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<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2>I liked this. One thing that I don't like
that people do is defend other when the are patronizing or rude, saying things
like, maybe they've never seen a blind person, or give them other excuses.
It happens to me all the time.</FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2></FONT> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2></FONT> </DIV>
<BLOCKQUOTE
style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 5px; MARGIN-LEFT: 5px; BORDER-LEFT: #000000 2px solid; MARGIN-RIGHT: 0px">
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial">----- Original Message ----- </DIV>
<DIV
style="BACKGROUND: #e4e4e4; FONT: 10pt arial; font-color: black"><B>From:</B>
<A title=nfbk@nfbnet.org href="mailto:nfbk@nfbnet.org">Kevin Pearl via
Nfbk</A> </DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"><B>To:</B> <A title=nfbk@nfbnet.org
href="mailto:nfbk@nfbnet.org">NFBK</A> </DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"><B>Cc:</B> <A title=kvnprl@twc.com
href="mailto:kvnprl@twc.com">Kevin Pearl</A> </DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"><B>Sent:</B> Tuesday, May 19, 2015 5:38 PM</DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"><B>Subject:</B> [Nfbk] Article: 10 Mistakes That
Hurt Blind People the Most</DIV>
<DIV><BR></DIV>
<DIV>I just ran across this article and thought it interesting enough to
share. What are your thoughts?</DIV>
<DIV><BR></DIV>
<DIV>By: Caitlin Hernandez.</DIV>
<DIV><BR></DIV>
<DIV>
<P class=p1
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class=s1 style="box-sizing: border-box">There are many aspects of blindness
that I wish were more universally understood: What we typically do and do not
need help with, the fact that we’d much rather have people ask questions than
say nothing at all and the reality that just because we do everyday things a
bit differently, we aren’t performing magical, wondrous feats by any
means.</SPAN></P>
<P class=p1
style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; MARGIN: 0px 0px 2px; PADDING-TOP: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; text-rendering: optimizelegibility"><SPAN
class=s1 style="box-sizing: border-box">But these problems can be solved
fairly quickly once you become friends with a blind person, sit down to think
seriously about them or do a Google search. So instead of sounding like every
“How to Interact With a Blind Person” article ever, I’ve put together a list
of the top 10 mistakes that even my friends and family sometimes make. Even
though they don’t happen often, they are the kind of gaffes that tend to hurt
or bother me the most when they do occur.</SPAN></P>
<P class=p1
style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; MARGIN: 0px 0px 2px; PADDING-TOP: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; text-rendering: optimizelegibility"><SPAN><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: 700; box-sizing: border-box">1. Don’t play
games.</SPAN> Playing childhood games like “How many fingers am I holding
up?” and “I’m going to pretend I’m not in the room with you” are not cute or
funny.</SPAN></P>
<P class=p1
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class=s1 style="box-sizing: border-box"><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: 700; box-sizing: border-box">2. No
surprises.</SPAN> You may think it’s funny to run up behind your blind
friend, playfully grab them and yell, “Boo!” But it will never, ever be funny
to us. If you do this, you will probably either get punched or feel the pain
of our cane introducing itself to your kneecaps. </SPAN></P>
<P class=p1
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class=s1 style="box-sizing: border-box"><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: 700; box-sizing: border-box">3. Mess with my cane, and you
shall regret it.</SPAN> Never take or move anyone’s mobility aid without
asking. If you’d like to look at it, or even take it for a spin, by all means
ask. I’ll most likely let you. But you’d better not run off with it or leave
me stranded somewhere without it.</SPAN></P>
<P class=p1
style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; MARGIN: 0px 0px 2px; PADDING-TOP: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; text-rendering: optimizelegibility"><SPAN>Also,
if I don’t have my cane for whatever reason, it would be extra nice if you’d
let me know you’re aware of this and are keeping an eye out.</SPAN></P>
<P class=p1
style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; MARGIN: 0px 0px 2px; PADDING-TOP: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; text-rendering: optimizelegibility"><SPAN><SPAN
class=s1 style="box-sizing: border-box"><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: 700; box-sizing: border-box">4. I do not need an interior
decorator.</SPAN> I know sometimes it’s an accident, but please don’t
move my things without telling me. Especially if we’re at my house, and you
move something then leave. </SPAN>Rearranging my stuff to fit feng shui
principles could cost me a few hours.</SPAN></P>
<DIV
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<DIV
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<P class=p1
style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; MARGIN: 0px 0px 2px; PADDING-TOP: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; text-rendering: optimizelegibility"><SPAN
class=s1 style="box-sizing: border-box"><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: 700; box-sizing: border-box">5. Sighted does not equal
superior.</SPAN>Sometimes sighted people like tell me how to dress and present
myself in a condescending tone. I can’t see what I look like, but that doesn’t
mean I don’t have my own sense of self, identity and image. If I want your
advice, I’ll ask for it. But generally, I prefer compassion, not a list of
“you coulds” and “you shoulds.”</SPAN></P>
