[blparent] Changing a Troubling Habit

[Dena Wainwright]

Hi.

I agree with what has been said. I think consistency is key. I think she 
must learn to come when called, both as a matter of respect for your 
authority, and for her own safety.

Also, I talked this over with my husband, and we both agree that statements 
that refer to your blindness as something that in any way makes you less 
capable are just rude. Do you want your daughter to learn that mommy isn't 
as effective because she can't see? Frankly, I'd be pretty pissed at my 
husband if he said something like that to my daughter, even in gest.

Dena




----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Jo Elizabeth Pinto" <jopinto at pcdesk.net>
To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Thursday, November 19, 2009 2:56 PM
Subject: [blparent] Changing a Troubling Habit


> I've been coming up against a situation that is troubling me a little, and 
> I'm looking for some feedback.  I guess I need to know whether I'm 
> overreacting, and there's nothing to be worried about, or if there is 
> something to be concerned about and what I ought to do.
>
> Sarah is almost 21 months old now, and I stay at home with her.  She holds 
> my hand when we leave the house, and I've also got one of those animal 
> backpack harnesses for her.  But around the house, she's taken to running 
> away from me when it's time for me to change her diaper or put her to bed 
> and she isn't interested in doing those things.  I know that's normal 
> toddler behavior, so I don't take it personally.  But I also know there's 
> no way I can chase her and catch up with her, so I don't want to set that 
> up as a pattern.  I just stay in one place and call her, keeping the mood 
> light, and she usually comes to me soon enough.  No big deal.
>
> The problem is, her dad and some sighted friends have chased her and 
> scooped her up, and a couple of times I've heard them say stuff like, 
> "Well, I can see, so I don't have to wait for you to come to me," or "It's 
> hard to get away from someone who can see you, isn't it?"
>
> My worry is, will this start establishing the idea in Sarah's mind that 
> Mom can't see, so she can't keep up, or she can't do what needs doing?  I 
> don't think anybody has meant to be harmful or thoughtless, but wouldn't 
> it be better to have everybody following the no chasing rule?  If so, is 
> there a practical, realistic way to break the chasing habit in other 
> caregivers, or at least stop the comments?
>
> Thanks for thinking about this with me.
>
>
> Jo Elizabeth
>
> Until lions have their historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify 
> the hunters.--African Proverb
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