[Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind

Steve P. Deeley stevep.deeley at insightbb.com
Sun May 31 14:36:49 UTC 2009


Wow, that's not very nice or professional.
Steve
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Jeffrey Schwartz" <sidney.schwartz at sbcglobal.net>
To: "'NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List'" <blindtlk at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Saturday, May 30, 2009 8:49 PM
Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind


> I'm probably old enough to be your father or grandfather.  You sound like 
> a
> drugged out adolescent with your energy pathways, meridians and finally,
> "perhaps my energy didn't reach your ears".  Your energy wouldn't reach my
> ears if you were in the house next to mine.  Next, you'll be talking about
> astrological signs.  Grow up you foolish child.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of trishs
> Sent: Saturday, May 30, 2009 4:07 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind
>
> Hey, Schwartz!
> #1.  When did I "assume that all credible knowledge lies with in
> Western culture.?"
> #2.  I "misapplied the vast body of Eastern wisdom", how?"
> Correct me if I'm wrong, but no where did I see myself
> disrespectful to Eastern, or Western culture.
> Being ignorant of customs, I have great respect for Eastern
> wisdom.  Just brushing the surface, through Massage Therapy
> training was one of the most interesting, complicated, and
> difficult things I've ever done.
> Miss.  chauvinistic, childish, and ignorant hear, never made any
> such claim.  I mentioned the words touch, intension, energy, and
> meridian.  So.  Because you've never heard of a meridian, I don't
> know what I'm talking about?
> I'd be willing to bet there's an Eastern word for things like
> your defensive name calling.  In Western terms, it's called Get a
> grip!
>
>> ----- Original Message -----
>>From: "Jeffrey Schwartz" <sidney.schwartz at sbcglobal.net
>>To: "'NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List'" <blindtlk at nfbnet.org
>>Date sent: Sat, 30 May 2009 09:18:49 -0400
>>Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind
>
>>It is chauvinistic to assume that all credible  knowledge resides
> within
>>Western culture.  It is childish and ignorant to misapply the
> vast body of
>>Eastern wisdom.
>>-----Original Message-----
>>From: blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org
> [mailto:blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
>>Behalf Of trishs
>>Sent: Friday, May 29, 2009 11:29 PM
>>To: NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List
>>Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind
>
>>Excuse me.  Perhaps my words touched your ears, and you've
>>misunderstood them?  Or, perhaps I wasn't quite following the
>>thread?  It's possible.  I make mistakes from time to time, too.
>>No worries!
>
>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>From: "Jeffrey Schwartz" <sidney.schwartz at sbcglobal.net
>>>To: "'NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List'" <blindtlk at nfbnet.org
>>>Date sent: Thu, 28 May 2009 17:25:41 -0400
>>>Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind
>
>>>Sorry, but I still have no idea what you are talking about, nor
>>do you.
>
>>>-----Original Message-----
>>>From: blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org
>>[mailto:blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
>>>Behalf Of trishs
>>>Sent: Thursday, May 28, 2009 7:28 AM
>>>To: NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List
>>>Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind
>
>>>This applied to the intension of touch.
>
>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>>From: "Jeffrey Schwartz" <sidney.schwartz at sbcglobal.net
>>>>To: "'NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List'" <blindtlk at nfbnet.org
>>>>Date sent: Wed, 27 May 2009 17:11:23 -0400
>>>>Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind
>
>>>>And just what does this have to do with touching or being
>>>touched?  Can you
>>>>tell which organ someone is touching you with by its energy
>>>pathway?
>>>>-----Original Message-----
>>>>From: blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org
>>>[mailto:blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
>>>>Behalf Of trishs
>>>>Sent: Wednesday, May 27, 2009 12:15 PM
>>>>To: NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List
>>>>Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind
>
>>>>In Eastern medicine it's called a meridian.  There are energy
>>>>channels which correspond to each body organ, which Eastern
>>>>cultures have mapped for about as long as there's been medicine.
>
>>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>>>From: "Jeffrey Schwartz" <sidney.schwartz at sbcglobal.net
>>>>>To: "'NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List'" <blindtlk at nfbnet.org
>>>>>Date sent: Tue, 26 May 2009 21:09:33 -0400
>>>>>Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind
>
>>>>>What in the world is an "energy Pathway"
>
>>>>>-----Original Message-----
>>>>>From: blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org
>>>>[mailto:blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
>>>>>Behalf Of trishs
>>>>>Sent: Tuesday, May 26, 2009 11:51 AM
>>>>>To: NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List
>>>>>Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind
>
>>>>>As far as "across the board answers", and people getting "mad",
>>>>>we each have the power and self responsibility to say I'm
>>>>>uncomfortable with that," or "Stop it! That's inappropriate!"  Or
>>>>>"Could you do that again?"  I feel as though I can speak for most
>>>>>people when I say that we have all been in situations where a
>>>>>person's touch "creeped us out", or made us want more.  There are
>>>>>many types of touch, and it is ALL ABOUT INTENSION, which is
>>>>>carried through invisible energy pathways.
