[Blindtlk] Hiring a Driver

David Andrews dandrews at visi.com
Fri Dec 13 03:58:28 UTC 2013 

Dear Michelle:

I am truly sorry if you did receive bad medical news.  My thoughts, 
and I am sure, those of other list members are with you -- good luck!

As someone else has said, on a list all we can do is offer general 
advice, give someone ideas and support etc.  Each place you live has 
pluses and minuses.

Yes, in an ideal world there should be more services in rural 
areas.  We can certainly advocate for them, but it is not our fault 
that they aren't better.  Unfortunately, there will always be more 
available things in rural areas.  I work for a rehab agency and have 
supervised people providing services.  They could see two to four 
persons in the metro, and only 1 or 2 out in rural areas.  It will 
always cost more and dollars won't go as far.  Unfortunate but real.

Good luck.

Dave

At 09:32 AM 12/11/2013, you wrote:
>And this is why I don't keep up with discussions from here that ask for help.
>Talk to your pastor, I don't have one.
>Talk to your friends, I have only online friends.
>Talk to social services, I'm hooked into foodstamps, soon to be with
>adult Medicaid which will give me a bit more time out, and already
>hooked into medical.
>
>I'm not looking for college, already been there done that.
>
>Or screw the family, I have a 6-month-old niece. I'm not moving to a
>place where I can't see her, currently I live right next door and can
>walk to see her.
>Why the he** is it always about giving up things as opposed to
>expanding services, that should have been expanded years ago when
>Desiree and I were both still in school!!?
>Anybody in a rural area is always in the wrong, voc rehab is THE ONLY
>way to go, and we're supposed to go to services, they aren't supposed
>to expand to reach us.
>Wow, just wow.
>
>Then again, all this talk may be obsoleet for me anyway, since I just
>received some medical news that if true, will most likely kill me, so
>nothing that's been said here really matters in that case. . .
>
>On 12/11/13, justin williams <justin.williams2 at gmail.com> wrote:
> > That's terrible; as soon as someone starts telling me stuff like that, I
> > tune them out.
> >
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: blindtlk [mailto:blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Arielle
> > Silverman
> > Sent: Tuesday, December 10, 2013 10:37 PM
> > To: Blind Talk Mailing List
> > Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Hiring a Driver
> >
> > I'm wondering if what they are opposed to is having a social life at all,
> > or
> > having a social life with other blind people? I'm guessing maybe the
> > friends
> > you want to visit, who live far away, are blind?
> > I mention this because I too have had difficulties in the past with members
> > of my family not accepting my blind-friend network as a real social
> > network.
> > It's much better now, but when I was in college, they would constantly
> > encourage me to "get out there and make friends" and not to hang out with
> > my
> > blind friends too much. I think on some level they thought my friendships
> > with other blind people weren't mature, real friendships.
> > Arielle
> >
> > On 12/10/13, Linda <waterinmyroom at gmail.com> wrote:
> >> I do not understand this.  If adults are not supposed to have a social
> >> life, how would one meet a potential mate?  The only men who asked me
> >> to lunch were the ones I met when I was out of the house living my
> >> life.  Unless a marriage is arranged by the parents, how else would a
> >> person get married and have a family?
> >>
> >>> On Dec 10, 2013, at 8:14 PM, Desiree Oudinot
> >>> <turtlepower17 at gmail.com>
> >>> wrote:
> >>>
> >>> Hi,
> >>> The reason I asked that particular question is because my parents
> >>> seem to think that, once you become an adult, having a social life is
> >>> unnecessary and counterproductive. I don't want to go too far into
> >>> it, because I know that personal anecdotes are usually met with a lot
> >>> of criticism on this listserv, so let's leave it at that.
> >>> Thanks for your response.
> >>>
> >>>> On 12/10/2013 7:47 PM, justin williams wrote:
> >>>> It's actually not juvenile to desire a social life; you deserve a
> >>>> social life too.  That is a very normal thing and everyone performs
> >>>> better in school and in life when they have one.  A church would
> >>>> expect a certain level of involvement; probably attendance in Sunday
> > service.
> >>>>
> >>>> -----Original Message-----
> >>>> From: blindtlk [mailto:blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of
> >>>> Desiree Oudinot
> >>>> Sent: Tuesday, December 10, 2013 6:39 PM
> >>>> To: Blind Talk Mailing List
> >>>> Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Hiring a Driver
> >>>>
> >>>> Hi,
> >>>> I, too, live in a rural area of PA, so your message really resonated
> >>>> with me. I have some questions and concerns that perhaps you can
> >>>> shed some light on.
> >>>> I also don't get out of my house very often. There is no Paratransit
> >>>> service. My family is either working or, let's just say, not being
> >>>> supportive of me. If I wanted to go somewhere, I would have to call
> >>>> a cab, and we all know how expensive that can be, particularly when
> >>>> we're not just talking about riding down a few city blocks, but for
> >>>> several miles to get to the grocery store or what have you.
> >>>> As for hiring a driver, I'll admit that I've never actually tried
> >>>> it, but because of the fact that things aren't exactly close at
> >>>> hand, I would think I would have to pay an arm and a leg to get any
