[stylist] Is it heaven revised

Barbara Hammel poetlori8 at msn.com
Thu Jan 12 04:44:53 UTC 2012


Thank You.  It is now counted as a completed poem.  Thank all of you for 
helping me.
Barbara




A man who wants to lead the orchestra must turn his back on the crowd. --  
Max Lucado
-----Original Message----- 
From: Jacqueline Williams
Sent: Wednesday, January 11, 2012 9:54 PM
To: 'Writer's Division Mailing List'
Subject: Re: [stylist] Is it heaven revised

Barbara,
Yes, it is definitely better. It reads smoothly, more rhythmically, and it
is a good poem.
Good revising.
Jackie

-----Original Message-----
From: stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of Barbara Hammel
Sent: Saturday, January 07, 2012 9:23 PM
To: stylist at nfbnet.org
Subject: [stylist] Is it heaven revised

IS IT HEAVEN?



It'S January the fifth  today

And the thermometer says 62,

Are you sure that I'm in Iowa

And not in Thibodaux?



Or is it Heaven, after all,

Not Iowa any more?

Winter can't stay like this.

It'll return with a roar.



It's January the fifth today

And shirt sleeves are the wear,

For there's no hint of winter

Out in the sunny air.



Or is it Heaven, after all,

And did I actually die?

For this isn't winter in Iowa,

The snow should be piled high.



It's January the fifth today,

And my child thinks it's neat

That he can go outside and swing

In his jacket and bare feet.



Or is it Heaven, after all?

Please pinch me so I'll know

There are whispering  gale-force winds

And four feet of invisible snow.





I feel better about this.  What do you think now?

Barbara



A man who wants to lead the orchestra must turn his back on the crowd. --
Max Lucado
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