[Nfbf-l] Stress Relief Workshop review

[Merry Schoch]

Hello Federation Family,

 

As promised to those attending the Stress Relief workshop I have pasted
below a review and other resources for your use. Chapter presidents if you
will let your members who do not have internet/email access,  I am happy to
print and mail.  I am also willing to record and send the recording to their
smart phone. Please have them contact me at 813 625 1850. I want to be able
to provide to all interested. 

 

Stress and Anxiety

 

In the United States stress and anxiety are the top reasons people seek
therapeutic support.

 

Stress and Anxiety as defined by www.dictionary.com

Stress  is a response by the body to a stimulus, as fear or pain, that
disturbs or interferes with the normal physiological equilibrium of an
organism. 

Anxiety is  distress or uneasiness of mind caused by fear/danger/ misfortune

 

Stress and anxiety are not necessarily a negative. For example, an
individual may be more motivated to study for an exam, practice a speech,
and/or give more attention to a task to perform well. When stress and
anxiety inhibits you from living your life to your full potential, you may
want to consider seeking help. Learning tools and techniques to help you
manage and lower the symptoms will benefit your mind, body, and spirit.

 

Tools &  Techniques:

 

The below handout can be found at psychologytools.org

 

How Breathing Affects Feelings 

The way we breathe is strongly linked to the way we feel. When we are
relaxed 

we breathe slowly, and when we are anxious we breathe more quickly. 

 

Normal breathing 

When we breathe we take in oxygen (O2) that is used by the body. This
process creates carbon 

dioxide (CO2), a waste product that we breathe out. When our breathing is
relaxed the levels of 

oxygen and carbon dioxide are balanced - this allows our body to function
easily. 

 

Exercise breathing 

Our breathing rate increases during exercise to take in more oxygen. The
body uses the extra 

oxygen to fuel the muscles and so produces more carbon dioxide. The
increased breathing rate 

leads to more carbon dioxide being expelled. This means that the balance
between oxygen 

and carbon dioxide levels is maintained. 

 

Anxious breathing 

When we are anxious our breathing rate increases: we take in more oxygen and
breathe out 

more carbon dioxide than usual. However, because the body is not working any
harder than 

normal it is not using up any extra oxygen, and so it is not producing any
extra carbon dioxide. 

Because carbon dioxide is being expelled faster than it is being produced
its concentration in 

the blood goes down (leading to a temporary change in the pH of the blood
called respiratory 

alkalosis). This change in CO2 blood concentration can lead us to feeling
unpleasantly lightheaded, 

tingly in our fingers and toes, clammy, and sweaty. 

 

When our breathing returns to its usual rate the levels of carbon dioxide in
the blood return to 

normal, and the symptoms resolve. You can deliberately relax your breathing
to feel better. 

 

Breathing techniques:

There are several breathing techniques and since each person is different it
may take a different style to help you. The most important thing for you to
do in the beginning is to practice. Practice a few minutes in the morning
and evening. When you begin to feel stressed or anxious begin the breathing
technique you have practiced. 

 

Breathing techniques below:

 

* Controlled breathing

Technique One:

Breathe in through your nose; having your breath expand your diaphragm,
count to four

Breathe out through your mouth, pursing your lips like a fish or kiss, count
to eight (you are breathing out slowly)

After you feel comfortable with the technique you may want to incorporate
words or colors. For example, many people find the color blue as a calming
color when you breathe in imagine the color blue and add a word such as
calm, relax,  I feel calm, I am calm, I feel relaxed, and/or I am relaxed.
While breathing out you may add the color red, black, or any other color
that denotes the negative feelings you are experiencing.  Adding words such
as releasing, letting go or I am releasing, I am letting go.

 

Technique Two: from psychologytools.org

1) Sit or lie down comfortably. Close your eyes if you would like to 

2) Breathe slowly and steadily in through your nose for a count of 4 

3) Hold your breath for a count of 2 

4) Breathe out slowly and steadily for a count of 4 

5) Repeat for a few minutes 

 

Technique Three: The Lion's Roar

This one is good for children but I love to share this with adults as well.


Take a deep breath through your nose.

On the exhale, open your mouth wide and roar like a lion. 

If you get a negative feeling in your head, you are most likely not
breathing through your diaphragm.  If you get a feeling in your head that
makes you giddy then you are doing the technique correctly.

 

Technique Four: Cigarette smokers 

Many people believe that smoking cigarettes calms; however, actually your
blood pressure rises. The actual calm comes from the breathing. If you are a
smoker, you may find that pretending to have a cigarette in your hand and
breathe as if you are smoking you may find this lowers your stress and
anxiety.

