[Blindtlk] Inferiority complex with disability vs nondisabledsociety

Wed Jun 2 16:23:59 UTC 2010

Hi Peter,

Wow! That is a lot of anger and frustration there! The good news, though, is that you've come to the right place. 

Because, I sense your anger, frustration, and really want to help, I'll admit that I fall into the older/middle aged category, (smile) at age 47. I have been blind since age two, and have definitely "walked the streets." I have struggled with my own feelings of inferiority, anger and so forth because of messages I received as a child. I often still do, even within the blindness community,  but I am working on that. Let's focus on you though.

It sounds like what you need to do, before you settle on the educational goal, before you make any life altering decisions and so forth is to go for some adjustment to blindness training, preferably at one of our NFB training centers. We have a center in Louisiana, one in Colorado, and one in Minnesota. The training at our NFB centers is administered by the blind, and it is through this training and observing these role models that you will learn the alternative skills of blindness. You will learn how, by employing these skills, you can compete on terms of equality. You will learn that it really is okay to be blind, and you don't have to take a back seat to anyone, or define your life or your chosen career by your blindness.

You also need to reach out to your local chapter or state affiliate, and they can get you pointed in the right direction. Let us know where you are, and we can help make that connection for you. I apologize if you have mentioned your location before, and I have missed it.

Anyway, I realize that I didn't even begin to scratch the surface of the issues that are bubbling to the surface for you, but I think this is the place to start. Put your education on hold for just a little while, until you get that training and reassurance and are truly okay with who you are. If your local rehabilitation agency gives you problems about going to an NFB center, call on your state affiliate to help. It sounds like you really need that extra support.

I hope this helps to at least give you some hope and direction. Feel free to ask any questions.
Diane Graves
Civil Rights Specialist
Indiana Civil Rights Commission
Alternative Dispute Resolutions Unit
317-232-2647

"It is service that measures success."
George Washington Carver

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-----Original Message-----
From: blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Peter Wolfe
Sent: Wednesday, June 02, 2010 11:44 AM
To: Blind Talk Mailing List
Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Inferiority complex with disability vs nondisabled society

