[NFBF-L] Sharing a great article from this month's Braille Monitor

[shaaron]

Hi Kay:

 

Thank you for sending out this timely article for me. I found it uplifting
in coping with life negativity.

 

Shanti

 

From: NFBF-L <nfbf-l-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Kaye Baker via NFBF-L
Sent: Thursday, January 12, 2023 8:42 AM
To: 'NFB of Florida Internet Mailing List' <nfbf-l at nfbnet.org>
Cc: Kaye Baker <kaye.j.zimpher at gmail.com>
Subject: [NFBF-L] Sharing a great article from this month's Braille Monitor

 

Good morning Federation Family and Friends:

This morning,  I was bored at work, yes,  full disclosure, it happens, and I
was looking over the Braille Monitor for convention info.

I ran across the below article, and felt it was definitely true, and worth
sharing. 

As someone who has truly had a negative couple of years, this article
further solidifies that sometimes the way we think is more powerful  than
anything else we do.

I hope you enjoy it.

 

 

How Going Blind Helped Me Rediscover the Power of Optimism

by Sameer Doshi

>From the Editor: Sameer has gotten some publicity lately as he promotes his
book, The Work Ahead. As you will see from this article he wrote for the
Braille Monitor, he works at Microsoft, went blind in his early working
years, had some difficulty adjusting, and now believes he is onto something
that not only can help blind people but the rest of the world as it
struggles with being positive in a time when negative makes the headlines.
Here is his offering, which we receive with thanks:

We've all been there. Just when things are going great, life unexpectedly
throws you a lemon or a curveball. What do you do? When you have no other
option, you make lemonade. You catch the curve ball. I learned this at
thirty-one when I went blind overnight. In the years since this devastating
surprise, I've made all my dreams come true.

How did this happen? It all comes down to the power of optimism. That's it!
Optimism helped me to adapt and continue working in tech, where along the
way I've excelled and landed my dream job at Microsoft. I even wrote a
novel-about optimism. Stay with me here. I'm about to give you the secret
code to develop a forcefield that will repel any nasty situation that comes
for you. Here we go!

What's the deal with pessimism?

The events that shape us are like Double Stuf OREOs, a fascinating
juxtaposition of good and bad. Long term, we tend to forget the good (these
things are delicious!) and dwell on the bad (OMG I ate the entire package?!)
This is human nature. But, when we spend too much time worrying, it becomes
part of our daily thought process and clouds our perception with negativity.
Life becomes tedious. You feel like you're in a rut. This is where optimism
comes in! Changing the way your brain frames daily life will change your
life.

The power of optimism

Remember what I told you about me going blind when I was thirty-one? Now is
when I tell you it also happened to be about a month after my daughter was
born. I went blind overnight. There was no warning. In a time of great joy
and transition in my life, everything around me was dark. For months, all I
could think of was what I could not do. I mean, I was struggling to just put
toothpaste on my toothbrush! The only thing I could do to help my wife was
simply holding our newborn daughter. I felt like a total failure.

Then, little by little, I switched over to the power of positive thinking. I
got an appointment with the Spectrios Institute for Low Vision, and it was
there that I was reminded I still had unlimited potential. A counselor, who
herself was blind, taught me about a special software to allow me to use a
computer again. Then came other lessons, including how to put that
toothpaste on my toothbrush. I thought, hey, if I could learn so much in so
little time, maybe just maybe, life might get back to the way it was before.

Embrace the new normal

Did life get back to the way it was? No. It did not. It took another two
years of learning and practice, but I slowly mastered skill after skill. I
trained my inner dialogue to help rather than hinder. I just learned how to
pour a cup of coffee. That's a win! I just signed up to learn Braille. Win!

Gradually, the pile of small victories turned into a mountain of
accomplishments, and I forged ahead doing the things I wanted to do, at
every turn thinking of it as a win. Walking the dog became a win. Working
out became a win. I had turned into a winning machine! My life wasn't the
way it was before. It was better.

Focus on the work ahead

With so many wins and successes under my belt, I found the energy to keep
challenging myself. I built a tactile Rubik's Cube and solved it! I learned
to play the guitar. If you keep yourself busy, you don't think of your
challenges as obstructions. I know you've probably got your hand raised,
ready to ask, "But, you said life has a way of throwing bad stuff at me?"
First of all, it's very polite of you, but no need to raise your hand. I'm
blind. (Thank you - I'll be here all week, folks!)

I'm not saying you have to avoid bad situations. I'm saying you should have
a plan for handling them and turning them into wins. This is the work ahead.
I left Spectrios with a long list of tasks. I forced myself to forget about
the distant future and zero in on what I could do now. Imagine the loftiest
goal you've ever had. Now center down and realize that every small step you
take gets you closer to that goal.

Shape your reactions

I can't control my emotions, but I can control how I react. You can too.
When I was deep into learning Tom Petty's Free Fallin' on the guitar, I'd
miss a chord here and there and get so frustrated! I sighed. I frowned.
Then, I took a breath. I let the frustration evaporate and then do you know
what I did? I subjected my loved ones to yet another Free Fallin' attempt. I
just kept playing.

I trained myself to make a conscious effort to modulate my reactions. The
world is complicated. There's already a lot of bad stuff. I vow to resist
the temptation to make it worse.

Flex your good memory muscles

Optimism takes practice. One of the best ways to do this is to reinforce
memories of your accomplishments. I like to pretend I'm giving myself an
annual performance review, except I don't list any bad feedback. Instead, I
focus on all the growth I've had in the last year. Simple things like
emptied the dishwasher before I went to bed most nights count. I'll include
any new places I've been, books I've read (Thanks, Talking Books!), shows
I've watched (Thanks, descriptive audio!), or new recipes I've made. Make a
list of the good stuff. You'll realize just how awesome you are!

Going blind forced me to rediscover optimism and create techniques to infuse
it in everything I do. This has helped keep the darkness at bay and taught
me to push myself to grow. It's been a decade since I lost my sight, and
just recently I re-learned how to ride a bike. My daughter and I biked along
a nature trail! Win!

Six final points:

*	When life brings bad news, you can choose to be angry and devastated
or to look for the bright spots and move toward them.
*	When you push through the hard times, there are always better times
on the other side.
*	Surviving big setbacks and failures makes failure feel okay. And
that is a superpower.
*	Overcoming huge challenges shows you how adaptable the human brain
is and teaches you that you can accomplish just about anything. It also
makes you more curious and eager to continually learn.
*	Being an optimist and spreading optimism really does help make the
world a better place.

 

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