[stylist] my next project

[Jacobson, Shawn D]

Myrna

That is an interesting insight.  I had not thought of that before, but it makes sense.

Shawn

-----Original Message-----
From: stylist [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of myrnaspoetry--- via stylist
Sent: Friday, December 19, 2014 9:55 AM
To: Julie J.; Writer's Division Mailing List
Subject: Re: [stylist] my next project

Julie, I like your approach. Yes, marriage, or any relationship, must have compromises no matter is one spouse has a disability or not. Yes, sometimes those compromises will involve whatever the disability is but that is what it is. Any relationship requires work but the advice I gave each of my children is this. LIKE your mate, who they are and what they are. You can love them with all your heart but you must like them too. If not you will always want to change them and that is your primary thought the relationship will struggle. I hope that makes sense. 
Myrna
Good luck with this project. 



> On Dec 19, 2014, at 4:51 AM, Julie J. via stylist <stylist at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> 
> Chris,
> 
> Yes, this exactly!  I don't intend to write a book on how to be a blind spouse, but more along the lines of using my own blindness experience as an example within a larger context.  There was quite a bit of interest in this topic, so I think I'm going to start jotting down my ideas and see where it goes.
> 
> My first thought was that marriage, or any long term intimate relationship, is not equal and is not a democracy.  It can't be.   There are two people, one votes yes and the other votes no.  In the end someone has to come out ahead and the other deals with it.   I don't think I've seen marriage talked about in quite this way.  Perhaps it's an idea to ponder further.
> 
> Thanks to all of you!  I will update as I progress...probably when I get stuck and need a fresh perspective! You guys are awesome!
> 
> Julie
> Courage to Dare: A Blind Woman's Quest to Train her Own Guide Dog is now available! Get the book here:
> http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00QXZSMOC
> Visit my new website on developing courage and living authentically:
> http://www.falling-up.com
> -----Original Message----- From: Chris Kuell via stylist
> Sent: Thursday, December 18, 2014 12:33 PM
> To: 'Robert Leslie Newman' ; 'Writer's Division Mailing List'
> Subject: Re: [stylist] my next project
> 
> Hi Julie,
> 
> Congrats again on your first book publication. And I'm not surprised that you are ready to go on to your next project. Personally, I like the marriage and relationship book idea. But, I'd suggest that the book not be about blindness or a blind partner, but rather focus on overcoming challenges, and creating an equality environment, which every relationship/marriage eventually deals with. There will be curveballs, and you need to know how to not get hurt by them. And, many relationships aren't equal, meaning one person feels like they do more, which always causes resentment and problems. This might be especially true for a person with a disability. However, it needen't be that way. In my house, for example, it's just easier for my sighted wife to do the food shopping. Sure, I can and have done it, but it's easier for her to do it. So while she's out doing that, I'm doing laundry or mopping the kitchen floor or scrubbing out the bathroom shower--jobs that I can do well, and help the household run smoother.
> 
> Anyway, your blindness will obviously be a part of such a book, but all relationships have their ups and downs, and I'm sure you can write a helpful book on ideas for dealing with them.
> 
> 
> Good luck,
> 
> Chris
> 
> 
> 
> 
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