[blparent] Looking for Literature or other suggestionsfor educating my new DR. On parenting as a Blind person

Wed Mar 31 02:26:39 UTC 2010

Thanks so very much!  I'll call you!

Debbie

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Leslie Hamric" <lhamric930 at comcast.net>
To: "'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Tuesday, March 30, 2010 9:01 PM
Subject: Re: [blparent] Looking for Literature or other suggestionsfor 
educating my new DR. On parenting as a Blind person

> Hi Debbie.  Please write me off list about the book.  I'd like to 
> contribute
> something.
> Leslie
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
> Behalf Of Deborah Kent Stein
> Sent: Tuesday, March 30, 2010 1:05 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: Re: [blparent] Looking for Literature or other suggestions for
> educating my new DR. On parenting as a Blind person
>
>
>
> Dear Miranda and Listers,
>
> This situation is a living example of why we need the booklet that Barbara
> Pierce and I are working on - and why we need your help!  The booklet
> explains, with many lively quotes from blind parents, how we handle the
> challenges of raising our children.  We NEED photographs that will
> illustrate the points we are making in the text.  If you can help, PLEASE
> contact me off list as soon as possible!  This project is important for 
> all
> of us and for a generation of blind parents yet to come.
>
> Debbie
> dkent5817 at att.net
> 773-631-1093
>
> ----- Original Message ----- 
> From: "Miranda Borka" <knownoflove at gmail.com>
> To: <blparent at NFBnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, March 30, 2010 12:36 PM
> Subject: [blparent] Looking for Literature or other suggestions for
> educating my new DR. On parenting as a Blind person
>
>
>> Hi,
>> I recently found out that my insurance covers a private doctor in my 
>> city,
>
>> and I had my first appointment with him yesterday. Part of this
>> appointment involved my physical for our fostercare-adoption process.
>> After seeing the form, the doctor said, "I'm not wanting to sound rude,
>> but how do you plan to parent a child? Will the children be Blind since
>> you are?" I told him that the children would not be Blind, and that it is
>> difficult to find a child in the U.S fostercare system who is Blind
>> without that child having other multiple special needs. He then asked, 
>> "Is
>
>> your husband sighted?" I again answered "No." He asked, "I'm sure you can
>> hear a pin drop, but how would that make you able to parent?" I reassured
>> him that I knew of many successful parents who just happened to be Blind,
>> and that it was not impossible. I further explained that although as a
>> parent who happens to be Blind I may need to make some adaptions, it was
>> not impossible.
>> Although very shocked and amazed, he seemed satisfied with my response,
>> and clearly admitted to never knowing a Blind person who could or wanted
>> to be a parent. In the end, he put on my foster-adopt physical form, "She
>> is Blind, but very capable and ambitious." Although I do wish he wouldn't
>> have made my Blindness a point on the form (as it had already been 
>> noted",
>
>> I figured it best to leave well enough alone.
>>
>> I have had friends suggest I leave this doctor and go to a more 
>> respectful
>
>> doctor. However, I disagree. First, I am aware that it is a fact that 
>> most
>
>> of the sighted general public are uneducated about Blindness and aspects
>> of living as a person who is Blind like parenting. I can't run away from
>> these situations, as it would not only deepen the stereotype that Blind
>> people are not independent, but it would not set a good example of how to
>> handle adverse situations to anyone watching (including our children when
>> they enter our home).
>> Furthermore, as my doctor said,  he was uneducated about Blindness and 
>> the
>
>> ability for a person who is Blind to parent. I don't believe that walking
>> away from this doctor would aid in educating him, and I honestly felt
>> sorry for him and his lack of education. I'll admit to feeling initially
>> defensive at his insessent questioning of my capability to parent, but I
>> suddenly wanted to educate him.
>>
>> Whether my doctor realizes it or not, he has challenged me to go in to my
>> next appointment (or contact his office) very equipped with information,
>> materials and/or knowledge to educate and empower him to understand and
>> work with myself and any other Blind person he comes in contact with who
>> is or wishes to be a parent.
>>
>> I write all of this to ask for your feedback. Can anyone of you share how
>> you've dealt with situations like this? Can you share any literature,
>> materials or anything I can provide my doctor so he can see for himself
>> that what I am saying is indeed true? I want him to be able to be
>> informed, and not to just take my word for it.
>> Any feedback and ideas would be greatly appreciated.
>> Thanks in advance, and have a great week!
>>
>> In Christ, Miranda
>>
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>
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