[blindkid] Training wheels

[Merry-Noel Chamberlain]

Carlton,
Thanks so much.  As it is now, my mother lives so far away - Ashleah will never know unless my mom says something on the phone.  I will forward your note to her.
Thanks.
Merry-Noel




________________________________
From: Carlton Anne Cook Walker <attorneywalker at gmail.com>
To: blindkid at nfbnet.org
Sent: Sunday, March 29, 2009 6:13:13 PM
Subject: [blindkid] Training wheels

Merry-Noel,

Like others, I believe that this should be child-driven -- to an extent.

Personally, as a fully-sighted individual, I did not graduate from training
wheels until I was 12 or 13.  This caused my father and grandparents great
distress -- distress and disappointment of which I was fully aware.
Luckily, my mother shielded me (as much as she could) from them.
Eventually, I got it.  I simply was not physically ready (as a result of
poor balance) until I got older.  From then on, I was fine.  However, I
still can feel the disappointment that I caused my father and grandparents.
Their feelings towards me made me feel like a failure.


Please tell grandmom to LAY OFF!  Children know when they disappoint adults
in their lives -- and the pain of being a disappointment does not ease with
time.  Even now, when I see Anna Catherine skipping around, I can hear my
grandmother (who was honestly a loving and wonderful woman) complaining that
I was unable to skip at age 11 (despite many, many hours she spent trying to
teach me).  Please feel free to share my story with grandmom to show her how
pain does not wash away over time.


Now, I said it should be child-driven "within reason."  I say this because
sometimes a child will want to rid him/herself of training wheels too soon.
Peer pressure is pushing Anna Catherine toward this.  We may experiment with
Holly's no pedal technique in the grass this summer.  I am not so concerned
about Anna Catherine getting hurt physically -- I am concerned that she will
quit riding her bike at all if she cannot do it as a to-wheeler.  So long as
(1) the child truly wants to ride 2-wheeled, (2) the child is physically
capable of sustaining speed/balance to accomplish this, and (3) the child is
emotionally resilient enough to recover from "failure" if s/he is not yet
ready to ride 2-wheeled, I see no problems with experimenting with 2-wheeled
bicycling.


Above all, I advise against pushing a child when s/he is not yet ready.
Doing so can cause unnecessary damage to the child and his/her self-esteem.



Carlton


-- 
Carlton Anne Cook Walker
213 North First Street
McConnellsburg, PA    17233
Voice: 717-485-4529
Cell: 717-658-9894
Twitter: braillemom
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