[blindkid] Coping with grief of having blind child fable

[Kim Cunningham]

I also received this story when my daughter was delivered prematurely. It was a bit different (I believe it was a trip to Holland). The story tries to deliver the message that even though something happens differently than what you planned, there are still many reasons to be happy. I was very comforted by the story. I was so in love with my new baby and so happy to touch her.  I couldn't detract myself from how close she was to dying - daily, but our trip to Holland was not saddened. Everyone else saw a sick baby with a lot of tubes and wires, but I saw my daughter. And yes, it has been a bumpy trip to Holland, I should have upgraded my seat! At the end of the day, I wouldn't change a thing.  
Kim Cunningham 

--- On Wed, 11/3/10, Bo Page <bo.page at sbcglobal.net> wrote:


From: Bo Page <bo.page at sbcglobal.net>
Subject: Re: [blindkid] Coping with grief of having blind child fable
To: "NFBnet Blind Kid Mailing List, (for parents of blind children)" <blindkid at nfbnet.org>
Date: Wednesday, November 3, 2010, 12:47 PM


Garardo,
Although someone had good intentions when they wrote that, I had a bad reaction 
to it when I received it in a card from a co-worker after returning to work 
after a 6-week maternity leave. It angered me because the person who gave it to 
me had no idea how bad it felt to be in my position.  It's been 18 years for me 
and maybe I can use that analogy now, back then it made me angry that someone 
could use such a loose analogy on a subject matter that when you receive the 
diagnosis it crushes your spirit like nothing else out there.  If loosing a 
child is the worst thing that can happen to a person, learning a child is sick, 
injured or impaired is the second worse thing.  But that's just my opinion.  If 
one doesn't know what to say to a grieving parent, I think it's best to say as 
little as possible and just be kind to that person.  When I find myself in the 
position I say my truth, "It will probably hurt a lot worse before it gets 
better, but it will get better, and you will find strength along the way."

Hope this helps,

Bo
CT



________________________________
From: Gerardo Corripio <gera1027 at gmail.com>
To: BlindKids <blindkid at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Wed, November 3, 2010 1:34:32 PM
Subject: [blindkid] Coping with grief of having blind child fable

Hi guys: the other day listening to a Spanish podcast regarding the process 
parents have to cope through in dealing with the diagnosis of blindness in 
children a fable came up, thus I'd like to share; probably more then one of 
you guys will identify yourself with it; I'll adapt to a US version of it.
Suppose you book yourself a trip to let's say Cancun, Mexico. Excited you 
begin packing your things, when the day arrives going to the airport, 
getting on the plane all excited and can't wait until you get to your 
destination! You're about to land when the lady in the cabin says we've 
arrived in Alaska. You say no I wasn't going to Alaska I was going to 
Cancun! The lady says well you can't stay onboard, thus you have to get off 
when we land. You begin to disembark; you get to cold weather when you 
didn't come prepared for this change since you have only clothes for summer. 
You feel disappointed, angry and all sorts of negative feelings come 
through. Though you at first don't enjoy the trip, you begin to discover all 
the joys Alaska has to offer and begin to like the trip. Some parts of you 
want to get on another plane and get back to your starting point, but you've 
already booked the trip, thus can't cancel or go back!
Sound familiar? How can you guys apply this fable to blindness and diagnosis 
of a blind child or relative?
Gerardo 


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