[Nfbf-l] [NFBF-l] Letter Opposing Dining in the Dark

Sun Oct 14 22:06:33 UTC 2018

Wonderful post on Dining in the Dark Brian! It was such a pleasure to have you and Earline at my table. Between the two of us, we were able to educate our other table guests a whole lot about how, with the appropriate skills, blind people dine out frequently. The difference is that usually we continue to dine in the dark while the light dependent have the benefit of seeing their food. 
Let me say that I do have difficulty at times making certain that I don't have too bid of a bite on my fork or to suddenly realize that I have forked a piece of lemon that goes into my mouth. Kind of funny really. I am so glad that most of the chicken we are served these days are boneless as it's a real challenge for me to gracefully cut up a chicken breast that is still on the bone. I know many of our sighted guests just resorted to picking up their food and wiping their hands on their glass of water and then on the cloth napkin. After all, no one knew the difference since we were all enjoying a delicious meal in the dark. Of course, you and I did not have a problem cutting up our bondless chicken, putting salad dressing on our salads and the like. Actually, it was kind of neat having the opportunity to help our sighted guest out with these kinds of things. 
All in all, great fun was had by all! Certainly sighted guests were amazed at how blind people handle it all with poise and class. 

Thanks again for the beautifully written post! 

Kathy

-----Original Message-----
From: Nfbf-l [mailto:nfbf-l-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Brian Norton via Nfbf-l
Sent: Sunday, October 14, 2018 1:12 AM
To: nfbf-l at nfbnet.org
Cc: Brian Norton
Subject: Re: [Nfbf-l] [NFBF-l] Letter Opposing Dining in the Dark

I have not previously attended a Dining in the Dark event. However, when my friend Kathy Davis informed me that our local Center for the Visually Impaired recently had its annual rent increased by the present Tallahassee administration and DBS from its previous nominal annual lease charge to an increased rent of $50,000 I had no alternative except to help. My personal experience that dinner evening with the many sighted persons attending was best described by empathy, rather than sympathy or fear. Kathy and I discussed to our table-mates the challenges of eating out in restaurants and showed them some training tips which made the whole experience pleasant and often humorous. The woman sitting next to me initially showed anxiety and fear, but I held her hand and discussed my emotional distress upon becoming blind in my middle age. I explained that my fears disappeared as I gained adaptive knowledge from workers at places similar to the CVI. I explained that such learning is provided by CVI free to all blind persons, and alternative state agency training was unfortunately insufficient. Chris Dixon spoke confidently of his traumatic teenage accident which stole his vision at 16 years old, the resulting emotional distress, and his 
wonderful emergence    from  self pity and dependence into a successful 
educated professional.
The Center for the Visually Impaired   through Dining in the Dark 
donations raised thousands of dollars to keep its doors open for blind adaptive and accessible training without charge to students of all ages.
I believe the hundreds of dinner guests realized that blind persons can be confident and successful at more than just eating in the dark, and that contributing to educational centers for blind motivated individuals is a noble form of charity. It is wrong to assume that persons donate time and money out of pity rather than kindness, compassion, and love of others. Blind persons receive many special social, economic, and political benefits. I do not believe that 
receiving these special services   make blind persons the object of 
pity. White Cane laws, favored social security disability status, the state agency DBS, and even favored treatment to Guide dog users do not necessarily interfere with a blind person’s motivation and self-image. 
Taking advantage of these favored status benefits assist blind persons to more fully enjoy life independently in spite of their physical impairments. I never felt any pity from contributors at the recent CVI Dining in the Dark event. To the contrary, the various sighted guests were amazed to realize that I was totally blind. They were very interested in my story of adapting my life successfully to the 
challenges of losing my vision,while    still retaining my positive 
self image, motivation, and humor. Blindness does not define me, and every day is a new adventure. , .

