[NFBMI-Talk] Sharing Something I Did for BEAM

[debrag1374 at sbcglobal.net]

Hi all,

 

I wanted to share this before now, but it wasn't ready to be published until
some time last week. I hope that it is okay to share this here.

Kari Havenaar from Disability Network that serves Washtenaw, Livingston and
Monroe counties was working on a project blog for BEAM about people who have
multiple identities and she asked me if I'd be interested in working with
her on this project. My story is below.

 

Blind and Low Vision Awareness + Intersectionality

Written by Debbie Wellington and Kari Havenaar, MA



Image Description: Debbie is sitting on a black leather chair with a white
wall in the background and is wearing a bright red shirt. Debbie has brown
eyes and brown hair that is styled in locs. Debbie is looking straight
forward and smiling.

Debbie, a blind resident of Michigan, has been a participant in our blind
and low vision peer group at Disability Network for 2 years. Here at DNWML,
our blind and low vision support group is open to individuals across the
state. This is her story. 

---

Growing up in a mixed-race family was a blend of interesting, confusing, and
awkward experiences. I was diagnosed as visually impaired at birth due to
Retinitis Pigmentosa, and at the age of 37 lost almost all of my vision. My
mother, a European/Native American from Canada, and my biological father, a
Black/Native American from Chicago, IL, were not well-versed in raising a
visually impaired child. I wasn't alone in this; my sister is also visually
impaired. When my mother married my stepfather, life took a different turn.
My stepfather, a Black man from Mississippi, became more of a father to me
than my biological father ever was. He was a strong, determined man who
never gave up easily. He ensured I attended all my eye appointments,
received a proper education, and, most importantly, believed in me. My
mother, on the other hand, shared my biological father's doubts about my
independence, possibly due to cultural differences or a lack of education 

Junior high school was a challenging time. I was often bullied for wearing
thick glasses, leading me to fight back and eventually get suspended. My
mother had to bring me back to school, after my suspension, and her presence
sparked curiosity and ridicule about my having a white mother. Despite
attending a mixed-race school, the ones who mocked me were mostly
Dark-skinned Black girls, while Latino students were generally kind, and
Black boys were friendly. The presence of colorism was rampant within the
school system I attended and that shaped my experiences with the school
system. I also received blatant racism from staff and other students who
were white as well. One incident that stands out was when my typing teacher,
(a white woman), upon seeing my mother, asked if I was adopted. Her question
disturbed me, and I responded, "No, haven't you ever heard of a mixed-race
person?" My answer clearly unsettled her. 

My stepfather passed away when I was fifteen, but he left me with a lasting
legacy: the belief that I could achieve anything I set my mind to. As an
adult, I felt compelled to prove to my mother and biological father the
values my stepfather had instilled in me. It wasn't until then that my
mother began to respect me and treat me like my other siblings, a dynamic
that lasted until her passing in 2007. These experiences have shaped my life
as someone with intersecting identities. 

My life today looks a bit different in some ways than that of my childhood.
I am a mother who also has a mixed-race daughter; however, she isn't looked
at as mixed race because of the darker complexion she possesses. The effects
of colorism are still prevalent today in my experiences with others. In
comparison to my young adulthood, I am immensely more confident with myself
and my disability, even though the community around me still struggles with
internalized ableism, especially with the blind and or low vision community.
I am always a work in progress as I learn and grow through the stages of
life. I also have very creative hobbies today and love to sing and consider
myself to be quite funny and make others laugh.

 

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