[nagdu] Later Oct. update, Ed died
Linda Gwizdak
linda.gwizdak at cox.net
Tue Oct 27 23:46:39 UTC 2009
Toni,
Sorry to hear about Ed. My prayers are with you. He is in the loving arms
of the Lord and, I think, he will be with us always as we continue the fight
for our rights as disabled people and as assistance dog users. Ed will be
missed by us all.
Although I saw both of you at numerous conventions, I enjoyed seeing both of
you and I appreciate all the work you do.
Yours,
Linda and Landon
----- Original Message -----
From: "Ed and Toni Eames" <eeames at csufresno.edu>
To: <Recipient list suppressed:>
Sent: Sunday, October 25, 2009 9:05 PM
Subject: Re: [nagdu] Later Oct. update, Ed died
>
>>Oct. 25 2009 update
>>
>>Hi all,
>>
>>Ed did not go to rehab as planned on Oct. 16. The doctors could not
>>control his fluctuating high white count, so he stayed at St. Agnes until
>>he could build strength and endurance. The first stroke hit on Oct. 9,
>>and Ed made slow progress during the next few days. On Tuesday, the 13,
>>he had a sleepy day, and I was scared. But on Wednesday, he rallied and
>>grew stronger and stronger.
>>
>>The first step in physical therapy was getting Ed to sit up in a stretcher
>>chair. This is a great device where the patient is rolled from bed onto
>>a stretcher, strapped in for safety, then gradually raised into a sitting
>>position. The lift Ambulation Team is made up of very muscular men to
>>help with transfers from bed to chair, and they were extremely nurturent
>>guys. Once in the stretcher chair, Ed could be fed his thickened diet.
>>He never complained about the food and continually practiced the
>>swallowing techniques recommended by the speech therapist. Actually, this
>>swallowing technique is good for those of us who eat too fast. Each time
>>you swallow a bite of food, take time to do another swallow with an empty
>>mouth. Here's another exercise: hold the tip of your tongue between your
>>teeth, keep your chin down and swallow. If you tackle that, put your
>>tongue further out between your teeth and swallow. These exercises were
>>to enable Ed to eat regular food. As a food lover, Ed obsessed about
>>making progress until he could eat a hamburger and drink water and a beer!
>>
>>When Ed was diagnosed with diabetes several years ago, we had many battles
>>about his not walking around the house barefooted. When he received a
>>pair of fleece-lined slippers from Eve Hoopes for the holidays in 2006, he
>>diligently wore them. During his hospital stay, he obsessed about having
>>the slippers handy. In his mind, they signified walking again. When the
>>LAT guys helped him sit in the stretcher chair and later a regular chair,
>>he insisted on wearing his slippers rather than the hospital socks.
>>
>>Ed became a favorite among staff. He always treated them with courtesy,
>>letting them know how much he appreciated their assistance. As his speech
>>improved, he chatted with everyone who came into his room. He appreciated
>>the many visitors and I needed the distraction of phone calls and friends.
>>
>>On the 18th puppy raiser Mary Flynn took Keebler and Latrell to her home
>>for a run in her yard. Then Mary and her daughter Brenna took the Goldens
>>for a long walk. It was a wonderful break from the dogs being cooped up
>>in the hospital room. Earlier in the week, former puppy raisers Anita and
>>son Eric took the fur kids on a similar outing.
>>
>>In some ways, Ed was charmingly child-like during this first week. He
>>greeted everyone with joy, and practiced leg lifts as prescribed by the
>>physical therapist, arm stretches advised by the occupational therapist
>>and swallowing. His motivation to get well and come home was over the
>>chart. We both took joy and encouragement with every success, no matter
>>how small.
>>My friend Richard Stone suggested I write down my fears, and the list got
>>pretty long. Would Ed have significant disabilities requiring us to move
>>from our two storey town house? With a left side weakness, would he be
>>able to work Latrell, or would Latrell need to be trained on the right?
>>With my spinal stenosis, would I have the physical strength to assist Ed?
>>The list is a lot longer, but I didn't allow myself to prepare for the
>>worst!
>>
>>When I arrived with my two precious guides on Saturday, the 17th, Ed was
>>sitting in a regular chair chatting with the nurse' aid. After regaling
>>his morning visitors, he got tired and was put back in bed. He hadn't
>>eaten much of his lunch and had already been given an insulin shot. His
>>sleep was restless and it turned out he had a hypoglycemic episode. After
>>being given sugar by the nurse, he came out of his fog with a almost manic
>>demeanor. Dr. Heller, the hospitalist, told Ed rehab was scheduled for
>>Monday. Ed was ecstatic and chatted nonstop to the doctor, praising St.
>>Agnes' open acceptance of our guide dogs, puppy raisers and therapy dogs.
>>He captured the doctor's interest with reminiscences of hospital access
>>denials satisfactorily solved through the intervention of IAADP. Ed's
>>speech was clear and his cognition perfect. He was so wound up, he didn't
>>leave room for anyone else to speak. When friend and reader Stephanie
>>Stanley tried to read e-mails to Ed, he kept interrupting with stories and
>>comments. When I left him, I finally let myself get truly hopeful that
>>things would work out!
>>
>>Sunday morning, the phone rang and I thought it was Ed calling with the
>>assistance of the nurse' aid. He had done that for the past few days.