On 6/2/10, don nepple <dnepple at hotmail.com> wrote:
>
> hi try the nfb are you a mumber of chapter in your sstate thay can help you
> a lot thanks for the email good luck.don frum idaho.
>
> ----------------------------------------
>> Date: Wed, 2 Jun 2010 06:12:06 -0500
>> From: sunspot005 at gmail.com
>> To: blindtlk at nfbnet.org
>> Subject: [Blindtlk] Inferiority complex with disability vs nondisabled
>> society
>>
>> --
>> Peter
>> Webmaster
>> http://www.darkstruggle.com
>> webmaster at darkstruggle.com
>> alternative e-mail
>> sunspot005 at gmail.com
>>
>> To Blind Talk:
>>
>>
>> It's me Peter here and I would like to know what other blind people
>> out there think of this topic. I suffer from a inferiority complex
>> ever since I was a young child before knowing of my dormant vision
>> heredetary disease. It's like you know you might be good and you might
>> have heard it from others but you feel abandoned by those same people.
>> I always look at other people like what they must have had that I
>> didn't have as a child living in abdject poverty as a child. Then, I
>> point out intellectual minor flaws cause of a broken family,
>> uneducated parents, U.S overall poor educational standards and
>> differences from area to area, learning environments, and no real
>> positive role modles like having family members that have gone to
>> college. So, now I'm in college and am getting to a point of
>> quitlistening to people cause they can't understand.
>> Secondly, I measure myself through a overall scope like I am and
>> who I could have been if I were sighted like the rest of overall
>> society. When I was a child, I wanted to be a astronomer, computer
>> scientists, mathmatitian, psysist and such. Now, I look at all of the
>> wasted years like twenty-four years of only having a two year minor
>> associates degree and having changed my major three times at a major
>> four year university and pressure of picking that special major. I
>> want to have upward mobility with security without too much strings
>> attached and so much stress to pick. I often think of how to compete
>> with other undisabled furuter applicants or my degree becomes out of
>> date cause of stalls or something and am loke I screwed up. I wasted
>> government money, family money, time, energy and etc that could have
>> been spent on something better than little old me.
>> Thirdly, I blame myself for things beyond my control. Public
>> transportation, screen reader issues, paperwork, independence issues,
>> communication barriers in participation, entertainment fun and etc. If
>> I could only see to understand what others are doing I could be on the
>> same par of them. The same playng field cause I have had vision I miss
>> it even more. Does this make sense to anyone else on the list? The
>> thing is that I don't like is that nobody usually does at all cause
>> they sadly think I'm making excuses to drop out or change my major a
>> million times.
>> Fourthly, I look at the outcomes too much like the quarter of
>> gainfully employed blind people in the U.S. The often times
>> incompetent government workers from multiple sectors, inadaquate
>> research availible, unaccessible government resources, unwillingness
>> for overall society to change for universal accessability and etc is
>> appalling and hard for me. I want to change life but I can't even
>> adapt to this disappointment. Imagine going from practising driving
>> and going legally blind in the span of a few months. Couple that with
>> deep family problems and a incompetent government and you get me. Now,
>> I am becoming religious in a catholic sort of way cause it's my life.
>> Fifthly, I try out new things to constantly disappointment myself.
>> The old times is what I say like the majority of us formerly sighted
>> people think. The psychologists and others can't understand the
>> frustratiosn wheling up inside of me. The sin of anger, and envy and
>> blasophemy at times occurs cause I wish that I wasn't who I am right
>> now. Overall society is being burdened by my tremendous weight and all
>> I can do is lash out in anger. The fear of the unknown like most is
>> strong but even stronger with us blind people and especially someone
>> of my variety. Adapting a whole new prospective like playing real
>> visual games like Mortal Combat or Final Fantasy and none of this beep
>> bs you know? These visually impaired games are far too simplistic and
>> I hate to complain it's hard to measure up. Nothing is the same as it
>> once was anymore.
>> Sixthly, the feeling of alienation and osterizing myself in
>> overall society cause of the ultimate question for us blind people
>> when it comes to terms of help. Are they helping us because we are
>> human or our disability? This is a questions you often don't want to
>> ask cause you don't want to be rude but I'm putting on the table.
>> People often times forget that you can't see and you constantly must
>> educate over and over like over again about your vision. In my former
>> house, family members would leave chairs, clothes and crap where I
>> constantly ran into it even though they knew that I am blind. Another
>> thing the books on tape and othr arciac means should been gotten
>> transfered years ago and it makes you wonder about advocacy on our
>> ends here. The accessability of our currency should have happened
>> decades and anything for us takes forever. It makes me depressed
>> because the prospects of things in a sitable measurable way to the way
>> it was is like a pipe dream or somehting. Where independence, freedom,
>> respect and etc as a normal american is too far for me to reach
>> anymore. The sense of powerless gets strong man.
>> Seventh, the adaptation too religion has been tough as well like
>> the customs, traditions, respcts, manners and roles of being a
>> christian can be tough. The habits are hard to overcome especially not
>> being born into a religion can be tough. You naturally revert at times
>> of confusion or of low self-esteem to your natural state. Mine is
>> depression, anxiety, hate, envy, and all of that nice stuff.
>> Eightly, the amount of time for things like preperation has been
>> hard to deal with for these years of blindness like setting up public
>> transportation, waiting for a taxi or friends, mobility traning or
>> orientation, sighted assistance on appointments (e.g. computers) and
>> other things is tough. The amount of shear energy you guys have to
>> master like me is astounding and is a blessing/curse of being blind
>> cause we have a built up endurance but short in gas you know? Well, I
>> just worry all of the time about things I can't change. For example, I
>> often times feel like I could have been better off being born in
>> another country like in Europe, Canada, Australia or Britain or some
>> place like that where disabilities could have more of a progressive
>> aim to it. Other times I would like to move there were diversity is a
>> mainstay and the thoughts lurk in my mind like you can't do it or it's
>> visual.
>> Finally, thanks for any ideas on defeating this issue. It's gotten
>> bad so much in the past where I performed self-infliction and
>> attempted suicide. I've been put on medicine but it's pointless too
>> and counsuling is dumb. The anger management therapy and the private
>> counsuling without having a person like one in a million it's
>> worthless to me. It's like being in a cage when other people poke fun
>> at your suffering or something and no similar animals like you around.
>> People the ones that become successful ostercize themselves and have a
>> superiority arrogance complex cause at one time they had somebody help
>> them so why not try to help your fellow man? What happened to Love Thy
>> Neighbor? Seriously cause people think of generalizations of us like
>> lazy, welfare recipent, handicapped, poor, uneducated and etc. We are
>> a nation or people rather that doesn't motivate those that don't llook
>> the build of education but that in itself is misleading of the
>> american population. Anybody can have an education just need time and
>> energy and motivation but I lack in these areas myself right now. I
>> especially like multiple backgrounds from young to the old about this
>> issue and I know that I am not the only one that is out there. I'm not
>> sorry for the length either cause these words have been in me too long
>> and if I held them any longer I will burst. Thank be to God and any
>> prayers you may have about this issue with any advice as well. By the
>> way, sometimes I revert to a class structuralist prospect on
>> economics, background, life experiences, and not necessarily a victim
>> mentality just understanding more than anything is what I need. A
>> person that has walked the streets is prefered.
>>
>>
>> sincerely,
>> Peter
>>
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-- 
Peter
Webmaster
http://www.darkstruggle.com
webmaster at darkstruggle.com
alternative e-mail
sunspot005 at gmail.com

No, I am not but it doesn't seem like Auburn, Alabama has a presence
here anyways. It's too small and if so not enough blind people
probably. Been to the NFB site of Alabama and was moderately
impressed.

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