[stylist] New story, on memory lanes

Fri Sep 14 19:45:59 UTC 2012

Yes, Shawn, the relics of the ancestors should never be touched or moved, or 
removed for where they are. They are sacred, as is the land itself.
The Kachinas are very interesting to learn about - they are sacred beings. 
Hopi culture is so very beautiful, and very different from Navajo culture. 
Each of the different Indian cultures is very specific and different. I was 
thinking Jackie would have more information for you since she used to work 
on a reservation. I taught NA culture, literature, and arts in the college 
and took students on trips to Arizona to learn first hand about the things 
they were learning in the classroom. My teaching was limited to Hopi and 
Navajo arts and literature though, and our course was built on the notion of 
what happens to a culture that has been colonized - that is why we chose 
Arizona for our course - we also did the same thing with Puerto Rico for 
many years - so students could begin to learn about colonization. Very 
interesting thing to study.

Lynda

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Jacobson, Shawn D" <Shawn.D.Jacobson at hud.gov>
To: "'Writer's Division Mailing List'" <stylist at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Friday, September 14, 2012 2:37 PM
Subject: Re: [stylist] New story, on memory lanes

> Linda
>
> Thank you so much for looking at this.  I knew I was weak on the Native 
> American thing, but wanted to bring it in.  I think my research got to 
> Wiccapedia and not much further.  Your advice will definitely be a help. 
> I will check out the web site (time and initiative permitting).
>
> I was on a tour of Monument Valley and Mystery Valley once; and the guide, 
> a Navajo, called the Kachina something completely different.  He also said 
> he no longer takes potshards out of the valley because the spirits made 
> him sick for doing so.
>
> Once again thanks.
>
> Shawn
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On 
> Behalf Of Lynda Lambert
> Sent: Thursday, September 13, 2012 12:02 PM
> To: Writer's Division Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [stylist] New story, on memory lanes
>
> Shawn, I read this yesterday.  It is a large project and well thought out.
>
> I can offer some advice:
> 1.)  Check the spelling of NA tribes, and
> 2.) do some research into relisious objects and customs.  It is L a k o t 
> a
> and K a c h i n a   and
>
> 3.)  do research on what the Kachina is and does for accuracy. Kachina are
> HOPI - Here's a good link for that:
> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hopi_Kachina_dolls
> Check out the other ones for accuracy, too.
>
> The different NS cultures are very distinctly DIFFERENT - different 
> customs,
> different world views, different fetishes, different art forms, etc.
>
> Also, the strongest tool a writer has is the "blue pencil" and that means 
> go
> through it and edit it down some more.
> 4.)  Edit it down - read it aloud - and then go back and edit it more.
>
> 5.)  Watch for repetition of words and go back and see if you can change
> some words so they are not repeating so often.
>
> Also,
> 6.)  go over your use of the semi-colon - ask yourself why  the semicolon
> used here in this place. Ask yourself lots of questions as you read 
> through
> this -
>
> I am not an editor, so perhaps someone else here IS and can give you
> additional help in getting this into shape.
>
> I have noticed that getting a helpful critique here seems to be something
> that seldom happens.  I hope others here will give you some help beyond 
> what
> I have offered.
>
> Perhaps, you can send it to the critique offer that came recently through
> this group?  Good luck with your piece - you certainly have put a great 
> deal
> of thought and effort into this.
>
>
>
> Lynda Lambert
>
>
>
>
>
> ----- Original Message ----- 
> From: "Jacobson, Shawn D" <Shawn.D.Jacobson at hud.gov>
> To: "'Writer's Division Mailing List'" <stylist at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Wednesday, September 12, 2012 1:48 PM
> Subject: [stylist] New story, on memory lanes
>
>
> Writer's division
>
> Attached (in WORD format) is my latest story, "On Memory Lanes".  It 
> started
> out being a Zenna Henderson People stories tribute and also became a 
> tribute
> to my grandpa who bowled a lot of small bowling tournaments in the 
> Midwest.
> If I've said anything wrong about native American culture (I do bring it 
> in
> some here), I apologize in advance.
>
> If anyone can't read this, please let me know and I will attach in the 
> body
> of my Email; it's 7,100 words, so a bit long for the body of an Email
> message (but will try if necessary).
>
> I hope you enjoy this, any comments (good or bad) please let me know.
>
> The best.
>
> Shawn Jacobson
> Mathematical Statistician
> Phone# (202)-475-8759
> Fax# (202)-485-0275
>
>
>
>
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>
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