[stylist] chapter two

[Barbara Hammel]

Judith, others may disagree but I like the way everyone else knows each 
other but Pessy has no clue.  It shows jjust how much withing herself she 
is.
I also like the way Chavy noticed the nonverbal interaction between the 
rabbi and Pessy.  It did almost bring tears to my eyes.
Maybe because chapter one starts on a dramatic note, there seems something 
missing compared to this one.
Barbara

...
Yesterday is
A path well-trod,
A familiar lane
Through sacred sod,
A road we travel
Too often, I fear,
For there are the good times
When things are hard here,
...

--------------------------------------------------
From: "Judith Bron" <jbron at optonline.net>
Sent: Tuesday, May 25, 2010 10:51 AM
To: "Stylist" <stylist at nfbnet.org>
Subject: [stylist] chapter two

> Here's chapter two of my book.  As usual, I would appreciate any feedback. 
> Best, Judith
>
> CHAPTER TWO
>
>
>
> The Same Saturday morning in Jenna, New York
>
>
>
> Standing on the bottom step Pessi smiled at her mother who lay on the sofa 
> in the dining room.  "Mommy, can I get you anything before I leave for 
> synagogue?"
>
> "No thanks, dear."  Pessi saw the look in her mother's eyes and braced 
> herself for the same lecture Mrs. Goldberg had been delivering for months. 
> "Pessi, you have to become involved with the girls at school.  I know many 
> of their mothers, and they are wonderful people."
>
> Pessi shrugged.  "I'm fine the way I am.  I like being alone."
>
> Her mother rebuked, "It isn't normal for a sixteen year old girl to exist 
> only for homework and her family.  You're a beautiful girl with a lot to 
> offer others.  Please make an effort to become friends with the girls at 
> school."
>
> She fixed her eyes on Pessi's unruly hair.  "You can't go to Shul with 
> your hair like that.  Put it in a bun."
>
> "I can't.  One of these days I'll get it cut."
>
> "Pessi, all I'm asking you to do is try."
>
> Using the traditional Sabbath greeting Pessi answered curtly, "Good 
> Shabbos, Mommy." She put on her ugly coat, stomped out of the house and 
> headed for her father's synagogue.  She preferred to run her life her way, 
> and if that meant being alone so be it.
>
> After services Pessi quietly came up behind two schoolmates.  She heard 
> petite Miriam, a walking billboard for a fashion magazine say to Ruthie, a 
> tall fashion icon, "Can you believe she goes in public looking so 
> disgusting?  Her coat is a reject from a charity sale.  Those shoes 
> haven't been seen since the Revolutionary War! Her hair is a nesting place 
> for rats with bad taste.  Nothing in the coatroom stood out like the moth 
> holes in her coat.  Gross!"
>
> Miriam abruptly switched topics.  "I have to get home.  Rabbi Goldberg's 
> speaking this afternoon.  Want to go?"
>
> Ruthie flashed a perfect smile revealing the expertise of her 
> orthodontist.   "Sure."
>
> "Great.  I'll pick you up after lunch."
>
> Ruthie and Miriam were so engrossed in their conversation that Pessi 
> didn't think the renowned tenth grade gossips noticed her.  Pessi had to 
> smile at their creative comments.  She knew very well how she looked, but 
> circumstances did this to a person.  Could girls like Ruthie and Miriam 
> ever understand there were more important things in a girl's life than 
> clothes and beauticians?
>
> Under the dreary November sky Chavy Levy headed home from the synagogue 
> her parents attended for years.  The most popular girl in her eleventh 
> grade class, Chavy had only three problems.  She had to lose 10 pounds, 
> her older brother Yigal had to be the most obnoxious person in the world 
> to live with, and she hated math.  She couldn't figure out why she had to 
> be in a class which had nothing to do with her future.  She had no idea 
> what she would be doing after graduation, but becoming a math teacher 
> wasn't an option!  Still, she had to pass or her parents would have a fit. 