 

Another form of relaxation is called  Progressive Muscle Relaxation. There
are many forms of this technique. The one below is geared for
children;however, it is great for adults as well. Adapt to fit your
lifestyle.

Progressive Muscle Relaxation for Children 

Author: Koeppen, A.S. (1974). Relaxation training for children. Elementary
School Guidance and Counseling, 9, 14-21. 

 

Introduction 

Today we're going to practice some special kinds of exercises called
relaxation exercises. These exercises help you to learn how to relax when
you're feeling up-tight and help you get rid of those
butterflies-in-your-stomach kinds of feelings. They're also kind of neat
because you can learn how to do some of them without anyone really noticing.
In order for you to get the best feelings from these exercises, there are
some rules you must follow. First, you must do exactly what I say, even if
it seems kind of silly. Second, you must try hard to do what I say. Third,
you must pay attention to your body. Throughout these exercises, pay
attention to how your muscles feel when they are tight and when they are
loose and relaxed. And fourth, you must practice. The more you practice, the
more relaxed you can get. Do you have any questions? Are you ready to begin?
Okay, first, get as comfortable as you can in your chair. Sit back, get both
feet on the floor, and just let your arms hang loose. That's fine. Now close
your eyes and don't open them until I say to. Remember to follow my
instructions very carefully, try hard, and pay attention to your body. Here
we go. 

 

Hands and Arms  (you may substitue a stress ball or socks balled up for the
lemon)

Pretend you have a whole lemon in your left hand. Now squeeze it hard. Try
to squeeze all the juice out. Feel the tightness in your hand and arm as you
squeeze. Now drop the lemon. Notice how your muscles feel when they are
relaxed. Take another lemon and squeeze. Try to squeeze this one harder than
you did the first one. That's right. Real hard. Now drop the lemon and
relax. See how much better your hand and arm feel when they are relaxed.
Once again, take a lemon in your left hand and squeeze all the juice out.
Don't leave a single drop. Squeeze hard. Good. Now relax and let the lemon
fall from your hand. (Repeat the process for the right hand and arm.) 

 

Arms and Shoulders 

Pretend you are a furry, lazy cat. You want to stretch. Stretch your arms
out in front of you. Raise them up high over your head. Way back. Feel the
pull in your shoulders. Stretch higher. Now just let your arms drop back to
your side. Okay, kitten, let's stretch again. Stretch your arms out in front
of you. Raise them over your head. Pull them back, way back. Pull hard. Now
let them drop quickly. Good. Notice how your shoulders feel more relaxed.
This time let's have a great big stretch. Try to touch the ceiling. Stretch
your arms way out in front of you. Raise them way up high over your head.
Push them way, way back. Notice the tension and pull in your arms and
shoulders. Hold tight, now. Great. Let them drop very quickly and feel how
good it is to be relaxed. It feels good and warm and lazy. 

 

Jaw 

Let your jaw hang loose. Notice how good it feels to let your jaw drop. Open
your mouth as wide as you can and then close it.  Repeat this three times
(This section has been revised by Merry Schoch)

 

Face and Nose 

Here comes a pesky old fly. He has landed on your nose. Try to get him off
without using your hands. That's right, wrinkle up your nose. Make as many
wrinkles in your nose as you can. Scrunch your nose up real hard. Good.
You've chased him away. Now you can relax your nose. Oops, here he comes
back again. Right back in the middle of your nose. Wrinkle up your nose
again. Shoo him off. Wrinkle it up hard. Hold it just as tight as you can.
Okay, he flew away. You can relax your face. Notice that when you scrunch up
your nose your cheeks and your mouth and your forehead and your eyes all
help you, and they get tight too. So when you relax your nose, your whole
body relaxes too, and that feels good. Oh-oh. This time that old fly has
come back, but this time he's on your forehead. Make lots of wrinkles. Try
to catch him between all those wrinkles. Hold it tight, now. Okay, you can
let go. He's gone for good. Now you can just relax. Let your face go smooth,
no wrinkles anywhere. Your face feels nice and smooth and relaxed. 