>>>>>There are also times when we misunderstand, or misinterpret
>>>>>someone's touch.  It can be difficult to navigate these energy
>>>>>pathways, so your power is in your own intension for your own
>>>>>comfort level.
>
>>>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>>>>From: "Steve P.  Deeley" <stevep.deeley at insightbb.com
>>>>>>To: "NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List" <blindtlk at nfbnet.org
>>>>>>Date sent: Tue, 26 May 2009 08:47:07 -0400
>>>>>>Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind
>
>>>>>>It has nothing to do with blindness in my case.  I just hate
>>>>>being touched.
>
>>>>>>Steve
>>>>>>----- Original Message -----
>>>>>>From: "dewey bradley" <dewey.bradley at gmail.com
>>>>>>To: "NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List" <blindtlk at nfbnet.org
>>>>>>Sent: Monday, May 25, 2009 8:40 PM
>>>>>>Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind
>
>
>>>>>>> Allot of sighted people think that they can't talk to us without
>>>>>putting
>>>>>>> there hands on us.
>>>>>>> The thing is allot of people like my self really hate to be
>>>>>touched, When
>>>>>>> we
>>>>>>> ask them to please take there hands off, they get mad.
>>>>>>> I guess there is no across the board answer for things like
>>>>>this.
>>>>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>>>>> From: "Steve P.  Deeley" <stevep.deeley at insightbb.com
>>>>>>> To: "NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List" <blindtlk at nfbnet.org
>>>>>>> Sent: Monday, May 25, 2009 10:42 AM
>>>>>>> Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind
>
>
>>>>>>>> This is a very complicated topic.  There are those, like me, who
>>>>>don't
>>>>>>>> like being touched during conversations with individuals I
>>>>>really don't
>>>>>>>> know very well.  I'm wondering if blind individuals understand
>>>>>spacial
>>>>>>>> concepts during conversations.  You don't want to be too close
>>>>>during a
>>>>>>>> conversation or too far away.  I suspect most of us who
>>>>>understand this
>>>>>>>> art have had some coaching from sighted individuals whom they
>>>>>trust.
>>>>>>>> \
>>>>>>>> Steve
>>>>>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>>>>>> From: "trishs" <slosser at metrocast.net
>>>>>>>> To: "NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List" <blindtlk at nfbnet.org
>>>>>>>> Sent: Sunday, May 24, 2009 10:46 PM
>>>>>>>> Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind
>
>
>>>>>>>>>I was raised giving and receiving warm hand shakes, or in some
>>>>>>>>> situations, embraces and or kisses, all of which seem to me to
>>>>>be
>>>>>>>>> quite germ spreading!  I like the bowing idea a lot!
>
>>>>>>>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>>>>>>>>From: Joel Zimba <jzimba at cavtel.net
>>>>>>>>>>To: NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List <blindtlk at nfbnet.org
>>>>>>>>>>Date sent: Sat, 23 May 2009 17:08:35 -0400
>>>>>>>>>>Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings; Behaviors in adults blind
>
>>>>>>>>>>Hi,
>
>>>>>>>>>>I love these kinds of topics.  I believe the issue of blind or
>>>>>>>>> sighted
>>>>>>>>>>is mostly meaningless when it comes to whether you should touch
>>>>>>>>> someone
>>>>>>>>>>or not.  It comes down more to how comfortable you are with what
>>>>>>>>> you are
>>>>>>>>>>doing and your motivation for it.
>
>>>>>>>>>>The examples of folks talking with their hands is a great one.
>>>>>>>>> It's not
>>>>>>>>>>so much that they talk with their hands, but that touching is a
>>>>>>>>> means of
>>>>>>>>>>communication.  In fact, if you are comfortable enough with
>>>>>>>>> yurself to
>>>>>>>>>>touch someone else while speaking to them, you'll pull them into
>>>>>>>>> your
>>>>>>>>>>paradigm.  This is common wisdom in the sales world.
>
>>>>>>>>>>For the blind among us, (myself included) this is most easily
>>>>>>>>> donw with
>>>>>>>>>>the back of the hand and making solid contact.