Brian Norton, J.D.
NFB Greater Daytona Beach President
Florida NFB Deaf Blind Vice President
NFB National DB Division Board Member

Original message:
> Kathy this is well written. You have been blessed and in turn have 
> helped many blind people in your community and beyond. There are many 
> ways of teaching people about blindness that are you effective. Thank you.
> Marilyn Baldwin

> Sent from my iPad

>> On Oct 11, 2018, at 3:48 PM, Kathy Davis via Nfbf-l <nfbf-l at nfbnet.org> wrote:

>> Beautifully stated Brook! I totally concur with you! I have raised 3 
>> sighted children as a blind mother, worked for 30 years as a 
>> counselor and teacher at Daytona State College, founded the Center 
>> for the Visually Impaired, carved out a new life for myself after my 
>> beloved husband was called home to the Lord, engaged in a myriad of 
>> community activities, lived alone for almost 15 years now, graduated 
>> from the Louisiana Center for the Blind in my sixties and on and on. 
>> By no means do I consider myself a victim but instead strive to be an 
>> example to others who have recently lost their sight or were not 
>> blessed with parents like I had who made me believe I could do most 
>> anything. Sure, there are things I truly wish I could do like drive a 
>> car, see my children and grandchildren's faces, enjoy photographs 
>> like was once the case but then most of us have some sort of 
>> disability or challenge that make some things not doable.
>> I am all about dining in the dark events and have chaired two of them 
>> for the Center for the Visually Impaired, a wonderful agency I 
>> founded back in the late eighties. Although our guest all dine in 
>> complete darkness, I am able to address the guests when the lights 
>> come on once more. At that time, I stress the fact that blindness 
>> doesn't have to hold us back from achieving most of our hopes and 
>> dreams once we learn the crucial skills of blindness. Our guests 
>> learn a whole lot from the event and so much interest is stimulated 
>> about the worth of the Center for the Visually Impaired. Many want to 
>> observe the training activities we provide and make a donation to 
>> support our mission. No, I do not feel like a victim. Instead, with 
>> God's help and guidance from the NFB and CVI as well as the Louisiana 
>> Center for the Blind, I am able to lead a very active and productive 
>> life. I particularly enjoy reaching out to other blind and visually 
>> impaired folks who need my guidance and support.

>> With warmest regards,

>> Kathy Davis

>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: Nfbf-l [mailto:nfbf-l-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of 
>> PLipovsky via Nfbf-l
>> Sent: Thursday, October 11, 2018 2:11 PM
>> To: 'NFB of Florida Internet Mailing List'
>> Cc: PLipovsky
>> Subject: Re: [Nfbf-l] Letter Opposing Dining in the Dark

>> Wow Brook, that was excellently stated.

>> I too love that little jem of a quote, "be yourself, everyone else is 
>> already taken".

>> I personally have never thought of myself as a victim, but someone 
>> who can do what she wans, when she wants.  I've never let anyone tell 
>> me I couldn't do anything, although I know as a person living with 
>> vision loss there are definitely limitations.  For instance, I'll 
>> never be a brain surgeon, but then this also applies to a whole bunch 
>> of other folks sighted or not.

>> Anyway, just adding my two sense.  Hope you are doing well.

>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: NFBF-l <nfbf-l-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Brooke Evans 
>> via Nfbf-l
>> Sent: Thursday, October 11, 2018 11:55 AM
>> To: nfbf-l at nfbnet.org
>> Cc: Brooke Evans <brooke6358 at aol.com>; nfbf-l at nfbnet.org
>> Subject: Re: [Nfbf-l] Letter Opposing Dining in the Dark

>> Bah humbug!  I say.

>> I have read every word posted on the dining in the dark opinions, 
>> which are not always in sync with all people at any given time.

>> Briefly, I support any activity I can use as a tool to enhance my 
>> life not only as a blind, low vision person but a blind profoundly 
>> hard of hearing person diagnosed as  deaf blind.

