[Blindtlk] dating seaghted people Vs. Blind people?

[Nikki Wunderlich]

If my friend Hope were on this list I know she'd say she'd rather date some
one who was sighted versus some one who is blind because the sighted person
could drive her places, and could describe things to her that she couldn't
see. She hasn't had very many boy friends either. She is currently dating a
sighted man though. She's 26 years old, and I can think of maybe 4
oyfriends, including this one that she has had. I on the other hand have had
many boy friends, but I don't care if they are sighted or blind, infact, I
was engaged to Kyle Smith for a while who is completely blind, and I've had
other boy friends who were visually impaired or blind. I've only had 2 boy
friends who were sighted. Well in conclusion it doesn't matter to me. The
level of vision some one has is just that, it doesn't make them a good or
bad person. 

Nikki

-----Original Message-----
From: blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
Behalf Of Humberto
Sent: Wednesday, May 25, 2011 8:24 PM
To: nabs-l at nfbnet.org
Cc: blindtlk at nfbnet.org
Subject: [Blindtlk] dating seaghted people Vs. Blind people?

Hello dear listers,

I'm wanting to know, and I've been curious about, your opinions 
on the topic stated in the subject line. I think this discussion 
has been shared already on this list a little bit but it would be 
good for us to discuss this as a matter of opinions are 
concerned.
So, let me begin by asking, what do you think about going out 
with a sighted person Vs. a blind person? Are there any main 
differences, if any, on dating blind people or sighted people? 
Will a blind person expect to date or marry another blind person? 
If I date a sighted person, for instance, will I have to deal 
with the blindness misconceptions that people sometimes have? How 
can a blind person get that sighted person to think that the 
blind person can become a competent member of society by doing 
everything else that a sighted person can do.
I myself have a blind girlfriend, and yes, we enjoy each other as 
much as 2 sighted people will enjoy each other's engagement. I've 
been going with her for about 4 years now, and we still keep in 
touch.
would it be different if I make the choice to go out with a 
sighted girl, yet knowing that my blindness is just a 
characteristic? Will she understand that?
I ask these questions only for your thoughts, and I wouldn't just 
want to start a huge debate here. I must stress, though, that if 
I do choose to date a sighted girlfriend, she must know that my 
blindness will not stop me from doing anything that I want to, 
and having high expectations.
But is there anything that, specifically speaking, a sighted 
person looks for when he or she is trying to date a blind person, 
versus a blind person trying to date a blind person? Is personal 
gloaming a big deal for this? Have you guy gone through 
experiences like that, whether you decide to date someone who is 
sighted or who is blind? I know this might seem quite obvious, 
but I understand that, unfair or fair as it might seem, sighted 
people, the first thing they look at, is how you look. They first 
look at you visually and they know immediately whether to stick 
with one or not.
Any thoughts? Opinions? experiences? questions?

Cheers,  Humberto

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