>
>>>>>>>>>>When it comes to shaking hands, I decided to take the initiative
>>>>>>>>> early
>>>>>>>>>>and often.  When someone doesn't take my hand, I leave it out
>>>>>>>>> there and
>>>>>>>>>>then eventually start snapping my fingers.  This calls attention
>>>>>>>>> to the
>>>>>>>>>>fact that the other people are not playing the social game.  I
>>>>>>>>> was
>>>>>>>>>>taught that it is not obligatory for women to shake hands.  Long
>>>>>>>>> ago I
>>>>>>>>>>decided that if women want equal rights, they can do the glad
>>>>>>>>> handing as
>>>>>>>>>>well, so I expect them to shake and I do the snapping as well.  I
>>>>>>>>>>sometimes let the elderly off the hook, though oddly, the older
>>>>>>>>> someone
>>>>>>>>>>is, the more likely they are to initiate or take my hand.  Proper
>>>>>>>>>>conduct seems to not always be taught to the younger generation.
>>>>>>>>> Maybe
>>>>>>>>>>we all need to go back to finishing school.
>
>>>>>>>>>>Now, if someone could explain the bowing protocol to me so that
>>>>>>>>> my Asian
>>>>>>>>>>friends would be surprised and pleased by my manners, I would be
>>>>>>>>> very
>>>>>>>>>>greatful.
>
>>>>>>>>>>Joel
>
>>>>>>>>>>On 5/23/2009 12:40 PM, Jeffrey Schwartz wrote:
>>>>>>>>>>> Hi Gerardo,
>>>>>>>>>>> I am also blind as a result of RP and a clinical psychologist.
>>>>>>>>> My vision
>>>>>>>>>>> deteriorated at a different pace.  I drove a car until I was 27
>>>>>>>>> and did not
>>>>>>>>>>> require adaptive technology to read and write until I was about
>>>>>>>>> 40.  Now, at
>>>>>>>>>>> 61, I have little more than light perception.  When younger, I
>>>>>>>>> was often
>>>>>>>>>>> embarrassed when my wife kindly noted that someone was reaching
>>>>>>>>> out to shake
>>>>>>>>>>> my hand and I was not noticing.  Eventually, I learned to avoid
>>>>>>>>> this problem
>>>>>>>>>>> by taking the initiative.  On occasion I reach out to discover
>>>>>>>>> that the
>>>>>>>>>>> person has quickly turned their back or departed, no big deal.
>>>>>>>>> I have had
>>>>>>>>>>> no experience with the touching.  There are cultural differences
>>>>>>>>> in such
>>>>>>>>>>> nonverbal behaviors.  For example, cultures vary in terms of
>>>>>>>>> what is
>>>>>>>>>>> regarded as personal space.  Groups vary in terms of how close
>>>>>>>>> they stand to
>>>>>>>>>>> each other when speaking, and also with regard to touching which
>>>>>>>>> is common
>>>>>>>>>>> in some cultures and taboo in others.  Perhaps your blindness
>>>>>>>>> has led you to
>>>>>>>>>>> exceed what is common in your culture or your parents may have
>>>>>>>>> felt bad for
>>>>>>>>>>> you when they saw you reach out to touch someone and the person
>>>>>>>>> had
>>>>>>>>>>> departed.  There are also a group of behaviors known as
>>>>>>>>> blindisms.  We all
>>>>>>>>>>> conduct little rituals of personal hygiene when alone which we
>>>>>>>>> would not do
>>>>>>>>>>> in front of others.  There is a tendency, particularly if one
>>>>>>>>> loses their
>>>>>>>>>>> vision gradually to assume that others see as we do.  I am often
>>>>>>>>> surprised
>>>>>>>>>>> by what others can see.  We assume that if we can't see
>>>>>>>>> something others can
>>>>>>>>>>> not either.  This can lead us to embarrass ourselves by
>>>>>>>>> performing these
>>>>>>>>>>> grooming rituals in public.  Recently, I have noticed that when
>>>>>>>>> I am walking
>>>>>>>>>>> and thinking about a conversation which I had or will have with
>>>>>>>>> someone, I
>>>>>>>>>>> am moving my lips as if I were speaking.  I am working on
>>>>>>>>> suppressing this
>>>>>>>>>>> behavior as I am certain that the sighted would see it as
>>>>>>>>> strange.  Behavior
>>>>>>>>>>> is so ritualized, and blindness can lead us to engage in some
>>>>>>>>> peculiar ones.
>>>>>>>>>>> As professionals, in particular, we don't want to be seen as odd
>>>>>>>>> or
>>>>>>>>>>> idiosyncratic.