>> What I hear throughout all I read has been the blind are still 
>> perpetuating the idea that we are a victim of society. I am not a 
>> victim of society. As a blind woman with profound hearing loss I have 
>> engaged in education about my own way of living life as I moved 
>> through my life as a young child, student, wife, mother of four, 
>> grandmother, great-grandmother, supporting a career military husband 
>> for 28 years, working part time, full part time, whatever was needed 
>> to help the family coppers and never ever thinking I was a victim of my own circumstances.

>> Any event, such as dining in the dark, to me is an invaluable tool 
>> for myself as well as four  others in my life  circles. I have 
>> attended for dining in the dark events in the past 10 years and 
>> believe it or not, I have learned more about my own self through 
>> these events which has given me a wider perspective on blindness and 
>> how to communicate that to my family, and people in the public square.

>> Just giving  my humble opinion here which  was hugely   expanded when I 
>> saw a “hashtag” gem of a    quote,  by one of our very own NFB Floridians.

>> This nugget told me to* “be yourself. Everybody else is taken.”

>>  This little Oscar Wilde gem tells me I am not a victim of the world 
>> I see. I am walking through life as everyone else walks through life...
>> experiencing and lending my understanding to those whom I meet along 
>> my journey, and this includes events such as dining in the dark.

>> I appreciate the psychological data and what it takes to build data 
>> but we are no longer  avictim of anything but ourselves. Take a look 
>> at what we have accomplished in nearly 80 years of advocacy, tough 
>> advocacy, breaking down all manner of  barriers. The list is long. 
>> This is now 2018 and for me all that has gone before me has helped me 
>> to come into this moment of wisdom.

>> Thank you for listening.

>> Brooke Evans

>> Ask yourself: “do I dare shake up the universe?”     ~T.S. Eliot

>> Begin forwarded message:

>> From: Marion Gwizdala via NFBF-l <nfbf-l at nfbnet.org>
>> Date: October 10, 2018 at 8:06:13 PM EDT
>> To: "NFB of Florida Tampa Chapter List" <nfbf-tampa at nfbnet.org>, "NFB 
>> of Florida Internet Mailing List" <nfbf-l at nfbnet.org>
>> Cc: Marion Gwizdala <marion.gwizdala at verizon.net>
>> Subject: [Nfbf-l] Letter Opposing Dining in the Dark
>> Reply-To: NFB of Florida Internet Mailing List <nfbf-l at nfbnet.org>

>> Dear Florida Federation Family,

>>               A week or so ago, I sent a message to these lists 
>> concerning Dining in the Dark fund raising events. These messages 
>> were triggered by a Tampa Bay chapter member who, in spite of knowing 
>> the National Federation of the Blind's opposition to such events, 
>> announced one being hosted by the Tampa Lighthouse for the Blind. I 
>> understand another community rehabilitation program (CRP) is hosting 
>> such an event. As per my previous message, it is the policy of the 
>> NFB to voice our opposition to such events when we learn of them and 
>> to encourage those conducting them to reconsider an event that only 
>> serves to reinforce the negative stereotypes of blindness and demean 
>> the blind they purport to serve.

>>               As the president of the National Association of Guide 
>> Dog Users and with the encouragement of President Riccobono, I have 
>> written the message below with the unanimous consent of the NAGDU 
>> board of directors. I encourage you to read this message, along with 
>> the supporting supplemental information accompanying it so you are 
>> better educated about our rationale for opposing these sort of events.