 

Stomach 

Hey! Here comes a cute baby elephant. But he's not watching where he's
going. He doesn't see you lying in the grass, and he's about to step on your
stomach. Don't move. You don't have time to get out of the way. Just get
ready for him. Make your stomach very hard. Tighten up your stomach muscles
real tight. Hold it. It looks like he is going the other way. You can relax
now. Let your stomach go soft. Let it be as relaxed as you can. That feels
so much better. Oops, he's coming this way again. Get Ready. Tighten up your
stomach. Real hard. If he steps on you when your stomach is hard, it won't
hurt. Make your stomach into a rock. Okay, he's moving away again. You can
relax now. Kind of settle down, get comfortable, and relax. Notice the
difference between a tight stomach and a relaxed one. That's how we want to
feel--nice and loose and relaxed. You won't believe this, but this time he's
coming your way and no turning around. He's headed straight for you. Tighten
up. Tighten hard. Here he comes. This is really it. You've got to hold on
tight. He's stepping on you. He's stepped over you. Now he's gone for good.
You can relax completely. You're safe. Everything is okay, and you can feel
nice and relaxed. This time imagine that you want to squeeze through a
narrow fence and the boards have splinters on them. You'll have to make
yourself very skinny if you're going to make it through. Suck your stomach
in. Try to squeeze it up against your backbone. Try to be skinny as you can.
You've got to be skinny now. Just relax and feel your stomach being warm and
loose. Okay, let's try to get through that fence now. Squeeze up your
stomach. Make it touch your backbone. Get it real small and tight. Get it as
skinny as you can. Hold tight, now. You've got to squeeze through. You got
through that narrow little fence and no splinters! You can relax now. Settle
back and let your stomach come back out where it belongs. You can feel
really good now. You've done fine. 

 

Legs and Feet 

Now pretend that you are standing barefoot in a big, fat mud puddle. Squish
your toes down deep into the mud. Try to get your feet down to the bottom of
the mud puddle. You'll probably need your legs to help you push. Push down,
spread your toes apart, feel the mud squish up between your toes. Now step
out of the mud puddle. Relax your feet. Let your toes go loose and feel how
nice that it feels to be relaxed. Back into the mud puddle. Squish your toes
down. Let your leg muscles help push your feet down. Push your feet. Hard.
Try to squeeze that puddle dry. Okay. Come back out now. Relax your feet,
relax your legs, relax your toes. It feels so good to be relaxed. No
tenseness anywhere. You feel kind of warm and tingly. 

 

Conclusion 

Stay as relaxed as you can. Let your whole body go limp and feel all your
muscles relaxed. In a few minutes I will ask you to open your eyes, and that
will be the end of this practice session. As you go through the day,
remember how good it feels to be relaxed. Sometimes you have to make
yourself tighter before you can be relaxed, just as we did in these
exercises. Practice these exercises everyday to get more and more relaxed. A
good time to practice is at night, after you have gone to bed and the lights
are out and you won't be disturbed. It will help you get to sleep. Then,
when you are really a good relaxer, you can help yourself relax at school.
Just remember the elephant, or the mud puddle, and you can do our exercises
and nobody will know. Today is a good day, and you are ready to feel very
relaxed. You've worked hard and it feels good to work hard. Very slowly,
now, open your eyes and wiggle your muscles around a little. Very good.
You've done a good job. You're going to be a super relaxer. 

 

* Visualization Relaxation Technique

Imagine an image or memory that brings only positive thoughts and feelings.
If you find there are any negative connections do not use the image,
thought, and/or memory.  Find one that just promotes positive reactions.
Once you have the image in your mind, add the controlled breathing, words,
and colors. Notice how your body feels, notice how you feel emotionally.
Enjoy the moment.  You may also use this technique with relaxing music.
After practicing this technique for some time, find an object that has a
positive connection with you.  It may be a momentum or a smooth stone. While
you are breathing, imagining, and feeling relaxed, put the object in your
dominant hand and wrap your hand around the object and continue to stay in
the state of relaxation and calm. After practicing this form of the
technique, you will find that you have trained your mind to automatically
form a positive reaction when holding the object in your hand. 

 

* Thought stopping techniques

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) suggest that our thoughts provoke a
feeling and our feelings provoke a behavior/actionn. When we learn to tame
or reframe those 55,000 (approximately) thoughts we have each day we create
a different outcome. Here are some techniques that can help with thought
stopping. When a negative thought comes to your mind, imagine a "stop sign"
or "remote control in your hand to pause the thought".  At this point in
time you may add some positive self talk. Please find below one of my
favorite internet finds:

*  Anxiety Tip Sheet - The Value of "Self Talk" By John Dauer, LCSW, ACSW

 

Introduction

 

You have a dilemma: a health problem, sadness, fear, problems in your
marriage, anger, panic, anxiety, pain. 

"I'm stuck in life!" 

How many times do we hope that some external force will help us: someone's
love, God, a doctor,  a pill, alcohol? Certainly, it is wise to use all
legitimate and healthy resources possible to assist you in achieving health
and well-being. Merry's commentary for clarification purposes negative
resources are not beneficial in promoting health and well-being.

In mental health, you play the major part in changing your old self into the
new, happy person you desire to be. How do you take charge? The way you
think about some problems may determine  whether you are passive and
defeated, or you are active and determined. 

