[blindkid] Dealing with selfish behavior

Mon Jun 2 03:01:00 UTC 2014

Maybe its the age, but her and I have had a battle for control since she
was born!  ha!

Traci

On Sun, Jun 1, 2014 at 10:23 PM, Pui via blindkid <blindkid at nfbnet.org>
wrote:

> I have a sighted 9 year old and I could throttle him sometimes! Traci,
> hang on in there!
>
> Sent from my iPad
>
> > On Jun 1, 2014, at 7:09 PM, Arielle Silverman via blindkid <
> blindkid at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> >
> > Hi Traci and all,
> >
> > While I think that getting blind kids involved in volunteerism is
> > great for many reasons, I'm not sure it really addresses her issues
> > with behaving selfishly. I suspect that she is acting this way at
> > least in part because it is hard for her to take another's
> > perspective, as it is for many kids including myself when I was her
> > age. I wonder if requiring her to go along on your or her brother's
> > errands, for example, might teach her how obnoxious it is when someone
> > else is calling all the shots or making her do things she doesn't
> > enjoy doing. It could also be a good way to teach compromise, if she
> > has to go along on an outing or activity someone else enjoys and she
> > doesn't, but then in return if she is cooperative she can choose the
> > next outing or activity for the family.
> > I also think that sometimes blind kids can put on a bossy front to
> > regain control in environments where much of the action is
> > inaccessible to them. If all the kids on the playground are playing
> > sports that aren't adapted or are excluding a blind child from their
> > games, the blind child's best defense may be to come up with
> > activities she can do and then demand the other kids join her in those
> > activities. It's worth making sure that the popular social activities,
> > sports, etc. her peers are participating in are fully accessible so
> > she is not limited to just one or two options.
> >
> > Best,
> > Arielle
> >
> >> On 6/1/14, oandemom . via blindkid <blindkid at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> >> Oooh, I know just the church thrift store where she can do that!  :)
> >>
> >> Thanks for the tip!
> >>
> >> Traci
> >>
> >>
> >> On Sun, Jun 1, 2014 at 5:46 PM, Marianne Denning <
> marianne at denningweb.com>
> >> wrote:
> >>
> >>> I had a blind student and her Mom took her to fold and hang clothes at
> >>> a church where people can go to get clothing when they need this help.
> >>> It accomplished two things.  The student learned to fold and hang
> >>> clothes very well and she learned to give back.  I tell all of my
> >>> students that we need to move beyond independence to interdependence.
> >>> It is important that blind people give back as well as receive.
> >>>
> >>>> On 6/1/14, oandemom . via blindkid <blindkid at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> >>>> Hello!  I have a daughter, 9 and VI, who tends to be bossy and
> selfish.
> >>> I
> >>>> feel I have to watch her interact with other children b/c she has a
> >>> strong
> >>>> personality and she wants to control what is being played.  I do my
> best
> >>> on
> >>>> this front.   Lately she has been very selfish, unless it is something
> >>> that
> >>>> benefits her, she isn't interested (you would think she is a
> teenager!)
> >>>> -
> >>>> its very frustrating.  We talk about how she isn't allowed to disrupt
> >>>> our
> >>>> family with her behavior (I do have some guidance from a special
> >>>> behavior
> >>>> preschool that she attended but I'm going off what I remember back
> then,
> >>>> but she attended mostly due to her social skills) - that she has to
> be a
> >>>> helpful part of this family and do as she is told, etc.  Today, I have
> >>> been
> >>>> reduced to making her write something 100 times because I just don't
> >>>> know
> >>>> what to do with her anymore.
> >>>>
> >>>> I am trying to find some volunteer opportunities to have her give of
> her
> >>>> time to help others and to think of others, but I know she will think
> it
> >>> is
> >>>> fun, b/c she is "working"  - she loves to work.  She may like it for 5
> >>> min
> >>>> and then be done, so it may actually work out okay, but I need to try
> >>>> it.
> >>>> I thought of soup kitchens, but she won't get that visual effect that
> is
> >>>> what I'm really looking for to make her have an appreciation of what
> she
> >>>> does have.
> >>>>
> >>>> I don't really think taking things away from her will work, b/c she
> >>> doesn't
> >>>> even know half the stuff in her room, she is so out of sight, out of
> >>> mind.
> >>>>
> >>>> Does anyone know of any volunteer activities that they have done or
> seen
> >>>> that a 9 year could be included in and really get something out of it.
> >>> We
> >>>> talk all the time about how there are many kids who don't have what
> she
> >>>> has, etc etc, but it just doesn't click with her, as I'm sure it
> doesn't
> >>>> for many kids her age.
> >>>>
> >>>> I would appreciate ANY suggestions!!!
> >>>>
> >>>> Thanks,
> >>>> Traci
> >>>> _______________________________________________
> >>>> blindkid mailing list
> >>>> blindkid at nfbnet.org
> >>>> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blindkid_nfbnet.org
> >>>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> >>>> blindkid:
> >>>
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> >>>
> >>>
> >>> --
> >>> Marianne Denning, TVI, MA
> >>> Teacher of students who are blind or visually impaired
> >>> (513) 607-6053
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> --
> >> Traci Wilkerson
> >> Cell – 919-971-6526
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> >>
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> >
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-- 
Traci Wilkerson
Cell – 919-971-6526