[stylist] November writing prompt on gratitude: poem

Tue Nov 13 01:51:41 UTC 2012

I like some of the untraditional verbage used and also appreciate how you
say you are struggling to find the words. It makes the whole thing make
more sense than it would if you claimed to have succeeded. Bravo on your
piece and your swim. Eve

On Mon, Nov 12, 2012 at 4:14 PM, Mary-Jo Lord <mjfingerprints at comcast.net>wrote:

> Hi Aine,
>
> I love your progression from beginning swimmer to competing.  I also like
> the way you are trying to work out what you want to say in the poem and you
> actually say that it has taken you five stanzas to get there.
>
> Mary-Jo
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: stylist [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Aine
> Kelly-Costello
> Sent: Monday, November 12, 2012 3:07 PM
> To: Writer's Division Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [stylist] November writing prompt on gratitude: poem
>
>  OK, I was debating whether to post this or not as it's sort of...
> personal, I guess, but it seems like everyone is pretty friendly here so I
> may as well give it a go.  :) It was a poem I wrote for my swim coach a
> couple weeks ago.  I'm retiring from the sport, after going to the
> Paralympics earlier this year.  Without going into great detail, we could
> say London didn't go as well as I'd have liked.  At least in my main event
> (100 back) I did come 6th, but not quite in a personal best time.  Anyway,
> it's pasted below and attached.
>
> ?
>
> Look
>
> You watched as thousands of tiny floppy forms learned To coordinate their
> arms and legs and fingers and toes Endlessly, as they earned Titles of
> tadpole and dolphin and shark.
> You encouraged hundreds of them.
>
> You watched as two of the sparks of life you love Slowly surpassed the work
> ethic expectations of their peers To become multiple record breakers, they
> learned fast To refine their own art and teach others.
> You were always there for both of them.
>
> You watched as you were handed down
> Three athletes with a "disability", and as we Insisted on attempting to
> prove our aquatic agility To anyone who might listen.
> You always listened to all of us.
>
> You watched as my hand touched the wall, the abrupt end To the main race of
> my career, with me Not wanting to settle for 6th best And admit defeat, nor
> celebrate success.
> You comforted me through all that fuss.
>
> I wish you hadn't watched
> As the final event I'd ever do
> Left everything good for the next time that wouldn't eventuate, I felt like
> I let the whole world down and somehow All you said was not to talk about
> it.
> I couldn't grasp how anyone could say that And not be ready to kill, so I
> asked and found out I'd upset you more for thinking you'd be forever mad.
> Now I know You'd forgive me even that.
>
> You have no choice but to watch
> As I read you this poem, and I realise
> I've thought of 5 full stanzas, but have yet To work out how to thank you;
> you're one of a few I can never repay.  To my relief though, I did at least
> surmise You'd have forgotten the debt, anyway.
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Chris Kuell" <ckuell at comcast.net
> To: "Stylist" <stylist at nfbnet.org
> Date sent: Tue, 6 Nov 2012 08:35:55 -0500
> Subject: [stylist] November writing prompt
>
> Hello, fellow writers.  Sorry about the delay, but we lost power and cable
> (hence no telephone) and heat during the storm, and didn't get it back
> until
> yesterday, seven days later.  And, just in the nick of time, since it's 22
> degrees out right now.  We had some limbs and trees down, and 2 phone poles
> snapped in half on my street, but compared to many people, we got off
> relatively easy.  Which brings me to this month's writing prompt.
>
> I think an appropriate theme for this prompt is 'gratitude'.  We all have
> much to be grateful for, and I'd like you to write a poem, essay, memoir
> piece or short story with the idea of gratitude in mind.  Any length, any
> style--I urge you to be creative.  For instance, I might write about a town
> called Gratitude, North Dakota...
>
> This is not meant to be a race.  If the muse hits and you hammer out
> something today, that's great.  But, if you are like me, it may take a week
> or two to write something, and then another week to edit and revise it.
> Part of the reason to do a prompt is to get your creative juices flowing,
> but also to practice your craft.  Post your responses by December first,
> although if you need a few extra days you won't be penalized.
>
> Finally, as people post their work, I urge everyone to read them and give
> constructive feedback.  We all want to be supportive, naturally, but I hope
> we also want to grow and improve as writers.  This happens in several ways,
> firstly by writing, but also by reading with a writer's mindset, always
> thinking--what works in this piece, and what doesn't? You will be amazed at
> how analyzing others writing improves your own.  But, I also caution you to
> look at the writing, and not the opinions expressed.  For example, if
> someone writes that Sarah Palin should really be president today, I
> disagree
> with the sentiment, but my feedback should only relate to the writing.
>  Look
> for pacing, point of view, tense shifts, run-on sentences, clunky sentences
> or phrases, and so on.  And of course, mention the things you liked about a
> piece--great imagery, solid dialogue, awesome symbolism, etc.
>
> Good luck, and again, it's a broad theme and there's no right or wrong way
> to approach it.  The most important thing is to write something.
>
> chris
>
>
>
>
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