[stylist] Back to Writing? Obituaries?

Tue Aug 25 15:46:23 UTC 2015

Jackie,

Thanks for sharing. I enjoy the humor, and you have really great details in
your obituary. I always like when you share.

Bridgit

-----Original Message-----
From: stylist [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Jackie
Williams via stylist
Sent: Monday, August 24, 2015 12:22 PM
To: 'Writers' Division Mailing List' <stylist at nfbnet.org>
Cc: Jackie Williams <jackieleepoet at cox.net>
Subject: [stylist] Back to Writing? Obituaries?

All of the last back and forths made me start to write obituaries. Though I
have four, I am just including a very short poem of my mother's, and another
short one of mine. 
I am also pasting a fictional obituary simply because one of the men in our
poetry group and I had an ongoing feud about who could write the most
ridiculous obituary.
No winner was ever declared.
So have some fun, or if you wish to continue the religious aspects, this is
a way you can do so and have it critiqued from the professionals we are, and
not for the content which we might not agree with. 

Solution
Just plant me under a tree
Environmentally.
You won't need a casket
a box or a basket
for biodegradable me.
              Donnafred

Obituary                           

When I am settled down up there
I'll have myself a holy tear,
or when I'm fired up down there,
I'll surely make the Devil care.

But if I'm not invited in
because of godly grace or sin,
I'll plant myself in earth with men,
and grow to bud and bloom again.
              Jacqueline Williams

Obituary                           Jacqueline Williams 
On Oct. 22, Pesky Home Pest Control and Conservation visited the Lee home in
response to a frantic call about the sight of several huge sewer size
cockroaches. The woman of the house lived alone, and was partially sighted
but could see big moving black blobs on the white tile in her bathroom. The
records showed that the entire house was sprayed. On the morning of Oct. 24,
in answer to a Medic-alert flash, the following scenario was surmised about
the death of said woman. While taking a shower, apparently Miss Lee tried to
bolt from the enclosed space and got tangled in the shower curtain. Her
weight apparently broke the curtain loose, and she fell within it on her
back in an oval shaped empty clothes basket near the shower. Her arms and
legs were sticking straight up from the dark curtain lining the basket, now
like a shell. In the shower, and again, next to the basket there were two
huge cockroaches on their backs with their legs sticking straight up. The
family does not know whether it was a broken neck, or from shock that caused
a heart attack, or whether Miss Lee had an allergic reaction to pest spray.
It has since been found that the City of Mesa sprayed the sewers in front of
the home area on Oct. 20, causing the cockroaches to make a run for any
exits, one being the shower of Miss Lee. The strangest aspect is that a
recording of a Mexican national dance, named "La Cucaracha" was still
spinning on a player next to the bath, with a cockroach costume laid out on
the bed. Her sons said it was a favorite dance that she loved to teach her
students when they needed shaking up a bit. Pesky Home Pest Control and
Conservation offered to provide food after the service, but the family
declined. There are no services scheduled as no one could be found to give a
eulogy. It is rumored that the contents of the house, containing many art
objects and paintings of insects, will be auctioned off. I, as a red-blooded
journalist, have chosen to print this with no byline in spite of a request
for privacy.

Jackie Lee

Time is the school in which we learn.
Time is the fire in which we burn.
Delmore Schwartz       

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