[Blindtlk] Unsolicited prayers

Carly Mihalakis carlymih at comcast.net
Wed Jul 2 17:16:02 UTC 2014 

Good morning, Liz,

         Having never worked with a guide dog I am probably the last 
person in this here world, who ough to be speaking on this. I will 
say thatClearly, people don't realize the ripple caused by addressing 
your dog by his name.
And Liz, I don't think of you as one of those hard-nosed blinks 
forever pushing a personal  agenda of proving.  there is something to 
prove! In fact, aren't we on another List together?
for today, Car05:35 AM 7/2/2014, Elizabeth Campbell wrote:
>Hello Carlie and others.
>I don't believe in being rude to people at all,and before I started working
>with dogs, I don't think I would have understood the complex nature of the
>team relationship which takes a great deal of effort on the part of both the
>handler and the dog.
>All I am saying is that people need to respect us for who we are and not
>channel all of their interests toward the dog. I have seen the problems that
>arise when my dog is distracted, such as trying to follow the person who
>talked to him at the street corner or not immediately obeying a command
>because he is focused on the other person.
>So, we are really talking about the issues of respecting one another and
>safety while out traveling.
>
>Hope this helps.
>
>Liz
>-----Original Message-----
>From: blindtlk [mailto:blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Carly
>Mihalakis via blindtlk
>Sent: Tuesday, July 1, 2014 7:38 PM
>To: Peter Donahue; Blind Talk Mailing List
>Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Unsolicited prayers
>
>Good afternoon, all,
>          Okay. I ought not have even opened my FAT mouth, having never
>worked with a guide dog, I was definitely speaking out of turn, without even
>considdering the intricate relationship between the dog and his user. So
>sorry, some of us are experiencing a little foot in mouth!
>I stand soundly corrected. Thank you.At 09:10 AM 7/1/2014, you wrote:
> >Good morning Christine and everyone,
> >
> >    You need to be careful with that one. If you tell everyone your
> > guide dog's name you can draw unwanted attention to yourself and cause
> > your dog to become solicitous; craving attention from other people.
> > This can lead to serious dog distraction problems and can undermine
> > the relationship between yourself and your dog.
> >
> >    Something I and I'm sure others on this list have had happen is
> > when you tell someone your dog's name they behave as if you gave them
> > a license to command them and start talking to them actions that can
> > cause your dog to be distracted from its work. Please be careful with
> > this one. Telling someone your dog's name may put them at ease around
> > you but it can also open a nasty can of worms.
> > Finally when you meet someone do you want to be their center of
> > attention or should the dog be the center of attention? My dog isn't
> > responsible for conducting business transactions, determining when it
> > is safe to cross the street or not, or making friendly conversation. I
> > only tell someone my dog's name if they're someone I know to prevent
> > the kind of issues discussed above. It's okay for folks to be friends
> > with your dog but too much attention given to the dog can lead to
> > serious problems in your team work with the dog and create unwanted
> > attention from the public and promote the false misconceptions related
> > to guide dogs and their use by the blind.
> >
> >Peter Donahue
> >
> >
> >
> >----- Original Message ----- From: "Christine Olivares via blindtlk"
> ><blindtlk at nfbnet.org>
> >To: "Carly Mihalakis" <carlymih at comcast.net>; "Blind Talk Mailing List"
> ><blindtlk at nfbnet.org>
> >Sent: Tuesday, July 01, 2014 10:28 AM
> >Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Unsolicited prayers
> >
> >
> >Amen Carly! My husband and I applied for guide dogs, and though we have
> >not heard whether we got accepted, if we did, I know I would want
> >everyone and their brother to stop me and ask for my guide dog's name.
> >People are very comfortable with animals, sometimes more than humans,
> >and by giving our dog's name, we can help these people feel comfortable
> >around us and humanity as a whole.
> >
> >Animals are very therapeutic, and by sharing them, we can bring lots of
> >healing to this world. I would proudly show off my dog because the dog
> >is a part of me. It's like sharing your spouse.
> >
> >thanks,
> >Christine
> >On Jul 1, 2014, at 12:55 AM, Carly Mihalakis via blindtlk
> ><blindtlk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> >
> >>Good afternoon, Liz,
> >>
> >>A Sociologist thinker who studied people he refers too as normals
> >>(meaning people un effected),  and in turn blind people Have you ever
> >>begged a question of why normals are curious about knowing your dog? I
> >>believe people experience blindness in terms of a second hand, on a
> >>person2person basis. If you, as I do, recruit ol'Sighty to guide you,
> >>even when you might not particularly need help, you can sort of,
> >>through humor and straight talk show them how approachable, even
> >>humorous we can be?
