[stylist] Another Try

[Jacobson, Shawn D]

Jackie

Thanks for looking at my haiku; they're fun to do and if you hit the right mood they can be beautiful.  I think you're right about the third line.

Shawn

-----Original Message-----
From: stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Jacqueline Williams
Sent: Saturday, October 22, 2011 7:49 PM
To: 'Writer's Division Mailing List'
Subject: Re: [stylist] Another Try

Shawn,
Just now read your Haiku. We are in fall now. Nice. You could consider
changing the third line to "to do the bagging.
I think "the bagging to do"
I know I'm way behind on these. Sorry.
Jackie is an inversion.

-----Original Message-----
From: stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of Jacobson, Shawn D
Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 11:50 AM
To: 'Writer's Division Mailing List'
Subject: Re: [stylist] Another Try

While we're on the subject of leaves:

Carrying my rake
I crunch through leafy mountains
The bagging to do.

-----Original Message-----
From: stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of Homme, James
Sent: Monday, October 17, 2011 2:45 PM
To: Writer's Division Mailing List
Subject: [stylist] Another Try

Blasted from on high,
leaves piled against my fence will
feed my spring garden.

Jim

Jim Homme,
Usability Services,
Phone: 412-544-1810.


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