[Blindtlk] Just Venting!

[Danielle Antoine]

I just cannot stand it when somebody say you can do something then let
somebody else do it or just prevent you from doing so. Most often,
it's always what I'm doing. Like for instance, my brother and sister
didn't have jobs wasn't looking for jobs until I started. Well bless
God Hallallujah, thank you Jesus, they both got jobs while I'm still
sitting at home. In fact, it cost me more because they have
transporation and drive whereas, I don't have those luxuries and where
Im located it's really not feasible for me to work even if I was in
optimal health. Anyway, my sister followed through with the apps I got
for her and my brother didn't and my mom allowed it; they both got
hired through someone else's efforts in the end. I hoe they keep their
jobs this time! They both are lucky and have no problems getting hired
with minimal effort! I have a lot of time on my hands so can devote to
a few mmindless things that don't require me to think so hard or use
much energy. So, why all this unnecessary stress and aggravation. For
my blind parents, how do you go about picking baby gear on your own? I
lost my babies oh about a couple of months ago and my other prior
three children live with their father. but I had gotten the okay from
a couple of friends prior to all this to document pattern descriptions
and everytime I start I can never get very far do to computer
breakage, stealing of software, hacking and such through no fault of
my own. As we all know, our technology is expensive and can not easily
be replaced in a day or so. Even whene we fix one thing such as the
laptop or desktop, we still need to install a screen reader, and now
MS Office since it is now not standard and if you have scanning
software so it is not off the shelf ready to rock and roll. I am on
SSI only. Believe me, this has to be somebody sighted who wouldn't
want this job if they had it but I am happy to do it. I really started
doing this out of sheer frustration. Since my niece came along, the
adults in her life started buying everything with like characters and
such when it would've made mor sense for them to buy colored stuff.
Like for real people! They can see things like, tangerine, gold,
Everest, purple, onyx, Paisley, Fuschia, Bromley, Go Green, Cameron,
Saturn, Cowmooflage  and such like that. I mean, really what does that
mean to a total who has never seen colors or seen them clear enough in
their life? Those are just examples of pattern names And colors which
they can esily coordinate accordingly rather than snatching up any and
everything. My sister knew she was having  a girl and instead she got
neutral stuff as well. what ever happened to commonsense, courtesy,
consideration, feelings, and boundaries? My mom denied my pregnancy
though so I hope she is happy with my loss on top of me being unable
to honor the visitation agreement with my children since she and my ex
have serious beef! I should also mention ther have been about 10
babies in total born since she has and that is what so angers me even
more. Also, most of her things relate back to my own teenage and
preteen's likes. In fact, my mom bought the exact same car seat I had
bought for my first son with a zoo theme! I should say that my sister
was in jail but she knew what she was having before she went in and
did not prepare. So about a month before my niece's arrival I started
looking at gear and stuff for her. I had planned to buy everything she
needed since I had saved a little money up, to take the worry from her
and my mom who I was sure going fo likely get her and at the time was
talking about moving to where we are now with more space for my
sisters kids. Of course, I was looking at sex appropriate things for
her from the diaper bag to the crib to a few toys and washcloths. I
figure when its coming out of someone else's pocket it shouldn't
matter thow much it cost since you didn't have nothing anyway. At that
time, I wasn't expecting.