[blparent] Changing a Troubling Habit

[E. Tarr]

    I don't think that you are over reacting at all when it comes to asking 
that your husband and other sighted people  who may watch your daughter to 
be consistent with the no chasing rule.  I myself would also not appreciate 
such comments made by sighted people.  My husband and I have encountered a 
similar challenge because we did not consistently enforce rules with our 
son.  For example, when I take our son out alone, I always require him to 
hold my hand at all times.  However, when he has gone out with my husband 
who is sighted and me together, he has been less compliant because he was 
used to having more freedom as my husband can see him from a distance. 
Fortunately, we are making progress concerning this because of his age and 
because we have tried to commit to enforcing these techniques that work well 
for blind parents.  It has been more difficult because we started 
implementing them later than the age that is most effective and because of 
our differing styles of supervision.
    If all caregivers practice the same techniques with sarah at this young 
age, I believe that it will benefit everyone, and it will be  easier for her 
to obey you and respect what you say and do.  I hope that this made sense. 
sometimes the thoughts in my head don't translate well into writing.
Ellen Elizabeth

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Jo Elizabeth Pinto" <jopinto at pcdesk.net>
To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Thursday, November 19, 2009 3:56 PM
Subject: [blparent] Changing a Troubling Habit


> I've been coming up against a situation that is troubling me a little, and 
> I'm looking for some feedback.  I guess I need to know whether I'm 
> overreacting, and there's nothing to be worried about, or if there is 
> something to be concerned about and what I ought to do.
>
> Sarah is almost 21 months old now, and I stay at home with her.  She holds 
> my hand when we leave the house, and I've also got one of those animal 
> backpack harnesses for her.  But around the house, she's taken to running 
> away from me when it's time for me to change her diaper or put her to bed 
> and she isn't interested in doing those things.  I know that's normal 
> toddler behavior, so I don't take it personally.  But I also know there's 
> no way I can chase her and catch up with her, so I don't want to set that 
> up as a pattern.  I just stay in one place and call her, keeping the mood 
> light, and she usually comes to me soon enough.  No big deal.
>
> The problem is, her dad and some sighted friends have chased her and 
> scooped her up, and a couple of times I've heard them say stuff like, 
> "Well, I can see, so I don't have to wait for you to come to me," or "It's 
> hard to get away from someone who can see you, isn't it?"
>
> My worry is, will this start establishing the idea in Sarah's mind that 
> Mom can't see, so she can't keep up, or she can't do what needs doing?  I 
> don't think anybody has meant to be harmful or thoughtless, but wouldn't 
> it be better to have everybody following the no chasing rule?  If so, is 
> there a practical, realistic way to break the chasing habit in other 
> caregivers, or at least stop the comments?
>
> Thanks for thinking about this with me.
>
>
> Jo Elizabeth
>
> Until lions have their historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify 
> the hunters.--African Proverb
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