> While strolling along on this Shabbos, Sabbath, morning she admired her 
> surroundings where the men wore traditional hats and younger boys donned 
> skullcaps appropriate for children.  Chavy tossed her shining brown hair 
> over her shoulder, and focused her bright brown eyes on the passers by. 
> Women walked with husbands, children or friends. All wore clothing 
> reflecting the special day.  This afternoon Chavy and her friends planned 
> to go to the B'nos club for girls which met every Shabbos or Saturday 
> afternoon to hear Rabbi Goldberg.  Chavy honestly believed her class to be 
> the greatest.  They all got along while having a ball working together 
> except for Pessi Goldberg who didn't talk to anyone.  Chavy shrugged and 
> continued on.
>
> At home her mother greeted her.  "Good Shabbos, Chavy.  Can you finish 
> this salad?"
>
> "Sure."
>
> A few minutes later the family gathered in the dining room for their 
> Shabbos day meal.  The legendary arguments between Chavy and her good 
> looking brother Yigal started almost immediately.  "Chavy, where's the 
> grape juice?"
>
> "On the door of the fridge."
>
> "Why isn't it on the table?  You know I can't start my meal without saying 
> the prayer over wine or grape juice."
>
> "Go get it.  The bottle isn't heavy."
>
> Their father boomed, "I've had enough from the two of you!  You can both 
> bring the juice to the table.  When you get back I don't want either of 
> you saying a word.  Obviously you're not mature enough to talk decently to 
> anyone."  They looked at each other before getting up.
>
> Done straightening up after the meal Chavy and her cute ninth grade sister 
> Chumy got ready for B'nos.  Yigal told Chavy, "You better be home for 
> sudat shlishit.  You're the only one who prepares the third Sabbath meal 
> so well."
>
> "It would serve you right if I couldn't be here. Then you'll be forced to 
> make it yourself!"
>
> "I can't even compliment you without some smart remark.  OK Chavy, Don't 
> come home to make your horrid food.  We'll live longer without it!"  He 
> smiled at her revealing the dimple in his right cheek.
>
> "All right, Yigal.  I won't be here.  I'm sure I can find a place where 
> they'll take me in."
>
> "Don't bet on it, Chavy.  It obviously takes a strong person like me to 
> put up with you."
>
> At the school door Chavy heard the tenth grade yentas behind her.  Miriam 
> said, "Do you think the reject with the rat's nest on her head wearing her 
> home for displaced moths will show up?"
>
> Ruthie nastily answered, "I don't think she'd have the nerve to socialize 
> with civilized society.  B'nos isn't a place for rejects."
>
> Chavy's temper flared.  "Don't you have anything else to talk about?  What 
> bothers you about a girl you don't know?  Life contains a lot of hard 
> lessons.  Someday you'll find that out."  The two of them returned her 
> dirty look before going to hang up their coats.
>
> Chavy entered the school auditorium, already half full for the Rabbi's 
> lecture.  To her surprise Pessi sat alone in the back.  She saw the 
> overgrown hair, ugly shoes, and sad eyes.  Chavy wondered about this girl 
> who arrived at school just as the bell rang and always left when the first 
> dismissal bell sounded without a word to anyone.  During lunch she sat 
> reciting verses from her Psalm book saying nothing to any of the girls. 
> Gossips like Miriam and Ruthie entertained themselves with Pessi Goldberg 
> jokes, but most girls tried to get Pessi involved with the mainstream 
> student body.  When it was obvious they failed, the feeling became pity.
>
> Now Chavy observed the brunt of jokes by the narrow minds and object of 
> pity for most of the girls, feeling bewildered.  Well, the bewilderment 
> had to stop and once and for all she had to make contact with this 
> mysterious girl.  She never remembered seeing Pessi before on Shabbos. 
