[stylist] synopsis assistance please

[Judith Bron]

Anita, This statement bothers me:
"Cody must devise a plan that will keep the blind stranger who shows up at 
their house demanding
Joey go to a special camp for blind kids from dragging Joey away."
Does anyone know of a camp, school or any other democratic institution 
"dragging" a kid anywhere?  Do Catholic Priests drag Catholic kids off to a 
Catholic camp?  I would think the man from the blind camp first approached 
the parents and discussed it with them.  Also, I think the parents are being 
negligent towards Coty for not explaining to him why his brother became 
blind.  If the accident was indeed Coty's fault they must have recognized 
this.  From your summary no one is throwing Coty anywhere.  I think you have 
the right idea, but this piece needs more work.  Good luck, Judith
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Anita Adkins" <aadkins7 at verizon.net>
To: "Writer's Division Mailing List" <stylist at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Tuesday, January 18, 2011 11:33 AM
Subject: [stylist] synopsis assistance please


> Hello everyone,
>
> I have written a short story, and one of the publisher's I am interested 
> in submitting too requires a cover letter. Upon some basic research, I 
> have learned that a cover letter should contain a synopsis of the story. 
> My question is should this synopsis sound the same as it would if I were 
> giving it to children? For ex., in the one I am pasting below, you will 
> see the words wrong belief. At first, I had written misconception here, 
> but young children may not know what that word means. Any ideas and 
> suggestions are appreciated. Thanks in advance for any assistance. Sorry 
> about it sounded as if it is a link. I am not sure why it chose to do 
> this.
>
> It's more than just brotherly love that motivates Cody Dallas to protect 
> and defend his twin brother. In Cody's mind, the accident that left Joey 
> blind wouldn't have occurred if it weren't for Cody's selfish actions. His 
> duty is to suffer any consequences this horrible situation presents, and 
> most of all, to do whatever it takes to keep his brother safe. As a 
> result, Cody must devise a plan that will keep the blind stranger who 
> shows up at their house demanding Joey go to a special camp for blind kids 
> from dragging Joey away. The adults in Cody's life keep telling him that 
> the camp is just what Joey needs to live a happy and healthy life. But, 
> Cody's fears and wrong beliefs about the abilities of the blind combined 
> with his guilt are too strong for him to ignore.
>
>
>
> Anita
>
> Remember, Jesus Loves You.
> Anita Adkins
> 81 E. Mechanic ST
> APT 207
> Frostburg, MD 21532
> p: 301-689-5212
> c: 301-876-8669
> aadkins7 at verizon.net
> _______________________________________________
> Writers Division web site:
> http://www.nfb-writers-division.org <http://www.nfb-writers-division.org/>
>
> stylist mailing list
> stylist at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/stylist_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for 
> stylist:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/stylist_nfbnet.org/jbron%40optonline.net
>