[stylist] Haiku song lyrics

Thu Jun 16 20:50:19 UTC 2011

Donna... I had no idea what you would call it and that  seemed to fit 
so.... they are really nicely done and I may have to try a few of  those...  
That's the great thing about literature of any genre... we read  and we 
interpret.. we sometimes know exactly where the writer is coming from but  sometimes 
it hits close to home and we become the character and experience the  words 
in our own way!  At any rate.. so well done and I too would love to  hear 
it put to music... 
Myrna

In a message dated 6/16/2011 1:17:35 P.M. Central Daylight Time,  
penatwork at epix.net writes:

Hi  Myrna,
I love your term "interlocking Haiku." Rhyming Haiku just didn't say  it. 

I guess for me the flying thing is about rising above the worst of  our
experiences -- going on despite them. . I like the idea of the  absolution 
we
think we need, though from the subject's perspective, there  doesn't seem to
be an understanding of the difference between what we  "think" we need and
what we desperately need. The subject is seeking  forgiveness from the place
of someone who doesn't even feel recognized by  the one from which they seek
forgiveness. I think this is about as low a  place as you can come from and
still have the recognition that you know  that how ever bad you feel, you're
going to try again, and it's a detached  understanding of one's own
character, not a feeling of determination. Just  my thoughts. As you know,
poetry's power is to awaken in the reader things  that the poet had not
specifically foreseen. 
Donna

-----Original  Message-----
From: stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org  [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of  KajunCutie926 at aol.com
Sent: Tuesday, June 14, 2011 4:50 PM
To:  stylist at nfbnet.org
Subject: Re: [stylist] Haiku song lyrics

I love  the 'interlocking' haiku for lack of a  better word for it... I've  
done this with haiku before myself...  I love  this!  As  far as what it's 
about.... my interpretation may be different  from  your reality but when 
reading it I felt it was about the need to   fly... to shed the tethers of
cold 
(life, sadness, whatever) and  finding the  strength to spread the wings 
and 
seek the absolution we  think we need... I  probably am not close but poetry
is 
like  that... we put ourselves into the words  and make it our story... In  
any case.. this is wonderful  stuff!

In a message dated  6/13/2011 12:50:57 P.M. Central Daylight Time,  
penatwork at epix.net  writes:

Hi  Friends,

I probably should have waited till  November to pull this one  out, but 
since
we've been discussing Haiku  and who knows where any of us  will be in
November, I thought I'd  share it now. There are three verses of  2 Haiku
each. Each verse is  followed by a bridge which is one Haiku and a 5  
syllable
refrain.  You'll notice that I have employed a rhyme structure that  ties  
the
verse Haiku to each other and the bridges to each other, though   the
individual Haiku don't rhyme internally.

I don't   consider it perfect or done, so if you have any thoughts,   please
share.

Donna

Under These Gray  Skies

By  Donna W. Hill

1

Under these gray  skies

I bow down  to November

Holding out my  wings

Even though I  try

I can't seem to  remember

Why the caged bird  sings

O, Lord, forgive  me

I was once your  beloved

Don't you still know  me?

Under these gray  skies.

2

Under  these gray skies

I've been waiting  forever

For the seas to  part

Promises and  lies

Thwarting every  endeavor

Of this weary  heart

Stung by the salt  spray,

I pour over my  failures

Who could pardon  me?

Under these gray  skies.

3

Under  these gray skies

Nighttime closes  around me

As the winds  subside

Feeble  alibis

Serving just to confound  me

and my starless  guide

Morning will find  me

Reaching to the  horizon

Where the wild birds  fly

Under these gray   skies

###

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