[nfbwatlk] drive in custodialism

Lauren Merryfield lauren at catlines.com
Sat Dec 13 05:53:21 UTC 2014


Hi,
I do not care for the attitude that we never need help either. I know that
we're "supposed to" be always in teaching mode, according to some
Federationists, but some of us are just living our lives and function in a
whole lot of different modes, teaching mode being only one of them. And some
of us have more difficulty multitasking multiple modes. 

I had the same problem in Omaha when, especially in the winters, I really
needed help with the ice and huge piles of snow, though my cane gave me good
info. The upshot of Omaha's sighted people fearing helping the blind brought
on a terrible experience for me. I was heading down to meet my bus to get to
work. It was snowy, icy and treacherous out and I lived on a hilly street.
The sidewalks were not scooped well at all so I walked at the edge of the
street. At one point, I lost my balance and landed in the middle of the
street. Cars drove around me. I was horrified! No one stopped to help
because the NFB in Omaha made sure people knew never to help us. It took me
a while to wait until there was a gap in traffic so I could roll over to the
curb and get up. My clothes were a mess so I walked back home to change. I
was so shaken up and so cold that it took me a while to take another bus and
arrive late to work, which they didn't like. This was a bad day that could
have been prevented if we hadn't been so hard-nosed from the NFB to the
agency for the blind. I know people saw me, but they refused to stop. The
whole thing didn't do anything to help my sense of self-esteem either.
Except that I was able to get myself up, back home and eventually to work by
myself.Whoopy! I vaguely remember functioning okay by myself but hearing the
cars driving around me as I lay there in the muck and freezing weather I
remember vividly.  I was fortunate not to have been hit or even killed due
to hard-nosed attitudes. I remember wondering how I was going to get to the
edge of the street or if I'd even make it. I was terrified! 
Thanks
Lauren, who reminds some that not all Federationists are alike. Some of us
do have a heart. 
Blessings to you in the name of Jesus Christ 
"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not into thine own
understanding.  In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy
paths." Proverbs #3#5-6
My book is now available in audiobook format:
www.TheresMoreThanOneWay.com
Visit my new website at 
www.mythirtyone.com/604934


-----Original Message-----
From: nfbwatlk [mailto:nfbwatlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Debby
Phillips via nfbwatlk
Sent: Friday, December 12, 2014 9:32 PM
To: Don Mitchell; NFB of Washington Talk Mailing List;
portillo.jim at gmail.com; k7uij at panix.com
Subject: Re: [nfbwatlk] drive in custodialism

Okay, I'm probably gonna piss some people off, but okay, what the 
heck.  You know, we are blind.  We don't always see what's ahead.  
It isn't that we need people's help to do things in our lives, 
but it sure isn't a bad thing if somebody offers to tell us 
what's ahead down the road.  You know, in Denver blind people 
have such a reputation for being rude that if a blind person did 
need help nobody would help them.  This is the one thing that 
used to piss me off when I was not in NFB.  It's that damned 
attitude of "I don't need anybody".  We all need each other and 
people just need to stop getting their knickers in a knot every 
time somebody offers a helpful piece of information.  This world 
is so frickin non-civil anyway.  Why do we have to add to it? 
Isn't it okay to just smile and say, Thanks, and go on your way? 
What does it hurt to treat people respectfully and not assume 
just because they offer some information that they think we can't 
do stuff without them.  I have been with my husband when he tried 
to tell a blind person, "Hey, there's something in front of you." 
He could tell that by the way they were using their cane or not 
paying attention to what their dog was trying to signal that they 
were going to bump in to it.  The person would get all snappy.  
And then bam! They'd bump into the very thing he was trying to 
tell them was there.  And then they'd be all mad because they 
bumped into it.  This is the one thing about NFB that I don't 
like, and I'll NEVER be this way.  I have given sighted people 
directions.  They don't seem to get all pissy because I do.  It's 
only blind folks that do do.  So kick me out if you want to, but 
this really frosts me.  We've lost the ability to be human with 
one another because we're all so damned scared that people are 
going to think us inferior, or dependent, or God only knows what.  
We need to get over ourselves.  Well, now that I've had my rant 
and will probably get a private reprimand, I think I'll go to 
bed.  Good night everybody.    Debby

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