>> Fraternally yours,

>> Marion Gwizdala

>> From: president at nagdu.org [mailto:president at nagdu.org]
>> Sent: Wednesday, October 10, 2018 4:00 PM
>> To: 'cbenninger at guidedogs.com'
>> Cc: board at nagdu.org; officeofthepresident at nfb.org
>> Subject: Concerning Canine Heroes Auction
>> Importance: High

>> Dear Ms. Benninger,

>> Via Email: CBenninger at guidedogs.com

>>           I am writing on behalf of the National Association of Guide 
>> Dog Users (NAGDU), a division of the National Federation of the Blind 
>> (NFB), concerning Guide Dogs for the Blind's intention to use a 
>> blindness simulation episode during its upcoming Canine Heroes Auction.
>> Though the National Federation of the Blind is a proponent of the use 
>> of learning shades - sometimes referred to as "sleep shades" - to 
>> effectively train individuals in the techniques of blindness, we 
>> object to the use of simulation as a fund raising technique. Whether 
>> intended or not, simulation exercises tend to invoke fear and pity in 
>> the participants, compromising the goals of the National Federation 
>> of the Blind and, I would hope, those of guide dogs for the Blind.

>>           Placing a blindfold on a sighted person does not help the 
>> person understand what it is like to be blind; rather, such simulations 
>> only serve to reinforce the negative stereotypes and misconceptions 
>> that compromise our ability to fully participate in our community as we 
>> strive to live the lives we want. This is not only the opinion of the 
>> National Federation of the Blind; it is also the conclusions of 
>> research in simulation exercises conducted by social psychologists. A 
>> blindfolded sighted person will not encounter a waitress asking their 
>> 5-year-old what her father wants to drink, strangers grabbing and 
>> pushing the blind person where the well-meaning individual thinks they 
>> are wanting to go, A doctor asking the blind person who bathes them, or 
>> the condescending comments of pity offered by the public, all incidents 
>> I and nearly every other blind person have experienced.

>>           We realize the importance of raising funds to continue the 
>> work of Guide Dogs for the Blind; however, we object to the 
>> exploitation of the fear of blindness and the demeaning of the blind as 
>> the tool for raising those funds. We believe the Canine Heroes Auction 
>> would be just as successful without the simulation episode and urge 
>> Guide Dogs for the Blind to publicly join the National Association of 
>> Guide Dog Users and the National Federation of the Blind by condemning 
>> and opposing the use of simulation exercises as a fund raising technique.

>>           For your information, I have attached the text of Resolution
>> 2012-04 condemning the use of simulation exercises as a fund raising event.
>> I am also including below links to two articles which recently appeared 
>> in the Braille Monitor, the monthly publication of the National 
>> Federation of the Blind. One of these articles is written by Mark 
>> Riccobono, president of the National Federation of the Blind, and the 
>> second by Dr. Ariel Silverman, a Social Psychologist.

>> Walking a Mile: The Possibilities and Pitfalls of Simulations by Mark Riccobono

>> https://nfb.org/images/nfb/publications/bm/bm17/bm1704/bm170402.htm

>> Disability Simulations: What Does the Research Say?

>> By Ariel Silverman, Ph.D.

>> https://nfb.org/images/nfb/publications/bm/bm17/bm1706/bm170602.htm

>>           In closing, I would like to share the spontaneous, 
>> unsolicited impressions of an executive with a major airline after 
>> attending two simulation events. "It struck me as not a realistic 
>> simulation of what it must be like for a blind person to eat a 
>> meal.After having done the exercise twice, I have learned a few of the 
>> techniques that a person might use to eat their dinner, but I have no 
>> illusions that it taught me much at all about the overall experience or 
>> skills required in life.  Unfortunately, I'm sure that a large number 
>> of people who left the exercises think they learned more than they really did.

>> With kind regards,

>> Marion Gwizdala, President

>> National Association of Guide Dog Users Inc. (NAGDU)

>> National Federation of the Blind

>> (813) 626-2789

>> President at NAGDU.ORG

>> Visit our website <http://nagdu.org/>

>> Follow us on Twitter <http://twitter.com/nagdu>

>> The National Federation of the Blind knows that blindness is not the 
>> characteristic that defines you or your future. Every day we raise 
>> expectations because low expectations create barriers between blind  
>> people and our dreams. You can live the life you want! Blindness is not 
>> what holds you back.

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