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</o:shapelayout></xml><![endif]--></head><body bgcolor=white lang=EN-US link=blue vlink=purple style='word-wrap:break-word'><div class=WordSection1><p class=MsoNormal>Hi Gary, <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I love this and appreciate your wisdom. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I think one thing that helps, especially for kids and blind young adults is having blind mentors who will just do things with you. I hated my cane as a child, like detested everything about it. It wasn\u2019t until I found the NFB and NFB canes that I thought maybe the cane wasn\u2019t my sworn enemy after all. I still prefer a dog, but I have definitely recognized that going places with my cane is a great thing. But no blind person sat me down and gave me a lecture on the long white cane. They just used it with me and helped me pick one out that I actually liked. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I think it\u2019s true that younger people copy what they see more than they obey what they hear. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Missing all of my Missouri friends,<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Julie<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><div><div style='border:none;border-top:solid #E1E1E1 1.0pt;padding:3.0pt 0in 0in 0in'><p class=MsoNormal><b><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri",sans-serif'>From:</span></b><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri",sans-serif'> NFBMO <nfbmo-bounces@nfbnet.org> <b>On Behalf Of </b>Julie H via NFBMO<br><b>Sent:</b> Thursday, August 13, 2026 4:11 PM<br><b>To:</b> NFB of Missouri Mailing List <nfbmo@nfbnet.org><br><b>Cc:</b> Julie H <julie.magnolia62@gmail.com><br><b>Subject:</b> Re: [NFBMO] Looking for discussion and recommendations<o:p></o:p></span></p></div></div><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif'>Dear Gary,</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif'>The older I grow and I have a birthday on the 22nd of August, I know that I do not have all of the answers I was so certain of as a green girl who thought she knew the world and her place in it. Your wisdom put in such a heartfelt way always makes me pause to think, to smile and to reaccess my own growing potential.</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif'>Thank you so truly.</span><o:p></o:p></p><blockquote style='border:none;border-left:solid black 1.5pt;padding:0in 0in 0in 4.0pt;margin-left:3.75pt;margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt'><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif'>----- Original Message ----- <o:p></o:p></span></p><div><p class=MsoNormal style='background:#E4E4E4'><b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif;color:black'>From:</span></b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif;color:black'> <a href="mailto:nfbmo@nfbnet.org" title="nfbmo@nfbnet.org">Afton Harper via NFBMO</a> </span><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif'><o:p></o:p></span></p></div><p class=MsoNormal><b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif'>To:</span></b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif'> <a href="mailto:nfbmo@nfbnet.org" title="nfbmo@nfbnet.org">NFB of Missouri Mailing List</a> <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif'>Cc:</span></b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif'> <a href="mailto:afton5797@gmail.com" title="afton5797@gmail.com">Afton Harper</a> <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif'>Sent:</span></b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif'> Thursday, August 13, 2026 2:46 PM<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif'>Subject:</span></b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif'> Re: [NFBMO] Looking for discussion and recommendations<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Gary, <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Thank you so much for this thoughtful message about relevance. This message resonates with me deeply. And now I try to take on a growth mindset with anything I decide to put on my plate. And it's helped me better understand my own personal capacities and potential, too.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>So, thank you for your wisdom today. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>On Thu, Aug 13, 2026, 14:14 Gary Wunder via NFBMO <<a href="mailto:nfbmo@nfbnet.org">nfbmo@nfbnet.org</a>> wrote:<o:p></o:p></p><blockquote style='border:none;border-left:solid #CCCCCC 1.0pt;padding:0in 0in 0in 6.0pt;margin-left:4.8pt;margin-right:0in'><div><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Can any of you relate to the experience of deciding something wasn\u2019t relevant, only to pass on learning it to your ultimate disadvantage? Here are some thoughts I\u2019d love you reaction to:<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>I learned the word <i>relevant</i> somewhere along the way, and I sometimes think I learned it too well.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Once I grasped the concept, I began sorting the world into what was relevant to me and what was not. If I could see a direct line between a subject and my immediate goals, I paid attention. If I couldn't, I tuned out.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>The problem wasn't a lack of capacity; it was a lack of perspective. At a young age, I assumed I was qualified to decide what I would need to know for a life I had not yet lived.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>In school, my teachers tried to instill the eight parts of speech. I learned just enough to get by, but I dismissed formal grammar. I could already write reasonably well\u2014mostly through reading and imitation. Why did I need to know whether a word was an adverb or a conjunction, a preposition or an adjective?<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Years later, I became the editor of a magazine.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Suddenly, what I had dismissed as tedious became essential. As an adult, I had to work twice as hard to master what I\u2019d been given every opportunity to learn as a child.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>I don't share this because I believe children should give blind obedience to adults. And I certainly don't believe blind children should be taught compliance as a substitute for independence. We want blind children to ask hard questions, challenge assumptions, take risks, and ultimately take charge of their own destiny.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>But independence isn't the same as omniscience. It doesn't mean assuming we already know everything required to make good choices.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>One of the hidden ingredients of potential is learning to weigh the experience of those who have traveled farther down the road.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Parents know things their children do not. Teachers know things their students do not. Older blind people know things younger blind people do not. None of them is infallible. Their advice will sometimes be wrong, and what they call wisdom may occasionally be nothing more than habit, fear, or outdated bias. Blind people know better than anyone that adults can harbor tragically low expectations for blind children.