[stylist] question

Wed Mar 25 22:54:06 UTC 2009

Angela:

Thanks for your thoughtful response!

You are right in that deaf people are inclined to seek each other out.  

And it makes sense that blind people are different, because they communicate
in the same language as sighted people.  I have no doubt there are
advantages to this.  But one small disadvantage would be that, since they do
use the same language, they are going to be more suspectible to
internalizing paternalism.  Mainstream society has more access to
influencing blind people.  

I suppose this just means the process of adapting to a new identity is
different and require different steps.  De-internalizing audism in deaf
people is pretty easy; it's easy to peel off the bad stuff from their minds
because those bad stuff never stuck very well for the simple reason it's in
a foreign language.  Deaf people experience audism, sure, but mostly only
the overt stuff that's very easy to point a finger at and to protest
against.  The more subliminal, off-radar messages don't penetrate much
because it's not even picked up in the first place.  When someone says "Oh,
I'm sorry for you . . ."  It is simply not heard at all and for all we know,
the person never said that.  

As for denial, of course I know it!  I went through a couple of months of
that when I changed schools and the new school didn't know me and at the old
school I never had to think about it or explain anything, because I just
grew up with those kids.  But I come in into a new group of kids, and I am
different in some ways from them.  So there was a rift, sending me into
denial and some confusion.  But the school had some cool staff who had adult
deafblind friends, and my father, himself deafblind, got involved.  We set
up a deafblind awareness day at the school, and while it introduced my peers
to deafblindness, it did something important for me: The adult deafblind
presenters, after they were done, were mobbed by deaf kids wanting to talk
with them.  My peers thought they were cool.  I realized then that
deafblindness itself was never the problem and never would be.  It's all
about how I present myself, and by embracing deafblindness, by having it
emblaonzed on my chest in loud and clear capital letters, this helped set up
deafblind as an acceptable part of the range of individuals and diversity in
the school community.  So, from that time on, it was never an issue.

At Gallaudet, there were some low vision deaf students.  But you know, they
were in denial and all upthight.  They had no friends.  But I had no
problems, because I embraced my identity, and this did a lot to help others
embrace me.  So much so that they'd forget that I am deafblind.  I remember
my girlfriend telling me something funny.  She was telling some of her
friends that he was seeing John Lee Clark.  But those girls didn't know who
that was, so she described me--tall, brown hair, green eyes, style of
clothing, signing style, remember Orientation day when he gave that little
speech that brought down the house?  But those girls still weren't sure . .
.  Then my girlfriend realized that it might help to mention what she'd
"forgotten" to mention, that I was blind, and she told the girls this, and
the girls were like, Ooooh, yes, we've seen him around, but why didn't you
say he was blind in the first place?  

Before everyone, absolutely everyone on campus, knew me, I'd have friends
tell me the same thing about their telling others about me.  Anyway,
everyone got to know me because I became the Chief Justice of the student
juidcary and--I am sure this will come to you as no surprise--I immediately
stirred up a controversy by preventing the Vice Speaker from assuming the
Speakership of the student congress after the old one resigned because of a
scandal.  I got no special treatment, as one of the school papers did a
smear job on me and put me on the cover with devil horns added to my head.
It didn't hurt me one bit, and the presidential race I ran after that won
three times the combined votes all of the other teams got.  Ah, but those
were fun times!

But my point is, I found that by embracing my identity so much, it would
fairly vanish.  I was not regarded as special, I was treated no different,
and I was just me.  

This is why I love "blind people" language, and why I'm dead against
person-first terminology--people who are blind and all that.  By putting
blind first, front and center, the quicker it disappears and the faster the
human person emerges.

John

-----Original Message-----
From: stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of Angela fowler
Sent: Tuesday, March 24, 2009 11:25 PM
To: 'NFBnet Writer's Division Mailing List'
Subject: Re: [stylist] question

John, I think you have it, though your writing was clearly meant for a
friendly audience. What you say about the experience of the deaf in
mainstream school... Yes, it must be lonely as hell for them. Communication
is such a precious thing, I mean, being able to ask someone "did I really
see that?" or "What's your take on that?" These things we all take for
granted. You folks find each other and... RELIEF! You can communicate freely
anything you want. It stands to reason that deaf folks, in particular
deaf-blind folks are so close-knit.
	People who are losing there vision however don't have that desperate
need for communication. They can still relate to their sighted peers, and
there are many ways to cover for lack of vision. To become blind means
undertaking a total transition for formerly sighted folks. They literally
need to learn to do things differently: read, get from place to place, use a
computer, cook, the list goes on and on. To say that they are "blind" means
that they have to except in their very hearts the need to undergo this
transition. 
	John, you say you were sighted for half your life, so surely you
have some idea how difficult that transition is? Hell, I've been totally
blind all my life and I can imagine. Have you ever heard of denial?
Sometimes it is a wonderful defense mechanism, allowing us to put off facing
things until we are really ready to face them. At other times it allows us
to hide from the truth, living a lie because it is easier to do so than to
admit reality. I don't know which it is for these folks who refuse to use
the word Blind, but I prefer to be charitable and go with the former. With
implicit education, being taught the skills of blindness without people
hammering it into there heads, we can only hope that they eventually come
around.  

-----Original Message-----
From: stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of John Lee Clark
Sent: Tuesday, March 24, 2009 10:04 PM
To: 'NFBnet Writer's Division Mailing List'
Subject: Re: [stylist] question

Angela:

Can you share with me the issues surrounding the blind word for potential
new members?  I find this baffling.  Don't they know that blind is hip?
Don't they crave to be more blind, to meet the blind ideal?

If you visited Gallaudet University, the Deaf college, you'll see many, many
mainstreamed deaf students coming in and they quickly understand what the
Deaf ideal is and they scramble to learn to sign better, to act more Deaf,
so they can have better social positions and get in the hottest
fraternities.  They learn very fast what's what.  

So our organizations don't have any problems with the word Deaf.  It's a
desirable label for many.

But it's probably easier to indoctirinate the mainstreamed deaf students
because their lives at school were horrible.  Lonely, interpreters their
only friends, parents can't communicate, all of that.  So they'[re only too
glad to move on.

But blind students, they get more deeply snared, I suppose,  So it may be a
far more delicate matter to get the stupid hooks out of their minds, huh?

John

-----Original Message-----
From: stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of Angela fowler
Sent: Tuesday, March 24, 2009 8:24 PM
To: 'NFBnet Writer's Division Mailing List'
Subject: Re: [stylist] question

I prefer the word blind, but in California I'm kind of in the
recruitment/chapter building business. Its not wise to beet new comers over
the head with the B word. For me, that's a hard lesson I'm still learning.  

-----Original Message-----
From: stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of LoriStay at aol.com
Sent: Tuesday, March 24, 2009 4:26 PM
To: stylist at nfbnet.org
Subject: Re: [stylist] question

Good question.   But there may be as many answers as there are NFB members.
Lori
In a message dated 3/24/09 3:21:28 PM, johnlee at clarktouch.com writes:

> 
> Does NFB merely "prefer" the word blind?  It shouldn't.  it should 
> embrace it absolutely.
> 
> 

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