<P class=p1
style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; MARGIN: 0px 0px 2px; PADDING-TOP: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; text-rendering: optimizelegibility"><SPAN
class=s1 style="box-sizing: border-box"><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: 700; box-sizing: border-box">6. Quit
comparing.</SPAN> Blindness is just one trait. It doesn’t have any
bearing on anything else about blind people as individuals. We come in all
different flavors — like ice cream. We don’t like being compared to other
blind people. “He could do this independently, why can’t you?” “He liked
audiobooks, why don’t you?” “He wasn’t awkward, why are you?”</SPAN></P>
<P class=p1
style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; MARGIN: 0px 0px 2px; PADDING-TOP: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; text-rendering: optimizelegibility"><SPAN
class=s1 style="box-sizing: border-box">Perhaps worse is being held up
alongside famous blind people like Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder. We can’t
all be blind freaking superheroes and, more to the point, most of us don’t
want to be blind freaking superheroes. Most of us are just normal people who
happen to be blind.</SPAN></P></DIV>
<DIV
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<P class=p1
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class=s1 style="box-sizing: border-box"><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: 700; box-sizing: border-box">7. Be a sensitive sighted
guide.</SPAN>Unlike many blind people, I’m not particularly fussy about how I
walk with sighted guides. If we’re close, warm-and-fuzzy pals, I’ll most
likely link arms or hold hands with you. If we’re more formal acquaintances,
I’ll do the traditional hand-on-elbow sighted guide. But here’s the bottom
line: Don’t ever clench my wrist or hand in a vise-like grip and yank me
around like I’m a 2-year-old. Don’t push and pull me by the shoulders, shove
me from point-to-point with your hand on my back or fling your hands all over
me in an attempt to show me where to go. Not acceptable.</SPAN></P>
<P class=p1
style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; MARGIN: 0px 0px 2px; PADDING-TOP: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; text-rendering: optimizelegibility"><SPAN
class=s1 style="box-sizing: border-box"><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: 700; box-sizing: border-box">8. Either ignore the blind
flails or help.</SPAN> If you happen to notice me fumbling around looking
for my drink or my napkin, see my cane get stuck in a crack in the sidewalk
and slam me in the chest or watch as I get spectacularly lost and wander
around in circles trying to get my bearings, please don’t make a big scene
about it. </SPAN></P>
<P class=p1
style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; MARGIN: 0px 0px 2px; PADDING-TOP: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; text-rendering: optimizelegibility"><SPAN
class=s1 style="box-sizing: border-box">My blindness-related shortcomings
aren’t fair game for dinnertime story hour, unless I make it plain that a
healthy dose of teasing commentary is OK and won’t upset me. I’ll love you
forever if you ignore these blind flails, or if you laugh them off with me and
keep them between us. I’ll love you even more if you can see a blind flail
coming and can help me avoid it in a discreet manner (this, of course, takes
some practice.)</SPAN></P>
<P class=p1
style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; MARGIN: 0px 0px 2px; PADDING-TOP: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; text-rendering: optimizelegibility"><SPAN
class=s1 style="box-sizing: border-box"><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: 700; box-sizing: border-box">9. Don’t be
dismissive.</SPAN> If I confide in you that something’s tough or scary
for me because blindness adds an extra layer, please don’t discount my
feelings by saying, “Everyone feels like that sometimes.” I appreciate that
you’re trying to make me feel better and less alone, but this type of response
can come across as flippant. It’s as if you’re thinking, “Don’t think you’re
such a tragic, special, uniquely broken little snowflake just because you’re
blind.” Do we all struggle? Of course. But blindness can indisputably make our
struggles different. If I’m revealing blindness vulnerability, which I rarely
will unless I trust you quite a lot, it will mean the world to feel listened
to, understood and validated.</SPAN></P></DIV></DIV>
<DIV
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<P class=p1
style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; MARGIN: 0px 0px 2px; PADDING-TOP: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; text-rendering: optimizelegibility"><SPAN
class=s1 style="box-sizing: border-box"><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: 700; box-sizing: border-box">10. I do not exist to make
you look awesome.</SPAN> Don’t make a big, braggy show of helping me, so
you’ll look like a hero in front of the guy you have a crush on. Don’t talk
about me patronizingly as if I’m Baby Einstein: “Look what Caitlin can do all
by herself! Isn’t she so smart?” And don’t treat me like a trained seal:
“Caitlin, show everyone how you Braille, use the computer and walk a straight
line!” If you just ask me nicely, “Caitlin, would you mind showing us how you
text?” I’ll be happy to do a demo nine times out of 10.</SPAN></P>
<P class=p1
style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; MARGIN: 0px 0px 2px; PADDING-TOP: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; text-rendering: optimizelegibility">This
article is online at:</P></DIV></DIV>
<DIV><A
href="http://themighty.com/2015/05/10-mistakes-that-hurt-blind-people-the-most1/">http://themighty.com/2015/05/10-mistakes-that-hurt-blind-people-the-most1/</A><BR><BR><BR></DIV>
<P>
<HR>
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