[stylist] New poem--Cane of Cchulhu

Wed Jul 22 14:20:42 UTC 2015

The words themselves resonate and have power. That I do not contest. In
fact, this is one of Shawn's best poems, in my opinion, grin. But in terms
of structure and format, for me, the change in line length was a bit
disconcerting, jarring. But I will also say that if I could read this poem
with just the naked eye, I may feel differently. It may be hearing it as
opposed to reading it in print or Braille makes a difference. As an editor,
reading material can also make a difference because you tend to read
everything analytically first, recognizing the  potential and creativity but
also noting the mechanical side of the writing at the same time. And I feel
it's an interesting creative choice with the line length. But over-all, I
really like the poem. Very strong metaphor that is consistent throughout.

Bridgit

-----Original Message-----
From: stylist [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of EvaMarie
Sanchez via stylist
Sent: Tuesday, July 21, 2015 10:33 PM
To: Writers' Division Mailing List
Cc: EvaMarie Sanchez
Subject: Re: [stylist] New poem--Cane of Cchulhu

Okay so that is it. The line length did not bother me, because there seemed
to be an increase of energy going on.  It built from the meek little lines
to the all powerful long lines. And then it stopped.
That is where I felt lost, but is that not how our lives seem to be? We
start as meek little babes and grow, hopefully, into powerful adults. And
then suddenly we die.
Yeah, the more I think about it, the more I like it.
Eve

 President, National Federation of the Blind Northern Arizona President,
National Federation of the Blind Writers' Division Committee Chair, Arizona
Association of Guide Dog Users Affiliate Member, National Federation of the
Blind Legislative Committee Affiliate Member, National Federation of the
Blind Membership Committee Member, Slate & Style Editing Team

"You do not need to have vision to see the stars."

On Tue, Jul 21, 2015 at 6:53 PM, Barbara HAMMEL via stylist <
stylist at nfbnet.org> wrote:

> That bothered me, too. They were short lines and then for no rhyme or 
> reason they grew twice as long. It made me stop and have to gather 
> myself back into the poem when I noticed it.
> Barbara
>
> Sent from my iPhone
>
> > On Jul 21, 2015, at 14:36, Bridgit Kuenning-Pollpeter via stylist <
> stylist at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> >
> > Shawn,
> >
> > Interesting poem. I like the metaphor you have going. Curious, what 
> > type
> of
> > poem is this? The line length changes towards end, wondering about
> format.
> >
> > Bridgit
> >
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: stylist [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of 
> > Jacobson, Shawn D via stylist
> > Sent: Tuesday, July 21, 2015 1:52 PM
> > To: Writer's Division Mailing List (stylist at nfbnet.org)
> > Cc: Jacobson, Shawn D
> > Subject: [stylist] New poem--Cane of Cchulhu
> >
> > OK
> >
> > I got tired of being blocked, so decided to scribble down a poem for 
> > what it's worth.
> >
> > And here it is.
> >
> > Shawn
> >
> > Cane of Cchulhu
> >
> > Surely elder gods
> > who dwell in deepest darkness
> > do not walk by sight
> >
> > Cchulhu it is said
> > lives in utter darkness
> > in stygian caves or lightless voids
> > in realms beyond the ken of man.
> >
> > And so what would this creature know of light to it as alien as is
> blindness
> > to those who see and trust in sight alone happy in their normal 
> > suppositions.
> >
> > So should Cchulhu walk our mundane ground what then could help to
> navigate
> > our ways a cane perhaps to help him on his way through the 
> > intricacies of the lands we take for granted.
> >
> > And what then of this soul,
> > nether living in sight or blindness
> > surrounded by a mighty unseen host
> > by Gods and monsters alien to my nature.
> >
> > Then should I seek Cchulhu's cane.
> > So as to walk with barrowed confidence, the ways of light and 
> > darkness all of the worlds in which I dwell.
> >
> > I do not walk by sight
> > for I to live in darkness
> > in need of guidance.
> >
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