[blindkid] Seeking advice: blind daughter intentionallyexcluded from birthday party

Brandy with Discovery Toys branlw at sbcglobal.net
Wed Oct 29 00:59:45 UTC 2008


Hi, I wasn't going to reply since I'm not a parent, but I can't get your 
post of my mind. First I doubt the school knows or realizes because she 
wasn't in the room when it happened, and it was just 1 kid. That being said 
my mad side says to go with your friend whether you play dumb and bring him 
a gift and say that you heard from several parents and you just thought you 
some how didn't get the invitation. But the logical side says if your friend 
really wants tlo help I'd ask her to talk to the dad about his concern. Just 
that What is your concern of not inviting your daughter. Then your friend 
can share with the family that your daughter loves the place and was hurt 
she wasn't invited. This could be a teachable moment. Just some ideas. Bran
"We all have our time machines. Some take us back, they're called memories. 
Some take us forward, they're called dreams."
Jeremy Irons

Brandy Wojcik
Discovery Toys Group Manager and Educational Consultant

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----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Andy & Sally Thomas" <andysally at comcast.net>
To: "NFBnet Blind Kid Mailing List,(for parents of blind children)" 
<blindkid at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Tuesday, October 28, 2008 6:11 PM
Subject: Re: [blindkid] Seeking advice: blind daughter intentionallyexcluded 
from birthday party


> I'm surprised that the school allowed this to happen.  In the many schools 
> my kids have attended, if invitations were handed out at school then all 
> children in the class had to be invited.  That being said, maybe you could 
> invite your child's friend to go with you and Milagro to the bounce place 
> at a time both kids could enjoy it.  That way the friend wouldn't miss a 
> fun play time and your daughter could have fun with a friend.
>
> Sally Thomas
> ----- Original Message ----- 
> From: "Grace Sato" <gracets at covad.net>
> To: <blindkid at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, October 28, 2008 5:38 PM
> Subject: [blindkid] Seeking advice: blind daughter intentionally excluded 
> from birthday party
>
>
>> Because I'm sure parents on this list have lived this, I'm going to ask.
>> I've been trying to forget about this, but you know how things nag at
>> you and you can't let go?
>>
>> Here goes:
>>
>> I found out over the weekend that my daughter's first grade class was
>> invited to the birthday party of a classmate (Logan).
>> Apparently Logan's parents took invitations for all the kids and the
>> class and distributed them as school ended on Friday.
>>
>> I knew none of this until I spent Sunday with one of the boys in my
>> daughter's class (Chance), and his mom, as we visited a cool Children's
>> Discovery Museum together and she asked in the car if my daughter would
>> be attending the party on November 1st.
>>
>> The party will be held at "Pump It Up", an inflatables party place
>> (think large inflatable slides, bouncy castle, mazes, etc).
>> My daughter loves this place and attended two birthday parties there
>> before when in preschool and kindergarten.
>>
>> Because this little boy (Chance) is my daughter's best friend in school,
>> the one we spend the most time with, his mom decided to ask Logan's dad
>> directly if Milagro, "Chance's best friend in class", had been invited.
>> She told me he looked at her funny and said, "No."
>>
>> She asked if everyone else in the class had been invited and he said
>> yes. So, Chance's mom and I are concluding that Milagro has been
>> excluded, probably because the family thinks a blind child doesn't
>> belong in a bouncy inflatables place.
>>
>> Now, I don't know this boy Logan and his parents don't know me, so I
>> mostly don't care. I doubt Milagro knows she's been excluded because she
>> was in SDC at the end of the school day. But.....now Chance's mom is
>> going to boycott the party (not take Chance) in protest of Milagro being
>> excluded. Sweet gesture, but that's what's causing me grief.
>>
>> I feel (almost) obligated to do something, but not sure what?  Would you
>> please share your wisdom with me on this? Part of me wants to crash the
>> party to show her classmates that she's as adventurous and strong as
>> they are (and more so in most cases). The rest of me says, "save your
>> energy".
>>
>> What do you think? What have you done in these situations when your
>> child has been excluded socially due to someone else's ignorance? Should
>> I just do nothing and beg Chance's mom to just take him and tell her I
>> appreciate the gesture?
>>
>> Such drama.....I know. And it's only first grade!  Thanks!
>>
>> Grace in California
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
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>
>
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