> >>If I had a dog, you better believe I would want people to know about
> >>us, how we work together, how are sharing is symbiotic in nature. So,
> >>if you are proud of your 4-legged leader, perhaps you can be proud to
> >>share him with whomever should want to know him?
> >>So, Liz, Why are normals, generally afraid or at least ill at ease around
>us?
> >>I imagine it is primarily because people have rebuffed their  gestures
> >>of support at least, and at worst have down-right rude or
> >>emasculating.  The average  sighted person's being so intrigued since,
> >>as Peter said, almost as a rule normals never, ever come into personal
> >>contact with a blink so, obviously it is their instinct to act like
> >>any blind people with whom they make personal contact are you know,
> >>zoo animals. For a change, try stepping outside of yourself,
> >>understanding that presences are scariest while submerged by darkness
> >>and, don't be rude since the last thing you want is for all blinks to
> >>be ascribed with having chips on their shoulders? Perhaps, be mindful
> >>of working toward the end of bringing levity and light when
> >>uncomfortable, not hostility?
> >>Car 07:03 AM 6/29/2014, Elizabeth Campbell via blindtlk wrote:
> >>>Hello all,
> >>>Besides the unwanted prayers, those of us with guide dogs face an
> >>>incredible amount of what I call public interference.
> >>>I don't know how others feel, but it bothers me that people come up
> >>>to me at Starbucks or while I'm waiting for the bus and always ask for my
>dog's name.
> >>>I sometimes say that I don't give that information out when my dog is
> >>>working, or I sometimes ask the person for their name. The response
> >>>is always that they just want to know the dog's name. I find that to
> >>>be very offensive because again, we are not seen as people.
> >>>
> >>>Just my thoughts.
> >>>
> >>>Liz
> >>>
> >>>-----Original Message-----
> >>>From: blindtlk [mailto:blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Mark
> >>>Tardif via blindtlk
> >>>Sent: Sunday, June 29, 2014 6:26 AM
> >>>To: Marion Gwizdala; Blind Talk Mailing List
> >>>Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Unsolicited prayers
> >>>
> >>>Amen, Marion, I couldn't agree with your more.  And really, what
> >>>gives someone the right to violate your personal space in that way?
> >>>And you are right, this suggests that this person in their ignorance
> >>>doesn't view you as
> >>>
> >>>a whole person.  That says more about them than it does about you.
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>Mark Tardif
> >>>Nuclear arms will not hold you.
> >>>-----Original Message-----
> >>>From: Marion Gwizdala via blindtlk
> >>>Sent: Sunday, June 29, 2014 7:17 AM
> >>>To: 'Carly Mihalakis' ; 'Blind Talk Mailing List'
> >>>Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Unsolicited prayers
> >>>
> >>>Car,
> >>>I will respectfully disagree! First of all, no one has the right to
> >>>touch me without my permission. Secondly, those who feel a need to
> >>>pray for me to be healed of my blindness is tantamount to someone
> >>>wishing to pray for someone to heal them of their dark skin color.
> >>>The underlying judgement they are making is that I am not a whole
> >>>person because of my blindness, an assumption I reject. In fact, I
> >>>tell those wishing to pray for my healing that I have already been
> >>>healed of the myths and misconceptions that blindness is a malady to
> >>>be healed; therefore, I tell them, I will pray for them to be healed
> >>>of their ignorance and misconceptions. I also share with them that my
> >>>blindness is actually a source of healing for others, helping those
> >>>who are blind heal themselves of the same limitations I once placed upon
>myself.
> >>>
> >>>Blessings!
> >>>Marion Gwizdala
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>-----Original Message-----
> >>>From: blindtlk [mailto:blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of
> >>>Carly Mihalakis via blindtlk
> >>>Sent: Saturday, June 28, 2014 9:06 PM
> >>>To: Blind Talk Mailing List; blindtlk at nfbnet.org
> >>>Subject: Re: [Blindtlk] Unsolicited prayers
> >>>
> >>>Hi, Eric,
> >>>
> >>>Just know that, people's placing their hands on your eyes and praying
> >>>is not so much about you, or your blindness,but about their
> >>>spirituality. You said yourself, you resented when others tried
> >>>challenging your faith. Perhaps, you extend the same acceptance as is
>your expectation of others?
> >>>Car
> >>> >Arielle, I have your mindset, as well.  As I get older, my
> >>> >tolerance level shrinks.  I'm 5-9, and people have even bad-mouthed
> >>> >me for not accepting my lack by not taking their help, wanting to
>become violent.
> >>> >And one person even criticized me for my faith in God, when I,
> >>>specifically, was praying
> >>> >for a new cane after it was broken.  Two things are   out-of-bounds,
> >>> >praying for my blindness because they feel sorry for me, and laying
> >>> >their hands on my eyes.
> >>> >
> >>> >Eric
> >>> >..
> >>> >
> >>> >..
> >>> >
> >>> >Eric from Los Angeles.  Live life!  Love community!  Eric on Facebook:
> >>> >eric at pmpmail.com.
> >>> >
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