> >>>> kind of services.
> >>>> I disagree that taking a class at a community college is as easy as
> >>>> you're making it sound. When I was considering taking that route, my
> >>>> VR counselor told me flat out that transportation could not be
> >>>> provided to and from the college because it was too far away. they
> >>>> also wouldn't pay for the classes because you have to take at least
> >>>> 12 credits in order for the state to fund it. Community college
> >>>> courses may not be terribly expensive, but for folks like Michelle
> >>>> and myself who live on SSI, providing our own transportation, plus
> >>>> paying for the class would simply not be feasible.
> >>>> I also have to ask this, and I'm not trying to start an argument, so
> >>>> please take it as a general query only. If I started calling around
> >>>> to local churches, wouldn't I have to be a member of their
> >>>> congregation before they would even think about providing rides? I
> >>>> consider myself to be a non-denominational Christian. I believe, but
> >>>> I do not want to be a part of an organized religion. I feel that I
> >>>> am entitled to this opinion, and that just because I'm blind, I
> >>>> shouldn't have to join an organization that I'll most likely be
> >>>> uncomfortable with just to be able to go places. I feel that's
> >>>> unfair both to myself and to the people who might provide
> >>>> transportation. They would expect a certain level of faith and
> >>>> involvement from me that I can't give, and I would expect them not
> >>>> to badger me about it. Either way you slice it, it doesn't seem
> >>>> right.
> >>>> It seems like it would cause a lot of strife and ill will.
> >>>> I could be wrong about this, but I wish there were other places one
> >>>> could reach out to that didn't have that kind of burden attached to
> >>>> it.
> >>>> Furthermore, how would payment be handled if you needed to travel a
> >>>> long distance? For example, many of my friends live at least an hour
> >>>> away. I haven't seen them in years. I wouldn't really expect someone
> >>>> to drive that far just to fulfill such a personal need. If I did, I
> >>>> would probably feel obligated to pay them as much money as a cab
> >>>> company would charge to go such a long distance. It's one thing if I
> >>>> need to go to the doctor or the store; things that adults do, in
> >>>> other words. But I would feel highly uncomfortable with expecting
> >>>> someone to chauffeur me for long distances just because I would like
> >>>> a social life. Is that really as juvenile as I think it is?
> >>>> Again, I'm asking this in all seriousness, because I don't know.
> >>>>
> >>>>
> >>>>> On 12/9/2013 3:19 PM, Ericka Short wrote:
> >>>>> I usually refrain from taking sides but as a trained social worker
> >>>>> I have to agree with Dave.  The rest of the world doesn't know you
> >>>>> exist and they won't come to you so you have to make an effort.  I
> >>>>> was raised in a town of just over 10,000 which was the county seat.
> >>>>> There was no transit available at all.  You either waked, rode with
> >>>>> family or a friend, neighbor etc. Call any faith-based
> >>>>> organization, share your situation and they will help you.  Perhaps
> >>>>> the county social services needs to hear your story so they can
> >>>>> help.  I hope the fact you could be the instigator of change in you
> >>>>> community for the better motivates you to look into things more.
> >>>>> This is coming from someone so shy nobody  heard me speak in public
> > until I was in 7th grade.
> >>>>> College was very liberating and I dropped the shy person I was for
> >>>>> the most part and found my voice.
> >>>>>
> >>>>> If it is a college class you want to take, contact the disability
> >>>>> services program for ideas before signing up.  This is part of
> >>>>> their job.  They are there to help with more than just get your
> >>>>> books in a special format or help you find your way around. Contact
> >>>>> the state services for the blind or office of the  blind. In WI the
> >>>>> office for the blind works strictly with adults who are either not
> >>>>> working or are in retirement and need help doing daily living
> >>>>> tasks.  No matter what state, you are not alone Michelle. There are
> >>>>> a lots of people in WI stuck in rural areas with nothing but 300
> >>>>> residents, a bar, a church and perhaps a convenience store.
> >>>>> Neighbors are miles away, not just down the street.  Just keep
> >>>>> looking.
> >>>>>
> >>>>> Ericka J. Short
> >>>>> 262-697-0510
> >>>>>
> >>>>> "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me".
> >>>>> Philippians
> >>>>> 4:13
> >>>>>
> >>>>> "No hand is too small or too big to do good in this world." EJ.
> >>>>> Short
> >>>>>
> >>>>> _______________________________________________
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> >>>>> blindtlk:
> >>>>> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blindtlk_nfbnet.org/turtlepower17
> >>>>> %40
> >>>>> gmail.com
> >>>>>
> >>>>> .
> >>>> --
> >>>> Desiree
> >>>>
> >>>>
> >>>> _______________________________________________
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> >>>> for
> >>>> blindtlk:
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> >>>> s2%40gma
> >>>> il.com
> >>>>
> >>>>
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> >>>> 40gmail.com
> >>>
> >>> --
> >>> Desiree
> >>>
> >>>
> >>> _______________________________________________
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> >>
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> >>
> >
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