> The contrast between Pessi's clothes and the others was glaring.  While 
> most girls dressed up for Shabbos, Pessi wore a simple skirt and sweater 
> appropriate for the weekday.  Pessi sat reading the same Psalm book she 
> read all week.  Chavy knew the time had come to jump over Pessi's self 
> constructed barrier.
>
> With fortified convictions she approached her classmate.  "Good Shabbos, 
> Pessi."
>
> "Good Shabbos, Chavy.  I'm waiting for Rabbi Goldberg.  I need some of the 
> emotional support he always gives."  Pessi returned to her book, signaling 
> the end of the conversation.    Chavy never remembered Pessi communicating 
> more than a cursory greeting until now.
>
> Determined to help her classmate Chavy said, "Pessi, come sit with the 
> class."
>
> Pessi raised her clear blue eyes.  "I'm fine right here."  She lowered her 
> eyes to her book, again conveying the end of the conversation.
>
> Though an assertive girl who always managed to control any situation she 
> found herself in, Chavy felt intimidated by Pessi who exhibited a certain 
> inner strength she couldn't match.   Baffled, she sat down near the girl, 
> trying to think of what she could say to at least entice her to join the 
> group.  "Pessi, you're a nice girl, but you don't talk to anyone."
>
> "My life is different. I have nothing in common with any of you."  Pessi's 
> attention returned to her book.
>
> Chavy stared at the girl praying from her Psalm book.  Pessi could be very 
> pretty if she had a haircut and nicer clothes.  Her blue eyes, outlined by 
> dark, long, luxurious lashes, seemed sad.  Chavy wondered what lay under 
> this façade.
>
> Both girls were sixteen, but she had never seen Pessi at a school social 
> event or class birthday party.  She had to try one more time.  "Pessi, we 
> want to be your friend.  Please come sit with us."
>
> "Chavy, I'm here for the Rabbi's lecture, and have to go when it's over. I 
> don't have time to stay for refreshments."
>
> "All I'm asking you to do is sit with us.  I already told my brother I'm 
> not coming back to make Sudat shlishit for him.  I don't feel like it. 
> How about it?  Come sit with us, stay for refreshments, and I'll go back 
> to help you with whatever you have to do."
>
> In a soft voice Pessi answered, "I don't want to impose."
>
> The well-rehearsed Chavy shot back, "I don't want to go back to my 
> brothers today.  I'll go home with you and call my father after Shabbos to 
> pick me up."
>
> Chavy was good.  Pessi felt herself giving in.    She smiled for the first 
> time.   "All right, Chavy.  Let's go sit with the others."
>
> The tall girls reached the front of the auditorium just as the Rabbi with 
> his salt and pepper beard started towards the podium.
>
> The audience turned their undivided attention to Rabbi Goldberg, but no 
> one turned greater concentration to the speaker than Pessi.
>
> Today the theme of the lecture encompassed the difficult things confronted 
> by people, and how individuals should perceive challenging situations.
>
> "If someone isn't well we look at that as unfortunate.  It's terrible to 
> see someone suffer with illness.  As Jewish people we're told to say 
> Psalms with the hope they recover.  But          what happens if they 
> don't recover?  What happens if we said our Tehillim, and they pass away, 
> Heaven forbid, anyway?  Should we think our prayers weren't answered? 
> No."  The Rabbi looked straight at Pessi and Chavy noticed his focus. "It 
> has nothing to do with us.  Let me try to bring it down to a more 
> comprehensible level.
>
> "Let's say I bring to one of you high school girls a blueprint from the 
> best architect in the country.  He has drawn plans for the biggest, best 
> building this country has ever seen.  You're high school girls and, to the 
> best of my knowledge, none of you ever studied architecture."  The girls 
> giggled before he continued.  "So, I go to your desk, put down the drawing 
> and ask what you think.  What are you supposed to say?  You have no idea 
> how to evaluate such diagrams."  The girls wondered where he was going 
> with this analogy. "Why are the heating pipes over there?  Why are there 
> no windows on that wall?  Considering the best architect in the country 
> drew the plan wouldn't it make sense he knew what he was doing?  The 
> architect knew how different forces worked together to make the building a 
> viable one.  You see girls, you have no right interpreting the architect's 
> drawing or expressing an opinion.  Only someone of equal stature to the 
> architect has that right.
