[Stylist] Question about a Book That's Been Mentioned Here

bkpollpeter at gmail.com bkpollpeter at gmail.com
Tue Oct 23 17:20:00 UTC 2018 

Usually, you communicate/argue the way you were taught/exposed to. My family is known for sweeping everything under the rug until it builds up and you just burst. We have terrible arguments where we say really nasty things and go for the jugular. I hated this when I lived with my parents, and when I got married, my husband and I sat down and had a conversation about how we were going to communicate with each other. We have definitely had our issues and their arguments, but, I am happy to say that in 13 years, we have not called names and been nasty with each other even when upset. I wanted to leave that part of my life behind, and I didn’t want my kids to be around this kind of behavior. So, while we often will engage in the behavior we are exposed to, we also can learn and make choices to be better about it as well. It’s not easy, I’m certainly not saying that :-) but, for me, especially having two little boys, I want a better future for them. I want them to understand they can express emotion and it in no way is a comment on their masculinity. And I want them to understand how to communicate openly and honestly, not storming out of the room or just saying nasty things to release frustration.

Sent from my iPhone

> On Oct 23, 2018, at 10:55 AM, Vejas Vasiliauskas via Stylist <stylist at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> 
> That makes total sense. Some of the male friends I mentioned are first-generation Americans. Much of their cultural expectations are put upon them by their families.
> Vejas
> 
> Sent from my iPhone
> 
>> On 23 Oct 2018, at 06:18, Bridgit Kuenning-Pollpeter via Stylist <stylist at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>> 
>> Most the time, it's not that males don't have as many emotions, actually, quite the opposite, but, that we insist males must not be emotional. We force societal ideals that males must be strong, lack emotions and certainly not express them. So, a lot of boys grow up with this idea that they are not manly if they express themselves, creating a generation of emotionally stunted people. Kudos, Vejas, for not being afraid to communicate and express yourself. It's a matter of nurture vs. nature and not a DNA thing 😊
>> 
>> Bridgit
>> 
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: Stylist <stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Vejas Vasiliauskas via Stylist
>> Sent: Tuesday, October 23, 2018 12:56 AM
>> To: Writers' Division Mailing List <stylist at nfbnet.org>
>> Cc: Vejas Vasiliauskas <alpineimagination at gmail.com>
>> Subject: Re: [Stylist] Question about a Book That's Been Mentioned Here
>> 
>> Hi Janet,
>> That makes total sense. i've never been married before (I'm only 21 and just started my third year of college). 
>> See, that's the really interesting thing. I'm a male, but I'm very emotional, which is not a typical trait for males. Most of my friends (not all) are girls, because I feel I can relate to them better and have deep discussions. I find it so interesting how some of my male friends would behave incertain situations. Sometimes I know that they're hurting or struggling, but they don't want to talk about it, they just keep telling me everything is "great." Yeah, right, not always.
>> Thanks so much. I'm finding this really interesting.
>> Vejas
>> 
>> Sent from my iPhone
>> 
>>> On 22 Oct 2018, at 21:38, Janet Dinola Parmerter via Stylist <stylist at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>>> 
>>> Hi Again,
>>> 
>>> That is the beauty of differences. If you have never been married, you may not understand the man cave deal or how men want to solve an issue, when a woman may just want to discuss the situation with someone.
>>> 
>>> However, having been married for 42 years, I can honestly say that book hits the nail on the head of many aspects of marriage.
>>> 
>>> 
>>> 
>>> Finding the person who you can be happy with for years, may be a difficult thing, but it is definitely not impossible.
>>> 
>>> Have fun looking.
>>> 
>>> Ciao,
>>> 
>>> 
>>> Janet Parmerter Di Nola
>>> Office (678) 407-9787
>>> ParmerTours LLC www.ParmerTours.com<http://www.ParmerTours.com>  / 
>>> Illinois Travel [cid:image002.jpg at 01D46A68.AC2C3B70] Travel Image Logo; With a plane and ship in the background, a man and woman run into the wind with a suitcase. While holding his hat on his head, his tie and the woman’s dark hair blow back over their shoulders, and her long legs stretch forward as she races to catch up with him.
>>> 
>>> 
>>> 
>>> 
>>> 
>>> 
>>> 
>>> 
>>> 's
>>> 
>>> 
>>> 
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: Stylist <stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Vejas 
>>> Vasiliauskas via Stylist
>>> Sent: Monday, October 22, 2018 10:51 PM
>>> To: Writers' Division Mailing List <stylist at nfbnet.org>
>>> Cc: Vejas Vasiliauskas <alpineimagination at gmail.com>
>>> Subject: Re: [Stylist] Question about a Book That's Been Mentioned 
>>> Here
>>> 
>>> 
>>> 
>>> Hi Bridgit and Janet,
>>> 
>>> Thank you for both your differing opinions on this.
>>> 
>>> I checked it out on Bookshare and pretty much immediately lost interest.
>>> 
>>> Vejas
>>> 
>>> 
>>> 
>>> Sent from my iPhone
>>> 
>>> 
>>> 
>>>>> On 22 Oct 2018, at 09:03, Bridgit Kuenning-Pollpeter via Stylist <stylist at nfbnet.org<mailto:stylist at nfbnet.org>> wrote:
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>> 
>>>> I will just say, I don't think this book is all that great, and 
>>>> frankly, it's based on antiquated notions. Lots of research has been 
>>>> done to disprove the theory this book is based around. Men and women 
>>>> are not as different as this book presents. I wouldn't really turn to 
>>>> books, especially one like this, for dating advice. Rather, just get 
>>>> out there, be yourself and have fun. Don't always think in terms of 
>>>> relationships but just have fun making friends. And if things turn 
>>>> more romantic, great, but, don't make it a huge focus. College should 
>>>> be a great time where you just have fun and learn who you are. If you 
>>>> meet someone, great, but, don't stress too much about it 😊
>>> 
>>>> 
>>> 
>>>> Bridgit
>>> 
>>>> 
>>> 
>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> 
>>>> From: Stylist 
>>>> <stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org<mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org>> On 
>>>> Behalf Of Vejas Vasiliauskas via Stylist
>>> 
>>>> Sent: Monday, October 22, 2018 10:32 AM
>>> 
>>>> To: stylist at nfbnet.org<mailto:stylist at nfbnet.org>
>>> 
>>>> Cc: Vejas Vasiliauskas 
>>>> <alpineimagination at gmail.com<mailto:alpineimagination at gmail.com>>
>>> 
>>>> Subject: [Stylist] Question about a Book That's Been Mentioned Here
>>> 
>>>> 
>>> 
>>>> 
>>> 
>>>> Hi All,
>>> 
>>>> I know that awhile back (maybe a year or so ago), someone mentioned reading "Men Are from Mars, Women are from Venus." I think that as a college student, who may enter a relationship in the next couple of years, this book would be interesting. Did you like it and was it worth the read?
>>> 
>>>> Thanks,
>>> 
>>>> Vejas
>>> 
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