[stylist] Writers' Roundtable, a chapter for your amusement and critique

Fri Jun 3 19:47:51 UTC 2011

Hi Lori,
Thanks for your feedback; I'm glad you were interested in reading more. Your
adult writing class sounds like a real challenge. Tell us how it is going. I
think that poetry can really loosen a group up. Somewhere in each of us,
there's a poem waiting to get out. Nowadays, so much of poetry is channeled
into music, and people -- whatever they may say about disliking poetry --
all seem to have a favorite song that they like for the words.
Donna

-----Original Message-----
From: stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of LoriStay at aol.com
Sent: Thursday, June 02, 2011 9:38 PM
To: stylist at nfbnet.org
Subject: Re: [stylist] Writers' Roundtable,a chapter for your amusement and
critique

Nicely done.   I was interested to read more, which to me is a sign of the 
success of a piece.   I have to teach a writing class starting Monday, and 
am thinking of starting with poetry, to the chagrin of the students (all 
adults).   
Lori
In a message dated 6/2/11 5:02:05 PM, penatwork at epix.net writes:

> 
> 
> I've been going through my manuscript yet again, after some comments from 
> my
> sister, and it occurred to me that you might enjoy this particular chapter
> without having read what comes before. Though the book is a fantasy, the
> school stuff is rooted in realism. I'll copy it below and attach a Word 
> doc,
> so everyone's covered.
> 
> 
> 
> Just a bit of background . The main characters are two 14-year-old 
> refugees
> from the Isle of Adiaphora, Abigail and Baggy. This is the first day of 
> the
> summer term and their first class together. Abigail is hoping she'll learn
> Baggy's real first name when attendance is taken. Their classmate
> Christopher was involved in a fight before school. The teacher, Professor
> Thornhammer, is the only teacher at the Plumkettle Learning Center who
> insists upon being called "Professor." He's Abby's advisor as well as the
> head of the photography department.
> 
> 
> 
> Enjoy and let me know what you think.
> 
> Donna
> 
> 
> 
> Chapter Twenty-Seven
> 
> Writers' Roundtable
> 
> 
> 
> Word count: 1268
> 
> 
> 
> Second-floor-west was quiet and empty when the two friends headed for the
> closed door at the end of the hall. Once inside the photography 
> department,
> Baggy spotted students heading into the westmost of the two classrooms on
> the south wall and followed.
> 
> The room resembled an elongated dining room with a round table in the
> center. It would have seated ten, but the chairs on either side of the
> teacher's had been removed. There was a desk off to the right and a sofa 
> on
> the left. Curtains blocked most of the light from the south-facing 
> windows.
> 
> "Hey, Baggy," said Christopher, who was standing near the sofa, "I didn't
> know you were a writer!"
> 
> "I'm not," Baggy grumbled as he approached the small boy.
> 
> "Me neither," Christopher said with more apprehension, "They m-made me 
> take
> it."
> 
> An older boy with long dreadlocks was seated at the table on the right 
> side
> closest to the front. A red-headed girl with a big smile bounced into the
> room.
> 
> "Hi, Les," she said to the boy, who raised his hand slightly in
> acknowledgement, "I'm Gabriele," she added turning to the others, "I've
> noticed you and your dog. He's beautiful. I'm sorry, I don't know any of
> your names."
> 
> Abby recognized her voice and accent as the girl who stuck up for
> Christopher in the bathroom earlier. They all introduced themselves. 
> Abigail
> sat between Christopher and Baggy on the left side of the table. Gabriele
> hurried to the front of the room and opened the curtains.
> 
> "Oh, it's so nice today," she moaned, "I can't wait to get outside!"
> 
> She was about to sit down when she noticed another student entering the
> class. It was Tommy.
> 
> "Good morning!" he said smiling.
> 
> Baggy was on his feet, removing the chair next to him to make room for 
> Tom's
> wheelchair. Tom paused before moving into place to gaze into Gabriele's
> green eyes.
> 
> "Did anyone ever tell you," he said softly, "that you have gorgeous eyes?"
> 
> She blushed and finally managed to say, "I'm Gabriele and this is Lester
> Fields."
> 
> She was about to introduce the others, when she stopped in mid sentence.
> Abby heard heavy booted steps and looked back.
> 
> "Hi Laurel," said Gabriele, "We're all just getting acquainted."
> 
> "Excellent," said the girl with a cheerful though mischievous smile. She 
> was
> dressed in jeans and a blue work shirt, her shoulder-length brown hair 
> tied
> back with a Plumkettle kerchief, "I'm Laurel Hall. I like your dog."
> 
> After greeting Tom, Baggy and Christopher, she sat next to Les, and the 
> two
> began talking quietly.
> 
> Thornhammer arrived a few minutes late wearing his usual black jeans and
> shirt. He strode to the front of the room without looking at them and 
> closed
> the curtains. He placed a stack of papers on the desk. Pacing back and
> forth, he introduced himself to the class. He did not, to Abigail's 
> chagrin,
> take attendance.
> 
> "This is Writers' Roundtable and I am Professor Thornhammer. Mr. Fields," 
> he
> said, nodding to Les, "Miss Hall, Miss Stein, you have all been in my 
> class
> before. For the rest of you" -- he looked to his right unsmiling and his
> gaze rested on Christopher -- "This course is designed not only to help 
> you
> refine the craft of writing, but to help you develop a backbone about what
> you do write. All of you" -- he looked around at each of them -- "are from
> Adiaphora, and as such I'm assuming that you have experienced the world in