>
> "The Almighty is the architect of the world.  Only He knows if something 
> is good or bad.  Because we aren't on His level we can't objectively judge 
> what He does.  As with the blueprint, we can say the windows look better 
> on the left rather than the right, but the architect knows about the 
> airflow in the building, and how the other infrastructures will work 
> together.  We don't know architecture or understand the blueprint of the 
> world.  But as the customer trusts the architect, we trust the Almighty 
> because only He knows what is best."
>
> Pessi turned closer attention to him with tears streaming down her face. 
> The Rabbi continued to look straight at Pessi.  Chavy guessed he was a 
> family friend and understood whatever haunted Pessi.  What was behind it?
>
>  "We can say we're saying Tehillim for the sick and, Heaven forbid, they 
> pass away.  Weren't our prayers good enough?  We know they were, but what 
> the Almighty knows is good isn't always what we think of as acceptable. 
> In the end we don't even know how to judge good as it pertains to 
> individual situations.  In short, girls, there are no answers.  We know 
> our Father in heaven doesn't intentionally hurt his children."
>
> Chavy noticed the Rabbi continuing to speak directly to a sobbing Pessi. 
> If only Chavy understood her problem perhaps there would be something she 
> could do.
>
> The Rabbi concluded, "Our responsibility is to show our Father we love Him 
> as we carry out His commandments, religious obligations, with our 
> heartfelt joy.  Before I leave I want each of you to take your Tehillim 
> book and say two Psalms for each of these people who aren't well. 
> Hopefully, our prayers will be heard and these people will be granted a 
> speedy and complete recovery."  He read three names using the Hebrew name 
> of the person followed by the Hebrew name of their mother.  Pessi blinked 
> back tears and opened the book.  A short while later the Rabbi said, "Good 
> Shabbos, girls" indicating the end of the lecture.
>
> The girls headed for the lunchroom where a beautiful dessert buffet 
> awaited them. Beside Chavy Pessi said, "I have a question for the Rabbi. 
> Be right back."
>
> Chavy's love for delectable goodies led her to the beautiful array of 
> pastries.  She spotted fruit on the other table and reluctantly took a 
> plate of the colorful, but less fattening food.
>
> Chavy glanced at Pessi talking to Rabbi Goldberg.  She must have had a 
> simple question.  She spent only a minute with the Rabbi before heading 
> back to Chavy.
>
> Pessi picked up a pastry.  "These pastries are great!"
>
> "You're so skinny you could probably eat the whole table and never show 
> it.  I have weight to lose so I stick to fruit.  Have some, it's good."
>
> Pessi laughed, reaching for another pastry.  "Chavy, I have to get going. 
> My mother isn't well."
>
> "No problem.  I can eat only so much fruit."
>
> When they finished eating Pessi and Chavy headed for the coat room under 
> the watchful gazes of Miriam and Ruthy.
>
> Pessi wondered if she was making the right move.  How come she decided to 
> leave the school with Chavy today?  Was she proving that despite her 
> strong resolve she needed someone?  Absolutely not!  She predicted that by 
> Monday Chavy would be totally bored with her and both of them would return 
> to their own corner of the world.  That would be all the proof she needed 
> to show her mother that she didn't need anyone else in her life.
>
> Pessi lived some distance from the school.  On the streets they traveled 
> Chavy didn't see any of the sights she associated with Shabbos afternoon 
> in her neighborhood.
>
> Pessi clung to her pride, still not completely sure about letting another 
> girl into her life.  She glanced at Chavy's beautiful gray wool coat with 
> black velvet collar and cuffs.  She remembered how it felt to be wearing 
> such a fine garment, but that was in the past.