>>Having left on such a high, I was not prepared for the news Ed was now in
>>a coma. The staff found him in this condition when they were scheduled to
>>turn him. My life, my hopes, my dreams and my partnership were destroyed
>>in a flash.
>>
>>Extensive tests, CT scans and EEGs showed significant swelling of the
>>brain and a second, more extensive stroke was suspected. When I was told,
>>Ed would be nonfunctioning if he came out of the coma, I made the awful
>>decision to discontinue all treatments. If he survived, he would have no
>>recognition his left side existed, making walking impossible. He would
>>have no speech and be fed through a feeding tube. He would live the rest
>>of his life in a nursing home. Ed and I had health directives, and this
>>was not a life Ed would have wanted.
>>
>>For four days, phenomenal friends kept vigil with me hoping circumstances
>>would change. I always thought comas were quiet, but Ed thrashed and
>>moaned and the hours I spent with him were torture. I talked to him,
>>touched him and cried with each nonresponsive moment. Latrell put paws on
>>the bed, frantically licked Ed's hand and wagged his Golden joy in seeing
>>his partner again. No miracles happened and Ed was transported by
>>ambulance to the Nancy Hinds Hospice home on Thursday, the 22nd.
>>
>>Ed was so respected and like by the St. Agnes staff that many nurses and
>>aids cried with me when they realized his goal of rehab and home were not
>>to be. He was always so engaging and gave thanks for each bath, feeding,
>>transfer, antibiotic infusion, taking of vital signs, cleaning him up, and
>>whatever other intervention was needed. One aid said she looked forward
>>to coming to work knowing her day would be filled with assisting Ed and
>>being welcomed by his big smile.
>>It was torture bringing home the suitcase I packed in readiness for
>>transfer to the rehab center. Bringing those slippers home knowing Ed
>>would never wear them again was the hardest thing. How do I reconstruct
>>my life without Ed? How do I become half of a team?
>>
>>At first I thought about bringing Ed home with home-based hospice care,
>>but since he would not know he was home and managing a crew of strangers
>>in my house with the dogs and cats, seemed illogical. The Nancy Hinds
>>Home takes six patients at a time in a home-like residence. Registered
>>nurses are working around the clock and pain management is overseen by
>>doctors.
>>
>>When Linda Haymond drove me to the home, I noted there were no sidewalks,
>>and commented Ed would not be happy, if only he knew. The installation of
>>sidewalks in new developments and throughout Fresno was a big advocacy
>>goal for Ed He is being given large doses of morphine and adavan to quiet
>>his bodily agitation. The home is pet friendly, so Latrell and Keebler
>>are most welcome. I was invited to let the dogs romp in the huge fenced
>>yard. Little angelic-looking Keebler took advantage of the opportunity to
>>dive into a small fountain and spread mud all over her coat! A good
>>toweling off made her presentable for lunch in an Indian restaurant.
>>
>>As a young anthropologist, Ed spent three years doing research in India,
>>fortunately long before I met him. He loves Indian food and has taught me
>>to love it, too. It was the beginning of many experiences and meals I
>>will no longer be sharing with him.
>>
>>Linda Haymond, Janet Moore, Beth Shea and Paul Kwiatkowski have held me
>>up throughout this ordeal with their almost every day visits and vigils.
>>Dozens of other friends and relatives have visited, phoned, sent cards and
>>e-mailed. Debbie Prieto has spent several nights with me and comes in the
>>morning after her walk to share breakfast with me. One positive of this
>>tragedy is that I have lost my appetite and have lost 10 pounds.
>>
>>Thankfully, the hospice has been able to calm Ed's agitation and it is
>>just a matter of waiting for his body to give up and end the journey. The
>>crazy thing is that his heart is strong, but his brain is gone! Some
>>people believe coma patients can hear, so we all talk to him and tell him
>>he can let go.
>>
>>My beloved husband and partner slipped into a quiet death on the morning
>>of Oct. 25. To continue his giving back to society, his body was donated
>>to Western University Medical School in Pomona, CA.
>>
>>I plan to keep Latrell. He is my connection to Ed. When Ed's dog Echo
>>retired, Eleanor Marugo made a lovely vest reading retired guide dog. We
>>took Echo to meetings and restaurants. When I travel again, my friend
>>Sheila Cary has offered to take Latrell and bring him to work, so he isn't
>>alone during the day. Keebler is very attached to Latrell and would be
>>very lonely without him. He is eight and too old to retrain with another
>>handler. I love this goofy canine and don't anticipate a problem keeping
>>him.
>>
>>I hope you will honor Ed's life and works by supporting the organizations
>>he most loved. Donations to IAADP can be made at www.iaadp.org or phoning
>>Newsreel for a credit card donation at 614-469-0700. Checks to these
>>organizations can also be sent to me at 3376 North Wishon, Fresno, CA
>>93704.
>>
>>A memorial service will be held in early December. I will feature the
>>many plaques honoring his achievements. I also want to assemble a book of
>>e-mail remembrances. Please write your special thoughts, fun stories and
>>comments about what Ed has personally meant to you and to the greater
>>community. Please put memories of Ed in the subject line and send it to
>>me at eeames at csufresno.edu.
>>
>>I cannot emphasize enough how important you all were in supporting me
>>through this tragedy. It kept me going and I'll need much more in the
>>months to come. Thanks for your love, your prayers and your many hours of
>>hand-holding and hugs in the hospital and hospice home.
>>
>>Toni and Furries
>>
>>
>
>
>
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