[blindkid] Identify yourself please
Carol Castellano
blindchildren at verizon.net
Fri Nov 21 20:55:41 UTC 2008
"Oh, no guessing games, please. It's more helpful if you would just
tell her who you are."
Yes, I think it does come with the territory and it's an art form to
walk the line between being appropriately assertive and being
rude--both for parents and for blind individuals. So--be firm but
nice with others--and vent with us!
Carol
At 10:13 AM 11/21/2008, you wrote:
>I only have a few seconds to write, but wanted to add a question
>quick that ties into this one...
>
>SO many people that Lily (8 years old) has met before (some only
>once or twice) come up to her and say hi. If she doesn't know who
>it is, she very politely says "hi! What's your name?" Sometimes
>they tell her right away, but sometimes they do something that
>irritates me to no end and I don't know how to ask them in a polite
>way to stop or explain to them why I don't like it.
>
>People who don't know her very well think she is amazing and they
>love that she can remember voices well. It makes them feel good if
>they say hi, and she knows who they are. So if she doesn't know
>right away and asks what their name is, they will say something like
>"You know me, Lily, listen to my voice and try to guess..."
>
>I HATE THIS! What if every time you started talking to someone you
>had to guess who they were?!?
>How have other people handled this one?? I need some suggestions. I
>have said things in the past to people about it, and about not
>treating her like she is a baby, or like she is AMAZING just because
>she can do the simplest little things, (which feels so insulting to
>me becasue she can do so much more that they have no idea about)
>etc. and about countless other things, but I always get a look back
>like I am such a mean mom or just a rude person in general. Does
>this just come with the territory of being a parent of a blind
>child? Help please :)
>
>Sorry for the spelling and grammar errors...I have to go, but wanted
>to quick get this in.
>kala
>
>
> > From: carrie.gilmer at gmail.com> To: blindkid at nfbnet.org> Date:
> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 08:45:28 -0600> Subject: [blindkid] Identify
> yourself please> > Hi All, Especially to our blind colleagues and
> friends.> > > > I have one thing with Jordan that has improved but
> still is an "issue". I> think it bugs me way more than him, and
> likely that is why it is still an> "issue".> > > > Jordan often
> does not ask people to identify themselves. It is one thing,> and
> understandable to me, when he is in the very crowded school
> hallways and> some voice calls out, "hey Jordan!" in a passing
> greeting and he simply> calls back hey-but has no idea who that hey
> came from and to not yell out in> a crowd "hey who are
> you?",> > > > But there are many times.> > At the state fair, in a
> store, even at a lunch room table!, where he THINKS> he is talking
> to one person and discovers mid-conversation that is not who> he is
> talking with (and never says anything or finds in the end who it
> was),> or we walk away from the
> teen working the register or who has come up in> Best Buy and said
> "hello" and I ask "Who was that?" and he says I have no> idea. I
> know that sometimes because he is one of 3,000 at school-and>
> because he has the one and only thing, a lot more people know who
> he is than> vice versa and sometimes he really doesn't know who
> they are, but not> uncommonly it is evident the kid who is greeting
> him, he should know, but he> doesn't ask. I know that sometimes he
> thinks it is rude, if the other kid> thinks Jordan should know who
> they are.the same way if I forget someone's> name and I should
> definitely know it, and I am thinking how can I ask> without
> offending?...But many times he is just too "shy" about it. I have>
> seen on the student list before threads where lots of kids are
> somewhat> uncomfortable with this one. Any strategies that you
> blind folks have come> up with to gain the confidence or decide
> when to do it? Is it just a> personality thing, because I know many
> blind folks who are
> not shy about it> and simply say, "Who are you?"> > > > Should I
> just let this one go now as a mom-especially since he is now a>
> senior in high school? > > > > Carrie Gilmer, President> > National
> Organization of Parents of Blind Children> > A Division of the
> National Federation of the Blind> > NFB National Center:
> 410-659-9314> > Home Phone: 763-784-8590> >
> carrie.gilmer at gmail.com> > www.nfb.org/nopbc> > > >
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