>
> Chavy felt Pessi's discomfort.  She tried chatting about school 
> activities, upcoming tests and the weather.  Pessi wanted to discuss 
> classes and course work.
>
> Chavy still believed Trigonometry to be an obscure planet, but in her soft 
> voice Pessi discussed it with the ease Chavy spoke of her favorite foods.
>
> Fifteen minutes later they arrived.  Like others in the neighborhood the 
> small, run-down house appeared as if it had seen better days.  Chavy 
> didn't care.  Over the years she had been friends with girls from the 
> biggest and best homes and others from houses like this.  She didn't 
> choose her friends according to their zip codes.
>
> The two girls entered Pessi's dingy foyer.     Immediately a round faced 
> little boy ran to her. "Good Shabbos, Pessi!"
>
> Pessi picked him up asking, "Moshe, did you take care of Mommy?"
>
> His expression turned serious. "Mommy read me a book.
>
> "I'm sure she enjoyed that.  Let's go see her."
>
> On the sofa in the dining room lay Pessi's mother, a gaunt and obviously 
> very ill woman.  Pessi gave her mother a kiss before stooping to pick up 
> her blanket from the floor. She lovingly spread it over her.  "Good 
> Shabbos, Mommy.  This is Chavy Levy from school.  Tatty said she could 
> come home with me."
>
> "It's a pleasure to meet you, Chavy."
>
> Chavy hoped her shock didn't show.  The Rabbi was Pessi's father?  "It's 
> so nice to meet you, Mrs. Goldberg."
>
> "How did Tatty's lecture go, Pessi?"
>
> A bell rang in Chavy's mind.  Whatever was in the Rabbi's speech today had 
> been planned to address an issue in his daughter's life.  Gazing at the 
> emaciated woman on the couch wearing a pretty scarf on her head Chavy 
> began to understand the message.
>
> Pessi's eyes darted from her mother to Chavy.  "Chavy didn't know my 
> father is Rabbi Goldberg.  I never told anyone.  The lecture was one of 
> the best he ever gave."
>
> "Why did you keep your father's identity a secret?"
>
> "I feel better being a private person."
>
> "Even though people know who your father is, you can still be a private 
> person.  Could you please set out sudat shlishit before Tatty gets home?"
>
> Pessi chose to ignore her mother's latest prelude to a fight.  "Sure. 
> I'll do it now."
>
> After arriving home Rabbi Goldberg greeted their guest before turning to 
> his wife. "Shayna, can I help you to the table?"
>
> "I would like that, thank you."
>
> The Rabbi supported his wife the short distance from the sofa to the 
> table.  He then said, "Everybody can go and wash."
>
> Moshe brought a bowl and cup of water for his mother to ritually wash her 
> hands.  Mrs. Goldberg was too weak to wash at the sink with everyone else.
>
> In the tiny kitchen with doors falling off cabinets Chavy asked Pessi, 
> "Can you come to my house after Shabbos if I help you clean up?  My father 
> can pick us up."
>
> "I'll ask."  Back at the table the Rabbi said the blessing on the bread 
> and they all took a bite from their roll.  Pessi asked, "Tatty, Chavy 
> wants to know if I can go to her house after Shabbos.  Can I?"
>
> Mrs. Goldberg immediately answered, "Go, dear.  It's good for you to get 
> out." Rabbi Goldberg added, "You can go if you have a ride home."
>
> "I'll ask my father" Chavy said, "But it shouldn't be a problem."
>
> "In that case I give my permission.  Have a good time."
>
> Two dark haired teenage boys with small beards entered the house.  Pessi 
> said, "Those are my brothers."
>
> Chavy glanced at the boys headed for the kitchen to wash in preparation 
> for their meal.
>
> Avi Goldberg heard his father say, "Chavy, your father and I are very 
> close friends.  I know Rabbi Levy for many years."