 

Think Positive 

In some cases if you think negative, and you are defeated. Think positive,
and you get  positive results. Would not you agree that all of us talk to
ourselves? Yes, every thought is self-talk. We consciously talk to our
subconscious mind. The subconscious is our inner mind that guides us. It has
also helped us through many emotional dilemmas so we could survive. That
Inner Mind is our pilot that flies us through life.  Our self-talk
determines the direction our subconscious will take: the road of life or the
road of death. Why not consider the subconscious as our friend, a powerful
friend. 

What you say to yourself is often what you get. 

"What a lousy day! I wonder what awful things will happen. I'll never get
through  this." 

Or: 

"No matter what happens, I am getting through it. I am finding solutions." 

Your self-talk is food for your Inner Mind. Self-talk is an active,
deliberate method of feeding our brain. You can take charge of your destiny.
The way you talk, however, is not a honey-coated positive thinking: 

 "It's a nice day." 

"It" never does  anything. The self-talk is constructed with forceful
actions and solutions. We become our own coach. Here are some examples: 

 I am doing everything necessary to solve this problem. 

 I am eating only healthy quantities of healthy foods. 

 I am learning how to be a better partner. 

 No matter what others do, I keep my focus. 

 I find ways to distract myself from the pain. 

 I will discover ways to heal quickly. 

 I am taking care of myself. 

 I will push myself to get it done." 

 

You do not even have to know how you will solve a problem.  Trust in the
wisdom of your unconscious mind: 

"Before  I know it, this is behind me. I am  finding a job I like that pays
well." 

 

You can also combine prayer with self-talk: 

"Dear Lord, with your help, I get it done on time." 

 

It is very important that you write out your self-talk sentences. Here are
some examples of effective self-talk strategies: 

 

Be  Realistic

My goal is realistic, attainable by me. It is not too much. The goal is not
an exaggeration, such as "I am the best in the world."  

It is also not too little which would underestimate my abilities and
capabilities. A good example:  "Every day in every way I am studying
effectively." 

 

Use "I" 

"I" language allows the subconscious to take the message personally. "I"
affirms me. Generalities do not connect with the inner me. Not "Money will
come to me", but "I am making an adequate amount of money to live
comfortably." 

 

Be Noncompetitive with others

I compete only with myself and my own previous achievements, not against
others.  This prevents hostility. I seek the best I am capable of doing.  

Example: 

"I am earning more than i made last year." 

 

Be Positive

I state what I want, not what I wish to quit. Example: "I am eating only
healthy quantities of  healthy food." vs. "I am losing weight." Change any
negative into its positive description.. The  conscious mind is less likely
to criticize the positive. 

 

Use Present Tense

Future tense ("I will _____.") is too easily doubted by the critical
conscious mind. It is best to describe the goal as being achieved right now.
"Every day in every way I am taking care of my health." Make the verbs in
the present continuous tense ( verb ends in "ing") which means right now I
am doing something to realize my goal. 

 

See the Finished goal

Let the future be now as if the goal is already being achieved. "All days in
all ways I am earning $________ a year, or, I am facing my
responsibilities." Speak as if the goal is already accomplished today."  

 

Be Definite

Words like try, hope are general and really mean maybe. "I will try," has
the hidden message of  "maybe I won't." or "I can't" or "I don't want to."
It is best to be certain and put the goal into a measurable quantity. "I am
studying adequately to pass the test."  

 

Embellish

A mental image filled with emotion is very effective for the inner mind to
generate energy to  accomplish the goal. Allow yourself to feel the feelings
of satisfaction, happiness, excitement, joy, celebration as one imagines the
scene of self with the achieved goal. "I can feel the satisfaction of
celebrating my new job." 

 

Be Specific

The more exact the goal, the better. It is important, however, not to be too
specific because  then it becomes a chance for the critical conscious mind
to sabotage the goal. The subconscious mind does not perform magic. ("In
three days I will quit smoking.") This is better: "Every day in every way I
am giving myself clean and healthy lungs." 

Once you have written out your sentences, you then repeat them many times a
day, especially at  night, because the subconscious never sleeps and works
on getting your goals. It works best through  repetition. As you notice
progress, you can update your sentences, always creating new ones. Since we
are always talking to ourselves, we get used to talking in this effective
way all the time. "I am  making today a good day." 

 

Thanks for coming to the seminar. I hope you enjoyed our seminar and that
these tools and techniques add positive benefits to your life! Please know
your mind has the power to create negative bodily sensations when you are
stressed and anxious, but more importantly that the mind can be trained by
using the above techniques to create a place of calm, relaxation, and peace.

 

Here's to peace and calm,

Merry C. Schoch, LCSW

merrys at verizon.net

813 625 1850