>>>>>>>>>>> Jeff
>
>>>>>>>>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>>>>>>>>> From: blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org
>>>>>>>>> [mailto:blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
>>>>>>>>>>> Behalf Of Cindy Handel
>>>>>>>>>>> Sent: Saturday, May 23, 2009 9:55 AM
>>>>>>>>>>> To: NFBnet Blind Talk Mailing List
>>>>>>>>>>> Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Greetings;Behaviors in adults blind
>
>>>>>>>>>>> Gerardo,
>
>>>>>>>>>>> Most of the time, when I would like to shake the hand of a
>>>>>>>>> sighted person, I
>
>>>>>>>>>>> just extend my hand and they grasp it and we shake hands.
>
>>>>>>>>>>> As far as touching the arm of people, I've never done this.
>>>>>>>>> When do you do
>>>>>>>>>>> this?  If you're talking with someone, it shouldn't be
>>>>>>>>> necessary, since
>>>>>>>>>>> they're participating in the conversation.  I think we've all
>>>>>>>>> experienced a
>>>>>>>>>>> time when we're talking to someone and learn that they walked
>>>>>>>>> away.  Now, if
>
>>>>>>>>>>> you're referring to touching a person's arm to make sure they're
>>>>>>>>> still there
>
>>>>>>>>>>> as a way to insure that you still have their attention, that's
>>>>>>>>> something
>>>>>>>>>>> different.  I have met sighted people who talk with their hands
>>>>>>>>> and touch my
>
>>>>>>>>>>> arm or shoulder, for emphasis.  So, that might not be so
>>>>>>>>> unusual.
>
>>>>>>>>>>> Cindy
>>>>>>>>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>>>>>>>>> From: "Gerardo Corripio"<gera1027 at prodigy.net.mx
>>>>>>>>>>> To: "Blind-Talk"<blindtlk at nfbnet.org
>>>>>>>>>>> Sent: Friday, May 22, 2009 11:35 PM
>>>>>>>>>>> Subject: [Blindtlk] Greetings;Behaviors in adults blind
>
>
>>>>>>>>>>> Hi listers:
>>>>>>>>>>> I'm Gerardo from Mexico; 31 years old and a Psychologist working
>>>>>>>>> on my own
>>>>>>>>>>> in my private practice.
>>>>>>>>>>> Hopefully I'll be able to learn lots of great things from you
>>>>>>>>> guys,
>>>>>>>>>>> especially of the NFB way of viewing and living with blindness.
>>>>>>>>>>> Now for my debut question: I've been blind all my life due to
>>>>>>>>> RP; since I
>>>>>>>>>>> was a teenager I remember developing a habbit of touching the
>>>>>>>>> arm of the
>>>>>>>>>>> people constanly to be sure he/she was still there.  I continued
>>>>>>>>> to do this
>>>>>>>>>>> into adulthood until my family made the observation that this
>>>>>>>>> behavior isn't
>>>>>>>>>>> seen well by the sighted only a few days ago.  I'm still shocked
>>>>>>>>> by this
>>>>>>>>>>> observation to the point that now how to know if the person is
>>>>>>>>> still there?
>>>>>>>>>>> Yes, the voice gives feedback but when people talk it feels as
>>>>>>>>> if they're
>>>>>>>>>>> there but aren't there.  How have you coped with this situation
>>>>>>>>> in that you
>>>>>>>>>>> have to get rid of the habbit before-mentioned? Surely it has
>>>>>>>>> happened to
>>>>>>>>>>> some of you?
>>>>>>>>>>> also when shaking hands with sighted people how to find the hand
>>>>>>>>> to shake if
>>>>>>>>>>> the sighted person doesn't take the initiative?
>>>>>>>>>>> As you can see I've still have lots of tips and tricks to learn
>>>>>>>>> about
>>>>>>>>>>> blindness, thus my interest in joining the list.
>>>>>>>>>>> Gerardo
>
>
>>>>>>>>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>>>>>>>>> blindtlk mailing list
>>>>>>>>>>> blindtlk at nfbnet.org
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>
>>>>>http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blindtlk_nfbnet.org/cindy42
>>>>>>>>> 5%40verizon
>>>>>>>>>>> .net
>
>
>
>>>>>>>>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>>>>>>>>> blindtlk mailing list
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>
>>>>>http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blindtlk_nfbnet.org/sidney.
>>>>>>>>> schwartz%40
>>>>>>>>>>> sbcglobal.net
>
>
>>>>>>>>>>> _______________________________________________
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>
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>>>>>deeley%40insightbb.com
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>
>
>>>>>-----------------------------------------------------------------
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>
>
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>>>>>Date:
>>>>>>>> 05/24/09
>>>>>>>> 07:09:00
>
>
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