>
> Avi stifled his laughter.  So his best friend Yigal Levy's sister was 
> Pessi's new friend?  He already agreed with all the complaints about her. 
> Why did Pessi pick up such a pain in the neck?
>
> After a brief talk by the Rabbi on the week's Torah reading Chavy quietly 
> asked Pessi, "Why did you keep your father's identity a secret?"
>
> Pessi thought about the giant plunge she had taken, wondering if she 
> should share anything more about her life.  Seeing the sincere expression 
> in Chavy's eyes convinced her.  "Goldberg is a very common name.  No one 
> knows except you now.  I'm happier being anonymous."
>
> The two girls said the blessing after the meal before going into the 
> dinette.
>
> Pessi leaned forward and started in a low voice.  "My mother has cancer. 
> She's getting chemo once a week, but her reports aren't good.  We moved to 
> Jenna ten months ago to be closer to better hospitals.  My father used to 
> have a big congregation and good job, but since moving here he hasn't been 
> successful.  I wear weekday clothes on the Sabbath because my last Shabbos 
> outfit doesn't fit.
>
> "I didn't want to get close to the girls at school.  They look at my 
> disgusting hair, inappropriate clothes and don't want that either." 
> Chavy's eyes remained riveted on Pessi.
>
> "I'm so nervous about my mother that all I do is go to school, keep up 
> this house, help my mother and family, and pray.  My father gave the 
> speech today for me.  I love my mother and can't face what's happening."
>
> Chavy wondered how Pessi dealt with all these challenges.
>
> "You're the first girl I brought home from school since moving to Jenna. 
> My parents always say they want me to have friends, but I'm ashamed of our 
> situation.  I prefer being alone with my problems rather than being the 
> object of pity or ridicule.  This issue has been a source of conflict 
> between my mother and me."
>
> "Pessi, if you hung up a few curtains with some pictures this place 
> wouldn't be half bad."
>
> "We can't afford curtains, and don't have any pictures.  We had paintings 
> where we lived before, but Tatty sold them for Mommy's medical care.  The 
> drapes in the old house were custom made so we left them."
>
> "My mother has a closet full of curtains.  Every time she sees a sale she 
> replaces ours.  I have some clothes I got too fat for.  I'll show them to 
> you later.  Don't be ashamed.  None of us lives in a palace.
>
> "You may not be aware of it, but there's Chesed at school.  As you know 
> this group does community service.  They can come and help you out a few 
> times a week.  I know the girl in charge of it. I'll discuss it with her 
> tomorrow."
>
> "Don't talk to her, Chavy.  I'm ashamed.  My beautiful mother is so sick 
> and looks terrible."
>
> "Don't be ashamed.  There's nothing wrong with you. When your mother 
> recovers she'll look better."
>
> Pessi started crying, arousing Chavy's concern.  "Pessi, I didn't mean to 
> upset you."
>
> "The doctors say now Mommy won't get any better.  They want to stop her 
> therapy."
>
> Chavy put her arm around Pessi's shoulders.  From what little she 
> understood about cancer, she knew that when a doctor said a person 
> wouldn't get any better and stopped the treatment it didn't mean they 
> expected good news.
>
> "We all know it's the end.  My mother is happy you came over today.  She's 
> been telling me for a long time I need to find friends.  I tried to ignore 
> it because I have too much to do and don't want anyone to know how poor we 
> are."
>
> "Don't worry about what the others think.  Tonight we're raiding my 
> mother's curtain closet.  Tomorrow after school we go to work."  They 
> smiled at each other.  Pessi had a friend for the first time in years.
>
> Chavy called her father after Shabbos.  He agreed to pick them up and 
> bring Pessi back later.
>
> Chavy approached the sofa.  "Thank you for a wonderful Shabbos, Mrs. 
> Goldberg."
