[Blindtlk] Inferiority complex with disability vs nondisabledsociety

[Gary Wunder]

Peter, you have asked many questions and I am certain in one sitting I can't 
begin to response to them all. Even this assumes I know all the answers, 
which I most certainly do not.

I throw out these ideas and observations with the suggestion that you take 
what you like and leave the rest. It does no good to compare yourself with 
what you might have been. In the first place, you don't know what you might 
have been. I might be angry because my Dad was the owner of a successful 
construction business which I could have run and might be far better off 
financially than I am now. Without sight, I can't run the heavy equipment so 
perhaps I should be angry. Because I am blind, I traveled a different road, 
went to college, got a degree, and work as a computer programmer. That 
college experience introduced me to good books, to different thoughts about 
the world, and to a tolerance of other people I'd never have gotten had I 
stayed at home. Which life is the better? Unfortunately this is a question 
without an answer. I have to make of my life what is possible, without 
spending too much time grieving about some alternative future.
In your note you acknowledge a lot of problems. Acknowledging one has a 
problem is often the first step on the road to solving it, but sometimes 
that acknowledgement is simply a way of stating the problem and the more we 
state it, the more we come to like the way we say it. We grow accustomed to 
the burden of that problem, and rather than using our admission to solve it, 
we carry it like a badge of honor.

In my own work, I can tell you that blineness makes many things hard which 
others find easy. They see computer screens and what is wanted from them is 
obvious. I hear computer screens and have to often work pretty hard to 
figure out what is wanted and where I am on the screen. I can make a real 
case for how disadvantaged this makes me, but the more important thing is 
that I figure it out and be productive enough I can bring home a pay check.

You talk about the country in which you were born. There may be better 
countries in which to be blind, but I am certain the majority are worse. In 
your country you have the opportunity to make a contract with our people. 
That contract says that we, all of us, will help you with training and 
equipment if, in return, you will try your hardest to take that equipment 
and training and put it to a productive use - preferably a use which will 
pay you. You will then pay taxes, buy a home, support your local businesses, 
not to mention Wal-Mart, and everyone wins. Winning isn't easy, but it is 
far easier than carrying around the anger for what you might have been if 
only you had tried.

Take your anger and, if you can, turn it into resolve. Look at your 
situation, acknowledge there are disadvantages, and at the same time 
determine how you can benefit from where you find yourself. If you 
constantly live with the dream of driving the car you once had, you'll be 
disappointed. If you live with the dream of the dcar which may come to be if 
we who are blind work together, then your sadness may just become a tool for 
hope.

I wish you all the luck in the world, and where luck stops and personal 
responsibility begins, I wish you the courage to take it on.