[nabs-l] highschool question

Sat Aug 30 02:06:32 UTC 2014

I Agree with Lily.  Joining activities both in high school, and in
middle school, did help me to make friends, and have some fun as well.
During Middle School, I was involved, in Wrestling, academic Bowl, and
in a service club called Beta Club.  It was nice to contribute to a
team and to enjoy talking to others who were interested in things that
I was.  The nice thing about joining extra after school activities, is
that you get out in your community, and just don't sit at home doing
nothing.  I am so glad to be a part of this list, and to hear from
younger blind people who want to pursue an education and better
themselves.  This is something I feel very strongly about.  It isn't
easy going to high school, or college, because we as blind
individuals, often have to fight for the things we feel we need, but I
believe, in the end, this makes us better people because, we have
goals for our lives, and we do all in our power to achieve them.

On 8/29/14, Lillie Pennington via nabs-l <nabs-l at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> I have to agree with Kurts ideology here.
> My high school has a general reputation, which I have found to be pretty
> true in my experience, to be extremely clicky. These clicks don't seem to
> have room for me besides being a cherody case.
> Sure, their nice enough to me, but at the end of the day they really don't
> see the true values of being my friend.
> There are several pretty cool people that I'm pretty good acquaintances
> with
> at my school; however, they have other friends, so as I said its an
> acquaintance. I'm trying to not push back too hard because then again, I
> run
> the risk of being a cherity case; and that is a risk I am not willing to
> take.
> I would rather know that I am not wanted/do not fit in vs being  someone to
> be pitied.
>
> Part of this dates back to elementary school; quite honestly, I was a weird
> child that not a lot of people, blind or sited wanted to be friends with
> me.
> There were adults seemingly hovering all over the place, and what
> elementary
> school child would want to deal with that? That said, I did know a few
> pretty cool people. I was also the target once of an extended period of
> pretty not-so-good teacher behavior, shall we say. I was the kid that was
> quite sad and really did not feel that I could relate to other people my
> age.
>
> Relating is something I still kind of have problems with today. I don't
> really feel that I care that much about today's generation trends such as
> posting enormous amounts of pictures and other weird stuff on social media,
> and obsessing over fashion, for example. I also do not really feel that
> they
> could relate to day-to-day things with blindness, such as even the small
> things like being annoyed that I had to do one of my TVI's weird
> assignments
> in study hall verses being able to do my homework. I sometimes have trouble
> coming up with conversation topics with my peers aside from a superficial
> level. I also feel that I am a little more mature (I'm not sure if that's
> the right word) and that I had to grow up a lot more quickly than my sited
> peers.
>
> Anyway, onto the original topic.
> I'd definitely recommend joining some extracurriculars that you like, or
> have an interest in. I'd also try to make sure that you have the
> independence skills to be able to be a valuable contributor to the club and
> not just sit around. You have to be able to prove right from the start that
> you have something to contribute. I've met some of my afquaintances this
> way.
>
> One last thing to be aware of: If this is an issue, I'd make sure that your
> school staff know that absolutely under no circumstances are they to set
> you
> up with friends, in the sense to ask someone to be your friend. I had a
> group of friends (who I thought were my friends, anyway) in middle school
> who I have very strong reason to suspect, although I could never prove it,
> that my aid at the time or someone else asked them to feel sorry for me and
> to be my friends. Anyway, once I pretty much figured it out, It served as a
> very strong source of humiliation for me and I hope nobody else has hod to
> go through that.
>
> I am sorry for the overall tone of this email being negative. I am sure
> most
> of you have had good experiences, and I am not trying to discount them or
> create a sob story. I am just trying to paint a full  picture here.
>
>
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: nabs-l [mailto:nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Kirt via
> nabs-l
> Sent: Friday, August 29, 2014 8:59 PM
> To: louvins at gmail.com; National Association of Blind Students mailing list
> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] highschool question
>
> This is fascinating. High school was when I first started to realize, if
> only subconsciously, that most people don't treat me like a normal person
> and blindness is pretty much the main reason. It's gotten better since, as
> I've learned to balance quality humor with genuine competence, but it's not
> an easy thing.
>
> Sent from my iPhone
>
>> On Aug 29, 2014, at 6:27 PM, Joshua Hendrickson via nabs-l
> <nabs-l at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>>
>> Hello to Anna and all.  I agree with what has already been said.
>> Don't be afraid to joke around about your blindness if you are
>> comfortable doing that.  I always used to joke around in college
>> classes when I felt the time was right.  I got a lot of pretty good
>> laughs from students from time to time.  I've also had a class of
>> students become silent after I've made a joke and the teacher being
>> afraid of offending me which I thought was pretty funny, since I'd
>> been the one who made the joke in the first place.  Don't be afraid to
>> talk to people around you.  If someone asks you a question about
>> blindness answer the question if you can.  One time, I had a girl
>> after one of my college math classes aproach me, and ask me some
>> questions about what it was like being blind.  She wasn't even in my
>> usual math class.  I answered her questions, then she came up to me in
>> the studen center a few days later, and asked me a question, that I
>> had never thought about.  She asked me how do you talk to a blind
>> person?  I didn't laugh, although, I thought this was a different
>> question.  I told her, you talk to a blind person the same way you
>> talk to a sighted person.  Making friends can be very nice.  Good
>> luck.
>>
>>> On 8/29/14, Sofia Gallo via nabs-l <nabs-l at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>>> Totally agree with Marissa, I've had a similar experience and I joke
>>> about stuff all the time (smile)
>>>
>>>> On 8/29/14, Marissa Tejeda via nabs-l <nabs-l at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>>>> I know this may sound...  (lack for a word right now).
>>>> I have made friends very easily all my life.  High school may seem
>>>> hard, but it really isn't.  (smiles) I'm in the tenth grade, and
>>>> have bunches of friends.  I am in band, but when I play with the
>>>> others, no one notices I'm blind.
>>>> It would help if I had some music, but that's a different story.
>>>> I did perform in a pep rally last year.  I got two standing
>>>> ovations, (there were two rallies so everyone in the school could
>>>> go).
>>>> I sat at a table by myself, one day.  (This was just this week.) Two
>>>> girls sat across from me.  I didn't talk, so they didn't talk to me,
>>>> (same would have happened, had I been able to see).  Then, my
>>>> friends, Michelle and Jessica, came and sat by me.  I started
>>>> talking with them; the two girls that sat across from me were
>>>> friends of there's.  we ended up having a great time and now, I can
>>>> ALMOST tell them by voice.  I still get confused between Michelle
>>>> and Jessica, but I'm getting better.
>>>>
>>>> Just be open about it.  This may sound cruel to some, but I'm so
>>>> open about my blindness, I'll joke about it in class.  "I can't see
>>>> the board, can I move?" or someone says, "I'll see you tomorrow,
>>>> Marissa." I'll turn, look at them, and say, "I won't."
>>>> It gets people laughing.  I answer questions about being blind,
>>>> whenever I'm asked.  Some people are shy; just say, "It's ok, you
>>>> can ask."
>>>> They think they will offend you.  Just let them know that they
>>>> won't.
>>>>
>>>> If you need any help, feel free to email me off-list.
>>>>
>>>>
>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>> From: Ana Martinez via nabs-l <nabs-l at nfbnet.org
>>>> To: nabs-l at nfbnet.org
>>>> Date sent: Fri, 29 Aug 2014 09:08:49 -0600
>>>> Subject: [nabs-l] highschool question
>>>>
>>>> hi all I have a question, how do you make friends in highschool, for
>>>> me it has been difficult because there a lot of students and in all
>>>> of my classes there are different kids ,
>>>>
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