[blindlaw] some questions
Hyde, David W. (ESC)
david.hyde at wcbvi.k12.wi.us
Mon Aug 8 13:05:26 UTC 2011
I apologize for the offence, and my misperception. I should know better than to trust my memory of the Holy Koran, rather than doing research first. No offence was intended, I assure you. For those of us who are not learned in the faith of Islam, I am grateful for your correction.
Since you are learned in the faith, could you help this lady in her need to convince her prospective in-laws about the ability of blind people? Perhaps what I thought would be an impediment could be a help.
-----Original Message-----
From: blindlaw-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blindlaw-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of AZNOR99 at aol.com
Sent: Saturday, August 06, 2011 7:14 AM
To: blindlaw at nfbnet.org
Subject: Re: [blindlaw] some questions
David, with all due respect, you're wrong about how Islam perceives the blind and blindness. It isn't the religion or its values that pity the blind, and rather various cultural and political beliefs that perpetuate that stereotype. You said "if his family comes from an Islamic background, and still holds to some of the tenants of the Koran and the Sharia, blindness is a condition to be pitied, and blind people are those who are specifically identified as recipients of charity." As a learned Muslim, I'd like to see direct citations in the Qur'an or Hadeeth that support this position. In
fact, Hadeeth point to the blind as often the most learned and wise. Anyone
who is economically disadvantaged, orphans, and widows are the categories expressly listed to be considered as charity recipients, when they need it.
The notion that the Islamic religion expressly believes what you attribute to it is akin to the notion that any blind American walking down the street should be given a dollar because blind should be pitied and taken care of. Most of us on this list would believe that statement is proposterous, and the same is true anywhere else in the world. Please, check your facts before making such statements. Incidentally, I am personally offended by this depiction.
Beth, this is a challenging problem. If you and your partner wish to marry, there is no legal reason that I'm aware of that would prevent you from doing so simply because you are blind - this is the case both hear and in somalia. If he is Muslim and you wish to obtain an Islamic marriage, you'll simply both need to be adults, have the requisite number of witnesses, and have completed any type of pre-marrital counseling and marriage contract negotiations the sheikh and specific mosque require. The fact that you are not Somali is not a factor that can prevent the legal marriage contract from being executed or enforced.
However, the reception you get from the community is quite a different thing. Statistically, there are many more Somali women in the world and in the U.S. than Somali men (largely due to the consequences of a civil war and current refugee migration systems that give priority to women and children). It may be that these folks who disapprove of your marriage are simply trying to "look out for their own," if you will, because if your fiance marries you, he won't marry a Somali woman.
I'm a bit of a subject matter expert on the Somali diaspora, so feel free to email me off-list if you want to discuss this further.
Good luck, and congratulations!
Regards,
Ronza
In a message dated 8/5/2011 12:14:41 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, david.hyde at wcbvi.k12.wi.us writes:
I agree with the others who have responded. On a purely cultural level, blindness is viewed differently in his culture than it is in ours. Further, if his family comes from an Islamic background, and still holds to some of the tenants of the Koran and the Sharia, blindness is a condition to be pitied, and blind people are those who are specifically identified as recipients of charity. If these beliefs are deeply ingrained, there may be no hope of changing them. You might try, if this be the case, talking some someone at a local mosque. If they have a person whose opinion they value, and that person agrees with you, get him, or her, to intercede.
Blindness in their country is almost always, an unmitigated tragedy. There are very few opportunities. Attitudes change very slowly. You may, ultimately, have to wed without their buy in. But try everything else first. If you don't, you will wish you had. If you do everything you can, then you can believe that you did your best. The parents may, eventually come around.
-----Original Message-----
From: blindlaw-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blindlaw-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Beth
Sent: Friday, August 05, 2011 8:36 AM
To: blindlaw at nfbnet.org
Subject: [blindlaw] some questions
Hi, guys.
I have some questions about a cultural conflict going on with some people who are trying to prevent me and my current boyfriend from marrying. They state that because we are both totally blind, we would 1. Not make good parents or are not fit to be parents.
2. Would be unable to perform everyday tasks when indeed we've both graduated from the Colorado Center for the Blind x number of months ago.
3. That my boyfriend would be bored and lonely. These men are Somali, so they state he should also marry his own kind, surely a sign of
discrimination. They are not willing to change. How should we deal with them?
Thanks.
Beth
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