[stylist] Feedback request, General content: Minneapolis Bus

Sun May 2 04:00:39 UTC 2010

Excellent!  Judith
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "loristay" <loristay at aol.com>
To: "Writer's Division Mailing List" <stylist at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Saturday, May 01, 2010 10:00 PM
Subject: Re: [stylist] Feedback request, General content: Minneapolis Bus


> Wonderful!
> Lori
> On Apr 30, 2010, at 7:38:45 PM, BDM <lists at braddunsemusic.com> wrote:
>
> From:   BDM <lists at braddunsemusic.com>
> Subject:    [stylist] Feedback request, General content: Minneapolis Bus
> Date:   April 30, 2010 7:38:45 PM EDT
> To: stylist at nfbnet.org
> Any and all feedback is appreciated. Target might be publications looking
> for light hearted true stories. Content is rated G, general.
> In professional songwriting evaluations some ask how one wants feedback.
> Ranging from "Go easy on me" to "Give it to me straight I can take it". I
> always opt for the latter with request to not leave out stuff they feel
> works or they like. For any future evaluations/feedback here that's how
> I'll assume its given provided its worth your spending memory real estate
> haha.
>
>
> Minneapolis Bus
>
> Having been diagnosed with a retinal disease some years back. I had 
> decided
> to counteract the traumatic trick life had played and take a proactive
> approach. Before I lost usable vision I sought out an adjustment to
> blindness training center in Minneapolis Minnesota. This training center 
> is
> called Blindness Learning In New Dimensions or BLIND Inc. for short, and
> was affectionately yet quite accurately, known as the "boot camp for blind
> folks".
>
> Though apprehensions existed in what life would mean as a blind person, I
> looked forward to the challenge of learning skills that would enable me to
> live life successfully independent.
>
> Besides learning skills as white cane travel, cooking for a large group of
> people, reading and writing Braille, and other daily life skills
> accomplished strictly under blind folds , one final requirement must be 
> met
> using all of the mobility skills learned. In order to graduate a student
> must solely complete what is known as a five mile "graduation walk". While
> blindfolded students follow a list of Braille directions instructing them
> to cross noisy intersections, direct them to specific park locations, 
> cross
> bridges; board certain buses and make their way back to the training 
> center.
>
> Upon successful return, a freedom bell is rung in their honor and as if a
> congratulations button were pressed, peers and staff come applauding from
> classrooms with smiles, hand shakes, and pats on the back as they share
> victory over the test.
>
> The day of my graduation walk turned out to be an unseasonably warm one,
> and about three quarters of the way into my five mile graduation course, 
> my
> legs found great relief on the city transit portion of the test. On the
> surprisingly quiet bus with nothing else to do but listen to the engine
> roar and a buzzing fly next to me crashing its head into the window in
> efforts to escape, my attention was occasionally given to the entrance and
> exit of passengers at the stops.
>
> At one particular stop my ear picked up on a huge group of young 
> elementary
> kids boarding and consuming every available seat, leaving teachers and a
> few chivalrous passengers standing holding on to the grab bars. Excited
> conversation assured me the kids were on an early morning field trip.
>
> Sensing unusual activity at the front of the bus after the kids got on; I
> curiously cheated by lifting my blindfold to find two gents were boarding
> rather boisterously. Apparently they were still "having a night out";
> unaware the sun had risen right along with their blood alcohol level. One
> stared down the isle with concentrated beady eyes, pulled focus enough to
> find the bus full, and stood up front droopily hugging the vertical grab
> bar with both hands. The other fellow cockily swaggered about the bus
> exploring for a seat, using passenger's shoulders like rails in bumper
> bowling. The kid's chatter diminished as even they became aware of the
> state these two gents were in. Mid way down the long isle and recognizing
> the bus was full, the second fellow settled quietly to a staggered stance
> next to a nervous teacher. Both stood quiet, as did the rest of the bus
> with only the roar of the engine and squeak of the brakes for audible
> entertainment.
>
> Finally breaking the intense silence, the adventurous drunk swung his head
> sideways staring at the teacher, head bobbing from the bumpy ride and
> alcohol content. With half mast eyes he looked at the teacher and said

>
> "Pardon me sir."
>
> The Teacher nervously returned the look replying
>
> "Yes?"
>
> The inebriated man proceeded
>
> "Do you know Jesus Christ?"
>
> Wide eyed and perplexed at the source of the question, the teacher replied
>
> "Why, ah, yes. I do."
>
> The drunken man returned his bobbing head to a forward position slurring 
> in
> apparent amazement

>
> "Well it sure is a small world isn't it?"
>
> ©2010 Brad Dunse
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