[BlindTlk] frustrating home situation

[Judy Jones]

The last comment about hygene  or anything else.  If you want to be treated
like an adult, you should exhibit adult behavior i.e. taking care of your
person and anything else adults do.  With rights come responsibilities.

Judy

-----Original Message-----
From: BlindTlk <blindtlk-bounces at nfbnet.org> On Behalf Of Madison Martin via
BlindTlk
Sent: Monday, November 16, 2020 3:01 PM
To: blindtlk at nfbnet.org
Cc: maddymartin at mymts.net
Subject: [BlindTlk] frustrating home situation

Hi all,
Hope this is okay to talk about hear, I just really need to vent. 
I forgot to say that Dad and I went out for super on Saturday to get away
from the craziness. Plus I don't eat pizza. Makayla's biggest issue is that
her and Mom are too much a like, so they're always at each other and she
thinks that Mom is always mad at her when she isn't. Dad takes
anti-depressant meds, but I think he watches and reads way too much news. I
also think he drinks way too much coffie and alcohol, and he also needs to
lose weight. Makayla also likes to nag me about stuff that Mom and Dad don't
bug me about, I already have two parents I don't want or need a third. I'm
an adult so I think I should be allowed to make my own decisions and not get
told what to do. Mom also loves to be in control all the time which is very
annoying. None of us are very good at talking about and sharing our
feelings, if we were a normal family then we could talk about this stuff,
but we aren't. I know that a therapist can't necessarily solve our problems,
but hopefully they could give us ways to cope. Mom is the one that needs the
most help, but we know that she wouldn't go or talk.  
I don't know that Mom would ever join us, and I don't know if Makayla even
wants to go. I'd consider it, but only if we found the right therapist.
There are many I'm sure, but they're not all the same. I'd love to move out,
but I don't think I want to live by myself. I used to think that Dad and I
should go live together, but now I'm not so sure. I already told you about
his issues, and he also nags me about stuff mainly personal hygiene stuff,
mainly showiering. I don't go anywhere so I really don't care how I look or
if I smell. Plus the less we shower the less water we use, and the less
product we have to buy. As an adult, should I not be allowed to make my own
decsions even when it comes to personal hygiene? Sometimes I feel like I'm
treated more like a kid then the adult that I am and should be allowed to
be. Makayla would probably just yell at me, she wouldn't actually teach me
how to do something. She quite often just says "If you want something then
why not just learn to do it yourself." She also bugs me about stuff and
tells me what to do too. She's also gotten really bad at just taking things
without asking, mainly food. Sometimes someone buys something for themselves
or for someone else (that's not her), but she just sees things and assumes
she can eat or use them, when she can't always. If she'd just ask then
chances are she could eat some of or use some of whatever it is, but she
doesn't. Dad does this too, not as much though. We made fudge a few months
ago, and she ate a few pieces without asking. It had to be kept in the
fridge so Mom would cut up a few pieces and put them out to warm up a bit.
Now if we make it again she's not allowed to have any because she didn't ask
the first time, she blew it. What's fair is fair. Plus the last few times
she's made stuff she hasn't asked me if I'd like any, not that I would
unless it's plain. It's just annoying when Mom or Dad buys me something and
then I don't really get any because she's eaten it. Dad says I'm going to
have to start hiding stuff in my room, which would be weird, if it gets to
that then I think we have a real problem on our hands. Plus she's good at
noticing/finding things that Mom has tried to hide, in particular chocolate.
Mom isn't always good at sharing either, but I just ask and if she says no
then I don't touch it. We might have to start putting our names on things,
which Makayla did yesterday, when she got this macaronie dinner from Sobeys,
which I didn't get. If she wants her own then that's fine, but I like them
too, so I should've gotten one too. I've learned that if someone gets
something for me, whether it's a dinner or snack stuff I have to eat it
right away or else there might not be any/one left when I really want
it/some.  She yells at me when we're doing dishes because apparently I don't
dry them right. Now I just wait for her to finish washing and then I dry.
I've tried talking to Mom, but that didn't really work/help. She thought
that I was talking about some particular time or decision that I want to
make, but I was just talking about in general. I still collect animal
figurenes, and she has this weird thing that if it's too close to my
birthday or Christmas then I can't buy anything, even though when I'm
looking at stuff it usually over a month until either event. I do it because
I worry that she won't like the look of the figurine that I'm asking for so
she won't buy it for me, regardless of how much I want it. Like last
Christmas I asked for this particular husky, well she didn't buy it for me
because she said that she didn't like it's face, it was too pointy, but the
2 that she got me looked way more like wolves then huskies. It's my money,
should I not be allowed to spend it when and how I want?
Any thoughts/suggestions? Like I said, I just really needed to vent, so if
no one answers then that's fine. Thanks for letting me do it anyway.
Madison   


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