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>So the lesson can never simply be "Listen to your elders."<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>It is something far more nuanced: Learn to distinguish between someone trying to limit your future and someone trying to prepare you for a future you cannot yet imagine.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>That distinction matters enormously\u2014especially for blind children.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>A young blind person might reasonably ask: Why learn to cook when food can be delivered? Why learn independent travel when someone is willing to drive? Why master Braille when speech technology can read text aloud? Why learn to manage money, organize a room, speak comfortably with strangers, or conquer a tedious subject in school?<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Sometimes there is an immediate, obvious answer. Sometimes there isn't.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Sometimes the best answer is simply: "I can't show you today exactly when you'll need this, but those who have built the independent life we want for you say that it matters."<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>That conversation requires humility on both sides.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Parents must accept that their children will eventually outgrow their knowledge. A blind child will discover tools and methods a sighted parent never envisioned. Technology evolves; expectations shift. No parent can script a child's future.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>But children need humility, too. They are being prepared for a world they haven't yet met.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>I wish I had understood that sooner.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>There were things adults wanted me to learn that seemed completely disconnected from my life. Sometimes I was right\u2014some of those things made little difference. But sometimes I was spectacularly wrong. I confused <i>"I don't see why this matters"</i> with <i>"This doesn\u2019t matter."</i><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>They are entirely different statements.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>That is why I've grown deeply cautious of the word "relevance." Showing relevance creates immediate motivation, and that has value. But we must teach something deeper: You cannot always know in advance what life will require of you.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Education is partly preparation for the known, and partly insurance for the unknown.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>This truth shapes how we ought to think about potential. We often talk about potential as if it were merely intelligence plus drive. It isn't that simple. What we achieve depends on what we are taught, the opportunities we receive, the expectations placed on us, our resources, our obstacles, who we meet, and plain good fortune.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Because of this, we should be slow to look at anyone and declare they have "wasted potential." We rarely know the full weight someone else is carrying.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Yet acknowledging different starting points doesn't mean abandoning personal responsibility. It gives us a better framework for it.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>The useful question is never, <i>"Why aren't you doing what someone else is doing?"</i><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>It is, <i>"What can you do with what you have?"</i><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>And the companion question for parents and mentors is, <i>"What can I give this child today that enlarges their choices tomorrow?"</i><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Sometimes that means encouragement. Sometimes opportunity. Sometimes it means refusing to accept low expectations born of blindness. And sometimes it means insisting a child master something whose purpose they cannot yet see.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>It is a delicate balance. We want children to become the authors of their own lives. But authors need a rich vocabulary before they can write, and much of that vocabulary is acquired long before we know which words we'll need.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>At seventy-one, I cannot return to that childhood classroom. I cannot tell my younger self to pay attention to grammar or listen more closely to advice he was quick to dismiss.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Nor would I spend much time scolding him.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>What I would ask him\u2014and any young person willing to listen\u2014is simply to leave a little room for uncertainty.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Ask questions. Challenge assumptions. Demand reasons. Take ownership of your life.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>But when someone who genuinely cares about your future tells you something is worth learning, consider one possibility: The reason you cannot see its relevance today may not be that it lacks value.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>It may simply be that you haven't traveled far enough down the road to see it yet.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:12.0pt'><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> <o:p></o:p></p></div><p class=MsoNormal>_______________________________________________<br>NFBMO mailing list<br><a href="mailto:NFBMO@nfbnet.org" target="_blank">NFBMO@nfbnet.org</a><br><a href="http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/nfbmo_nfbnet.org" target="_blank">http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/nfbmo_nfbnet.org</a><br>To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for NFBMO:<br><a href="http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/nfbmo_nfbnet.org/afton5797%40gmail.com" target="_blank">http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/nfbmo_nfbnet.org/afton5797%40gmail.com</a><o:p></o:p></p></blockquote><div class=MsoNormal align=center style='text-align:center'><hr size=2 width="100%" align=center></div><p class=MsoNormal>_______________________________________________<br>NFBMO mailing list<br><a href="mailto:NFBMO@nfbnet.org">NFBMO@nfbnet.org</a><br><a href="http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/nfbmo_nfbnet.org">http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/nfbmo_nfbnet.org</a><br>To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for NFBMO:<br><a href="http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/nfbmo_nfbnet.org/julie.magnolia62%40gmail.com">http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/nfbmo_nfbnet.org/julie.magnolia62%40gmail.com</a><o:p></o:p></p></blockquote></div></body></html>