>
> "The pleasure is all ours, Chavy.  It's wonderful to see Pessi with a girl 
> her age.  My little one, Suri, is at a friend's now, but Pessi stays home 
> to do everything I should be doing around here."
>
> "Mommy!  I told you I help you because I love you.  Don't insinuate I'm 
> something exceptional when I'm just doing what I want."
>
> Pessi turned and led the way to the foyer.
>
> Back at Chavy's Yigal stood in the kitchen with a dishtowel over his arm 
> glaring at his sister.  "I'll get you for this, Chavy Levy!  This is cruel 
> and unusual punishment! Mommy felt that since my mouth caused you to not 
> come right home I deserved this horrible fate.  Our dear sister Chumy 
> insisted I dry.  It should be illegal to have little sisters!"
>
> "Yigal, when you find yourself a good wife I'll help you pack your bags."
>
> Pessi joined the laughter unable to remember the last time she laughed 
> from genuine happiness.
>
> Yigal turned to Pessi.  "Is Avi Goldberg your brother?"
>
> "Yes.  Do you know him?"
>
> "Sure.  We go to Yeshiva together.  I tell him about my pain in the neck 
> sister, but he insists his sister's a doll.  Can you teach my sister to be 
> a doll?"
>
> "My brothers look at me as a doll because we treat each other with 
> respect.  Respect works two ways."
>
> "Yigal, after you learn from the Goldberg boys how to treat a good sister 
> perhaps Pessi can teach me a few things.  Until then, cut the 
> complaining."
>
> Chumy said, "Back to work, Yigal.  Only a few dishes to go."
>
> Mrs. Levy, a tall lady whose daughters bore her winning smile came to 
> greet Pessi.  Chavy asked, "Mommy, you know all those curtains you have 
> hanging in the closet?"
>
> "Yes, dear.  Why?"
>
> "Can we go through them to choose some for Pessi's house?"
>
> "Sure.  I'm sure Mrs. Goldberg will enjoy them."
>
> Bassie Levy visited Shayna Goldberg every week since the family moved to 
> Jenna and they became good friends, but Bassie knew the extent of her 
> illness.  Last week she confided they were stopping treatment.  Everyone 
> knew what that meant.
>
> Downstairs the girls started going through the closet.  In time they came 
> back with curtains and a few paintings.  Mrs. Levy approved everything 
> before the two headed up to Chavy's room.
>
> Chavy smiled at Pessi.  "You're a very pretty girl.  All you need is a 
> good haircut.  I cut Chumy's and some of my friends' hair all the time.  I 
> enjoy doing it and they always come out of my bathroom looking great.  Can 
> I do yours?"
>
> "If it's not too much trouble, I'd love it.  I can't remember the last 
> time I had a good haircut."
>
> In the upstairs bathroom she took her scissors and began working her 
> magic.  Once done she stood behind Pessi admiring the image in the mirror. 
> "Pessi, you have the darkest, thickest hair I ever saw.  You'll be the 
> envy of every girl in the school."
>
> "When my hair's properly cut it's my best feature."
>
> No it's not.  Those beautiful blue eyes with your dark hair are an 
> unbeatable match."
>
> "This feels great.  Thank you."
>
> In her bedroom Chavy took two outfits from her closet. "Here are two good 
> Shabbos outfits that don't fit anymore.  If they fit they're yours. 
> Here's a pair of black shoes I outgrew.  They're in perfect condition. 
> Want to try them on?"
>
> Pessi gazed at the lovely clothing.  Her jaw settled into the same 
> stubborn line Chavy witnessed earlier.  "I feel strange accepting these 
> beautiful things.  I never took charity before."
>
> "This isn't charity.    I don't want to keep pushing the hangers that 
> represent the way I used to be."
>
> Pessi took a long while to make up her mind.  Chavy thought she would 
> leave the clothes on the bed.
