[nfbwatlk] Questions concerning how people look like

Fri Feb 26 21:33:03 UTC 2010

David Wermuth
www.atozadaptiveaidz.com
Email / David at atozadaptiveaidz.com
Phone (352) 593-4915
Toll free (877) 759-7173
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Prows, Bennett (HHS/OCR)" <Bennett.Prows at HHS.GOV>
To: "NFB of Washington Talk Mailing List" <nfbwatlk at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Friday, February 26, 2010 8:10 AM
Subject: Re: [nfbwatlk] Questions concerning how people look like


> Well,  since no one has yet responded, I'll take a brief shot at this
> one. And, I wouldn't take the lack of response as intimidation.
>
>
> I'm Not sure why this is so interesting.  I won't generalize about blind
> folks, but just for myself.  I think though that "looks" in the first
> instance are not as important as sighted people make them.  Not that I
> am disinterested, but looks just aren't as relevant as knowing the
> persons, taking them as their personality dictates, just generally
> relating to people on a daily basis, etc.
>
> I *hate* touching faces.  (Unless of course it's during an intimate
> moment, smile).  I don't think it really tells you much about the
> individual, and  it seems to me it is that activity is not only
> offensive to many, but invasive too.
>
> If the issue is whether you want to ask a person for a date, I still say
> the personality, and how you relate in the first place is more relevant
> than the looks, until you get to know her/him and can determine
> appearance by subtle touches, or by asking the person directly. As you
> know,, you can always ask a sighted associate for a description, if
> you're scoping out the person.
>
> Now, I will say that we do live in a visually dependent world, and I
> think that a person's appearance does tell a lot about him/her.  That is
> why we all should be concerned about personal grooming, clothing, etc.
> But on a routine, day to day basis, I just am not as concerned about
> what the person looks like when I'm talking to her/him.
>
> One more thing.  Body language and nonverbal queues are important to
> sighted folks as well.  A whole psychological industry has been
> developed by interpreters of this silent language.  But blind persons
> too can interpret what a person is really thinking by paying attention
> to things like voice inflection, the brief moment of silence when a
> question is asked, or a comment is made,  the location of the voice when
> the head is turned, a sigh, etc. There are many nonverbal things we use
> to communicate, and we're no different, I think than sighted persons in
> that regard.
>
> Just a few thoughts.
>
> /s/
>
> Bennett Prows
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: nfbwatlk-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nfbwatlk-bounces at nfbnet.org]
> On Behalf Of hmp
> Sent: Thursday, February 25, 2010 5:51 PM
> To: BlindTlk at nfbNet.org
> Cc: hal.grove at gMail.com; nfbWaTlk at nfbnet.org
> Subject: [nfbwatlk] Questions concerning how people look like
>
> TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN:
>
>     I'm very sure everyone in this mailing list is blind. Maybe
> some of you are not. And well, I have a curiosity, or a question,
> that maybe you can answer for me and if it is not that
> intimidating:
>     As you know, sighted people tend to look at each other's
> face, or perhaps most of the body movements and the hands, while
> they're talking to each other. For example, when somebody is
> talking and facing another person, that person faces that other
> person, and he or she can look at the person's face. In addition,
> this does not happen when they are talking only; the person can
> just look at that other person, E.G. a boy says "hello" to a girl
> perhaps, and he looks at her because she is pretty (or she
> perhaps isn't) and he looks at her smile and he knows what she
> looks like. He can maybe remember her just through all those
> details of her. Furthermore, there are more case-scenarios out
> there that are very similar to this one.
>     While sighted people do this, as far as blind people are
> concerned, is there any way a blind person can do the same things
> just like the sighted? Can a blind person tell how someone looks
> like by some technique or some information? If I want to know how
> someone looks like, what can I do? Sometimes I think that
> probably by touching faces I can get a general detail of what
> he/she is like, but some people may see this as an offensive
> thing. I have just a little bit of vision (mostly out of the
> corner of my right eye), but I cannot see well enough to see
> these things. I can only see very close objects or people. But
> anyways, if, for example, I meet a nice girl and she says hello
> to me, and she carries out a conversation with me. How can I get
> the physical description of her? How do I know if she is just
> smiling without laughing? How do I know what her hair looks like?
> maybe she has a pointy nose, a big/small mouth, and probably
> really all straight and white teeth! How can I know these things?
> I could perhaps ask her, "What do you look like?" but I've had
> bad experiences asking that question, although some people are
> kind and they tell me. Again, I don't see any bad thing by
> touching people's faces, however, I'm not sure if I should
> totally do it because of an offense or just being disrespectful.
>     I am asking this question just for curiosity, and I'd like
> to see what you think about this. Any feedback and comments about
> this topic are welcome. I'd like to find out what other blind
> people have done to accomplish well this situation.
>
> Thank you and have a very lucky day!
>
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