[blindlaw] Tone and more on notes

Sun Oct 11 02:47:49 UTC 2015

Thanks Susan for the feedback.  As far as the sunglasses go, I wear them for reducing bright lights and they also increase the contrast inside which improves my vision.

This was a person in a position and not a personal acquaintance.  I almost feel he didn't realize that was not something he should say.  It might be different if he were not in the position he is in.  I wondered if he had said that to someone else that was not so easygoing if that person be really offended by it.   It almost felt as if he said don't use and insert any other blindness product you want and if you didn't use that item you would be more approachable.  I usually don't get offended but it kind of offended me a little.

Again thank you for the perspective.

Aimee

Sent from my iPhone

> On Oct 10, 2015, at 9:57 PM, Susan Tabor via blindlaw <blindlaw at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> 
> Hi, Aimee:
> 
> I see nothing at all wrong with the tone of any of your emails.  The only
> suggestion that I might make is that when you ask for something to explain
> why it is important that you receive what you're asking for.  And it's not
> essential that you do so; it just is an opportunity to educate people about
> the reasons behind why we're asking what we ask for.  And I hate to be
> cynical, but it might upset someone if you were as sweet as pie and said
> please and thank you, because blind people are thought to be pushy when
> asking for things; all we're doing is advocating for ourselves; sometimes
> it's other people's value systems that are the problem, and yes, it is
> important for us to at the same time be as courteous and considerate as we
> can be while being firm about our issues.
> 
> Then there's the sunglasses thing:  OMG! People will be put off if you wear
> them, and put off if you don't.  I finally did stop wearing them because I
> finally decided that if people had difficulty looking at me because my eyes
> didn't look "normal", that it really wasn't my problem, and after getting
> used to it, it really wouldn't matter so much to them anyway.  People had
> asked me to start wearing the glasses because it might be easier for people
> to look at me with them on.  Then they couldn't look at me with them on
> because they hid my face. (Sigh!)
> 
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blindlaw [mailto:blindlaw-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Aimee
> Harwood via blindlaw
> Sent: Saturday, October 10, 2015 8:43 PM
> To: Blind Law Mailing List
> Cc: Aimee Harwood
> Subject: [blindlaw] Tone and more on notes
> 
> Hello everyone.  
> 
> I have two issues I would like feedback on in this message. (1) I have made
> some requests regarding notes that just so happens to be in one of the
> emails that was mentioned in a discussion about the tone of my email this
> Friday.  (2) I would like some feedback on some emails to make sure I am not
> doing things inappropriately.
> 
> Issue (1) I requested in an email to the individual handling accommodations
> that notes be sent by the end of business that day because I had received
> some late and sometimes I had received Friday's notes on Monday.  Is this an
> unreasonable request? Notes are typed by the person in class and sent
> directly to the person that sends them to me.
> 
> (2) While in the office talking about dropping a class, the person handling
> accommodations informed me that I had done a bad thing for myself.  This
> comment was in reference to an email I had sent to the county BAR
> Association in reply to an email that was an image containing information of
> some kind.  I had apparently come across bossy and the association was
> unhappy with me.  He also said that the secretary that sends my notes felt I
> was being bossy in reference to an email I had sent to her.  I think the
> accommodations person also felt that an email I sent him was also bossy but
> made it sound as if the email I sent went to the secretary when in fact it
> went to him.  When I went back to check (because I never delete email) I
> verified that email actually went to him.  I was reminded at this meeting
> that these people can make life easy for me or they can make it hard for me.
> 
> Below are the emails I sent in order of date.  I can see where someone could
> take the one to the BAR Association a little bit in the wrong way but am not
> so sure about the other two.  I would like some objective opinions on the
> tone of my messages.
> 
> My email I sent on September, 17 to the secretary that sends my notes to me;
> "Hello omitted name. I have not yet received my notes for today. Please send
> them before you leave for the day.
> 
> Aimee Harwood"
> 
> This is the email I sent to the person handling accommodation which was sent
> on September, 30..
> "I would like to request that notes be delivered by the end of the day.
> There have several times when Friday's notes showed up next Monday and
> others have showed up the following day.  Also I am working on something
> regarding books. I haven't forgotten our conversation.
> 
> Aimee"
> 
> Email sent to BAR Association  on October ,7 as a reply to an email that was
> an image.
> 
> "When sending PDFs or any other image with text, please make sure the text
> is available for access with scream reading applications. I have no clue
> what you want me to get from this message because it is not accessible.
> 
> Aimee Harwood"
> 
> If I am in the wrong in any way please let me know.  I don't want to appear
> that way but also want to be able to advocate for myself as well.  There
> were no all caps words or exclamation points in any of the emails.  I am in
> Pennsylvania if it matters.  I really appreciate anything you guys have to
> say regarding this.
> 
> So one last thing.  Has anyone ever been told that they would be more
> approachable if they did not wear their sunglasses?  If so, how did you
> respond to that?
> 
> Aimee
> 
> Sent from my iPhone
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