>
> Eventually Pessi took off her sweater and pulled on the top to a black and 
> white outfit that matched the pretty black pumps.  The shoes fit 
> perfectly.  Seeing her reflection in the mirror she couldn't believe the 
> difference.  She tried on the other stylish gray and pink wool outfit.
>
> Chavy sighed.  "I wish I could be as skinny as you."
>
> "Don't be silly, Chavy.  You look fine the way you are!"
>
> "That's very nice of you, but I can read a scale."
>
> Pessi sat on one of the beds observing Chavy's attractive room with white 
> walls and pretty blue plush carpet.  She turned back to Chavy.  "At first 
> I believed that by Monday morning you would be sick of me and my problems, 
> and we would have both crept back into our own lives.  But I was wrong.  I 
> know you aren't turned off at our run-down house or my beautiful mother 
> who looks awful now.  I knew from the beginning you didn't take a look at 
> my inappropriate clothes and figure they told my whole story.
>
> "I'm familiar with most of the girls.  Tatty learns the holy books with 
> many of their fathers.  A lot of their mothers visit mine.    Since moving 
> to Jenna I insisted that they not tell anyone I'm their daughter.  I 
> didn't need pity from the entire town.
>
> "If I didn't have to go straight home after school, I might be willing to 
> make friends with the girls.  My mother has been trying to get me to do 
> that.  We argue about it constantly. I have the right to run my own life, 
> but she feels that I'm too much of a loner.   I love her, but this is one 
> topic we'll never agree on.  I'm just more comfortable being a hermit."
>
> "Are you really comfortable like that?"
>
> "I don't know right now.  Let's see how it goes.  I can be social with the 
> other girls at school, but our relationships will end at the school door."
>
> Chavy ignored her last statement.  "I want Chesed to help you out.  You 
> need and deserve it.  I'll just say one of your parents isn't well so the 
> responsibility for everything is on your shoulders."
>
> "In spite of our poverty, I'm a proud person and never took such generous 
> charity."
>
> "It's not charity.  Chesed girls go out to help others all week long. 
> People say they need help and we send them girls."
>
> Pessi remained quiet for a long time.  Chavy thought she would refuse her 
> suggestion.
>
> "I could use the help.  Thank you."  For the first time in five years 
> Pessi admitted needing anyone.  It shocked her to realize this big step 
> felt mighty good.
>
> "Tomorrow in school I'll try to be more a part of the class.  I'll say my 
> Tehillim, but will also try to talk to the other girls."
>
> "For the fall holidays we attended your father's Synagogue.  My mother 
> mentioned our fathers were classmates in Yeshiva.  Did you know that?"
>
> "He never told me their relationship dated back to their days in school."
>
> Mrs. Levy knocked on the door.  "Girls, Tatty can take Pessi home now."
>
> Chavy helped Pessi take everything out to the car.
>
> At home Pessi's mother lay on her couch and her father was studying the 
> Holy books in his office.  When she entered the room Mrs. Goldberg stared 
> at her.  "Pessi!  You're gorgeous!  Who cut your hair?"
>
> "Chavy.  She cuts her sister Chumy's hair all the time.  What do you 
> think?" She turned around to give her mother the full effect.
>
> "I love it.  You must keep it up."
>
> Her mother noticed the bags she carried.  "What do you have there?"
>
> "Mrs. Levy buys curtains every time she sees a sale so has lots of them in 
> the basement.  She gave me some to try to make this place look better. 
> They also gave me a few pictures."
>
> "I'll get Avi and Yitzy to hang up rods and picture hooks tomorrow.  What 
> else do you have?"
>
> "Chavy gained some weight so doesn't fit into a few of her outfits. 
> There's also a pair of shoes she outgrew."
>
> Mrs. Goldberg admired everything. "They're all beautiful, Pessi.  Wear 
> everything well, dear."
>
> Pessi kissed her mother good night and headed for her room.  Shayna knew 
> Pessi withdrew from the world of other girls because of their poverty and 
> her illness.  She would take her guilt to her grave.
>
>
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