because they know many people aren't sure about that protocol. Their hand
needs to stay in a handshake, and not move up your arm, and certainly
nowhere else! If you wouldn't let a sighted person feel you, don't let a
blind one. I've answered this question a lot from sighted people who have
felt awkward allowing this to happen. Well, they feel awkward for a reason! 
It's not socially acceptable! Feeling your hair, or the lack of it, can be
appropriate depending on the circumstances. I've also had this question from
a parent: How will my son know what a particular girl looks like? Answer: 
His friends will tell him!!! Oh yes, they will. ;)

9. Rudeness.
It's usually just ignorance, but don't assume that any blind or visually
impaired person automatically needs help. Grabbing the person's arm and
pulling them along is wrong on several levels. We know you're probably just
trying to be nice, but don't. First, always ask the person if they would
like some assistance. Then, use the sighted guide technique correctly. Offer
your arm and let them hold it, usually right above the elbow. Also, if there
are several others with the person, speak directly to him/her, not through
an "interpreter", as if the person is not there. Say his name, so he knows
you are talking to him.

10. Pure meanness.
Placing obstacles in the blind or visually impaired person's path, throwing
things at them, rearranging furniture, moving or taking their belongings,
calling them names, taking them to the wrong place and leaving them. Yes, it
is mean - and it happens all too often. There will always be Sith among us,
but educating ourselves and our children about disabilities may help reduce
the bias, discrimination and ignorance.
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