> a
> more poignant fashion than most Plumkettle students, who have come to us
> from more, shall we say, settled backgrounds." After pausing to allow them
> to absorb this information, he resumed his pacing and continued, "Now, 
> "Who
> can tell us what the first form of literature was?"
> 
> "Comic books," whispered Baggy.  Everyone heard and everyone giggled,
> accept Thornhammer who shot him a dirty look.
> 
> "Anyone else?" he continued.
> 
> Lester raised his hand slightly and said without waiting, "Poetry."
> 
> "Precisely," said Thornhammer taking his seat at the head of the table," 
> We
> traditionally begin our classes with quotes about writing from respected
> historical figures. Mr. Fields, if you would get us started."
> 
> Abby felt her heart race in anticipation of reading her own quote. She 
> could
> hear Christopher squirming in his seat. Lester Fields showed no emotion as
> he opened a spiral notebook.
> 
> "Yes, it would be my pleasure" he began in a strong calm voice, "This is
> from a preface to Lyrical Ballads by the father of the Romantic era of
> British poetry, William Wordsworth.  'All good poetry is the spontaneous
> overflow of powerful feelings: it takes its origin from emotion recolle
> cted
> in tranquility.'."
> 
> After a dramatic pause during which Abigail supposed that they were to
> reflect on Lester's quote, Thornhammer called on Christopher. He fumbled
> with his papers and coughed before proceeding in a faint voice.
> 
> "A p-poet's work," he said before coughing again, "is to n-name the
> unnamable, to point at fr-frauds, to, to take sides, st-start arguments,
> shape the world, and stop it going to.to  sleep."
> 
> "By?" Thornhammer prompted.
> 
> "S-Salman ruh-Rushdie."
> 
> "And, Miss Jones?"
> 
> Abigail's body jerked involuntarily. She had been sidetracked by the
> alarming, almost militant view of poetry in Christopher's quote.
> 
> "The ancient Greek philosopher Plato," she said, struggling to refocus on
> the task at hand, "wrote, 'Poetry comes nearer to vital truth than
> history.'"
> 
> "Thank you," said Thornhammer getting to his feet and pacing, "History 
> tells
> us what people did; poetry tells us how they felt about it.
> 
> Abigail fumbled in her pack and hurriedly set her digital book player to
> record. What followed was a lecture on poetic forms and imagery.
> 
> "Now," Thornhammer concluded, "for your first assignment, due next 
> Tuesday,
> you will each write a poem-"
> 
> Baggy, who hated poetry, groaned. This caused Abigail and Tommy much
> consternation as they attempted to stifle giggles.
> 
> "I don't care what type of poetry it is," Thornhammer continued, "You can
> write us a sonnet, free verse, a limerick, a haiku.whatever form of poetry
> strikes your fancy.  What I do care about is that it means something to 
> you,
> that it doesn't take up more than one page, and" -- he paused to pick up 
> the
> stack of papers from the desk -- "that you avoid using" -- he gestured 
> with
> the papers -- "any of these words."
> 
> As Thornhammer handed out the papers, Gabriele whispered, "He has a list 
> of
> words that he's banned."
> 
> "Take a moment to familiarize yourselves with this list.  I will not
> tolerate the use of these words in this class, not on paper and not in
> conversation."
> 
> When he reached Abby, Thornhammer pressed a stiff card into her hand. She
> fumbled with the card and after getting the Braille right-side up, read,
> "Professor Thornhammer's Banned Four-Letter Words." Her heart raced in
> anticipation of the words he might have included, but the list was a 
> simple
> one: Like, Sure, very, fine and just.
> 
> "Ooo!" said Gabriele, "there's a new one."
> 
> "Just?" whispered Laurel.
> 
> "For you in particular, Miss Hall," Thornhammer replied sternly.
> 
> Abby puzzled over the words trying to reason out why they would be banned.
> She understood that some kids said, "like" incessantly, but thought the 
> word
> had legitimate uses and wanted to demonstrate her awareness of this fact.
> 
> "But, sir," she began, and Thornhammer turned to face her, "Isn't l- . I
> mean this first one an accepted way of introducing a simile?"
> 
> Thornhammer did not answer immediately, giving Abby a moment to savor the
> possibility that he was about to praise her.
> 
> "Not," he said at last with heavy finality, "in this class."
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 

_______________________________________________
Writers Division web site:
http://www.nfb-writers-division.org <http://www.nfb-writers-division.org/>

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