[blindkid] Dealing with selfish behavior

Mon Jun 2 02:09:41 UTC 2014

Hi Traci and all,

While I think that getting blind kids involved in volunteerism is
great for many reasons, I'm not sure it really addresses her issues
with behaving selfishly. I suspect that she is acting this way at
least in part because it is hard for her to take another's
perspective, as it is for many kids including myself when I was her
age. I wonder if requiring her to go along on your or her brother's
errands, for example, might teach her how obnoxious it is when someone
else is calling all the shots or making her do things she doesn't
enjoy doing. It could also be a good way to teach compromise, if she
has to go along on an outing or activity someone else enjoys and she
doesn't, but then in return if she is cooperative she can choose the
next outing or activity for the family.
I also think that sometimes blind kids can put on a bossy front to
regain control in environments where much of the action is
inaccessible to them. If all the kids on the playground are playing
sports that aren't adapted or are excluding a blind child from their
games, the blind child's best defense may be to come up with
activities she can do and then demand the other kids join her in those
activities. It's worth making sure that the popular social activities,
sports, etc. her peers are participating in are fully accessible so
she is not limited to just one or two options.

Best,
Arielle

On 6/1/14, oandemom . via blindkid <blindkid at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> Oooh, I know just the church thrift store where she can do that!  :)
>
> Thanks for the tip!
>
> Traci
>
>
> On Sun, Jun 1, 2014 at 5:46 PM, Marianne Denning <marianne at denningweb.com>
> wrote:
>
>> I had a blind student and her Mom took her to fold and hang clothes at
>> a church where people can go to get clothing when they need this help.
>>  It accomplished two things.  The student learned to fold and hang
>> clothes very well and she learned to give back.  I tell all of my
>> students that we need to move beyond independence to interdependence.
>> It is important that blind people give back as well as receive.
>>
>> On 6/1/14, oandemom . via blindkid <blindkid at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>> > Hello!  I have a daughter, 9 and VI, who tends to be bossy and selfish.
>>  I
>> > feel I have to watch her interact with other children b/c she has a
>> strong
>> > personality and she wants to control what is being played.  I do my best
>> on
>> > this front.   Lately she has been very selfish, unless it is something
>> that
>> > benefits her, she isn't interested (you would think she is a teenager!)
>> > -
>> > its very frustrating.  We talk about how she isn't allowed to disrupt
>> > our
>> > family with her behavior (I do have some guidance from a special
>> > behavior
>> > preschool that she attended but I'm going off what I remember back then,
>> > but she attended mostly due to her social skills) - that she has to be a
>> > helpful part of this family and do as she is told, etc.  Today, I have
>> been
>> > reduced to making her write something 100 times because I just don't
>> > know
>> > what to do with her anymore.
>> >
>> > I am trying to find some volunteer opportunities to have her give of her
>> > time to help others and to think of others, but I know she will think it
>> is
>> > fun, b/c she is "working"  - she loves to work.  She may like it for 5
>> min
>> > and then be done, so it may actually work out okay, but I need to try
>> > it.
>> > I thought of soup kitchens, but she won't get that visual effect that is
>> > what I'm really looking for to make her have an appreciation of what she
>> > does have.
>> >
>> > I don't really think taking things away from her will work, b/c she
>> doesn't
>> > even know half the stuff in her room, she is so out of sight, out of
>> mind.
>> >
>> > Does anyone know of any volunteer activities that they have done or seen
>> > that a 9 year could be included in and really get something out of it.
>>  We
>> > talk all the time about how there are many kids who don't have what she
>> > has, etc etc, but it just doesn't click with her, as I'm sure it doesn't
>> > for many kids her age.
>> >
>> > I would appreciate ANY suggestions!!!
>> >
>> > Thanks,
>> > Traci
>> > _______________________________________________
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>> >
>>
>>
>> --
>> Marianne Denning, TVI, MA
>> Teacher of students who are blind or visually impaired
>> (513) 607-6053
>>
>
>
>
> --
> Traci Wilkerson
> Cell – 919-971-6526
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