[nfbmi-talk] Off Topic But Funny FW: This will Make You Smile

[Fred Wurtzel]

From: Vickie [mailto:rolisonv at yahoo.com] 
Sent: Thursday, May 12, 2011 12:59 PM
To: Vickie
Subject: This will Make You Smile

 

If  you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would  have produced
enough sound
energy to heat one cup of  coffee.
             (Hardly  seems worth it.)
If  you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough  gas is
produced to
create the energy of an atomic  bomb.
 (Now  that's more like  it!)
The  human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to  the body to
squirt
blood 30  feet.
       (O.M.G.!)
A  pig's orgasm lasts 30  minutes.
 (In  my next life, I want to be a  pig.)
A  cockroach will live nine days without  its
head  before it starves to death.
(Creepy.)
 (I'm  still not over the  pig.)
Banging  your head against a wall uses 150 calories an  hour.
 (Don't  try this at home ;  maybe  at work.)
The  male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is  attached to its
body.
The female initiates sex by  ripping the male's head  off.
 (Honey,  I'm home . What  the...?)
The  flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a  human jumping the
length
of a football  field.
(30  minutes. Lucky pig! Can you  imagine?)
The  catfish has over 27,000 taste  buds.
(What  could be so tasty on the bottom of a  pond?)
Some  lions mate over 50 times a  day.
(I  still want to be a pig in my next life....quality over  quantity.)
 Butterflies  taste with their feet.
 (Something  I always wanted to  know.)
The  strongest muscle in the body is the  tongue.
 (Hmmmmmm.......)
Right-handed  people live, on average, nine years longer than  left-handed
people.
(If  you're ambidextrous, do you split the  difference?)
Elephants  are the only animals that cannot  jump.
 (Okay,  so that would be a good  thing.)
A  cat's urine glows under a black  light.
(I  wonder how much the government paid to figure that  out.)
An  ostrich's eye is bigger than its  brain.
 (I  know some people like  that.)
 Starfish  have no brains.
 (I  know some people like that,  too.)
 Polar  bears are left-handed.
 (If  they switch, they'll live a lot  longer.)
Humans  and dolphins are the only species that have sex for  pleasure.
(What  about that pig? Do the dolphins know about the  pig?)
Now  that you've smiled at least once, it's your
turn  to spread these crazy facts and send this to
someone  you want to bring a smile to,
maybe  even a chuckle.
In  other words, send it to  everyone!
 (you Gotta  love  that pig!)

 

May God's blessings be with you today and evermore!