[blparent] need urgent help

Elizabeth Cooks elizabethcooks at comcast.net
Wed May 26 07:19:12 UTC 2010


sommebody was wondering how I was sure this case was on the up and up.  It's 
becausemy husband nearly had the same thing happen to us when Angelica was 
born.  I later found out that it was the OBGYN, who, by the way, had the 
bedside manner of a moose, that reported us.  Luckily, the CPS worker who 
came to see me and i knew each other and he knew what questions to ask, and 
he essentially told the social worker and the hospital staff to go away and 
leave me alone.  I told the hospital social worker that said person could 
ask any questions they ahd.  Instead, on the day i go home, said person 
prodeeds to tell me how to place my newborn baby when she is lying down, as 
I had never been a parent before when he knew I had.  What was the report? 
He didn't know if I could clean the baby proppery when she was messy, and 
how would I know how to support her head when holding her?  What an idiot! 
Very semilar things.  I am sure that if I had gotten an uneducated 
overzealous worker instead of someone i knew, something semilar would have 
happened.  Just as an aside, I knew this person from church and not from any 
previous encounter with CPS.
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "sharon howerton" <shrnhow at att.net>
To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Tuesday, May 25, 2010 6:24 PM
Subject: Re: [blparent] need urgent help


>I teach our Parenting series at Hadley. There are three 
>courses--Preparation, Infancy and Early Years. I have had students who took 
>one or all of the courses just to be knowledgeable and to show any agency, 
>if one did get involved, that they were making an effort to educate 
>themselves. Our school is here for those who want or need it, and the 
>courses are free, but one is required to prepare and submit assignments. I 
>would welcome any questions on or off list. I've taught these courses for 
>perhaps 5 years now. I am a blind parent with two adult sighted sons.
> Sharon Howerton
> shrnhow at att.net
> ----- Original Message ----- 
> From: "Steve Jacobson" <steve.jacobson at visi.com>
> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, May 25, 2010 1:35 PM
> Subject: Re: [blparent] need urgent help
>
>
>> What probably happened is that a hospital social worker called Child 
>> Protection.  While this doesn't happen all the time, it happens more than 
>> it should.  For starters,
>> the couple needs to present a reasonable case to whatever social worker 
>> they meet with.  While they certainly have rights, it is difficult to 
>> have to fight this out in the
>> courts at this point so it is better to do what can be done to avoid 
>> that. It wouldn't hurt for everyone in question to know that the new 
>> parents feel strongly enough to
>> challeng in court if necessary, though.  They need to be ready to answer 
>> questions about how they would handle the various functions of parenting, 
>> and if this is
>> their first, it would be good for them to work with another blind parent. 
>> In fact, asking that another blind parent be with them when they talk to 
>> the social worker
>> would be good.  The social worker may not even be aware that there are 
>> blind parents who raise sighted kids.
>>
>> On the other hand, if the parents are having their first child and have 
>> not given much thought to various aspects of parenting, they need to get 
>> answers and figure
>> things out in a hurry.  Whether it is right or wrong, new parents who 
>> appear not to know what they are getting into will have more problems 
>> than those who can say
>> they know how to change a diaper, feed a child, detect diaper rash, check 
>> the baby's temperature and so on.  The social worker is going to close 
>> his or her eyes
>> and think about what he or she could do as a parent and we know this is a 
>> poor way to draw conclusions, but it isw how some form their opinions.
>>
>> This kind of thing can be very serious, so do what you can to help them 
>> out or get them in contact with others who can help.
>>
>> Best regards,
>>
>> Steve Jacobson
>>
>> On Tue, 25 May 2010 11:31:01 -0500, Robert Shelton wrote:
>>
>>>Is it remotely possible that the other members of the family have an 
>>>agenda?
>>
>>
>>>"A strong nation, like a strong person, can afford to be gentle, firm,
>>>thoughtful, and restrained. It can afford to extend a helping hand to
>>>others. It is a weak nation, like a weak person, that must behave with
>>>bluster and boasting and rashness and other signs of insecurity."
>>>--Jimmy Carter
>>
>>>-----Original Message-----
>>>From: Tammy, Paul and Colyn [mailto:tcl189 at rogers.com]
>>>Sent: Monday, May 24, 2010 7:14 PM
>>>To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
>>>Subject: Re: [blparent] need urgent help
>>
>>>Hi,
>>
>>>And, cps should not be talking to these parent's family about anything, 
>>>it's
>>
>>>a breach of confidence especially when apparently the family is being 
>>>told
>>>different things by cps.
>>
>>>Tammy
>>>----- Original Message ----- 
>>>From: "Barbara Hammel" <poetlori8 at msn.com>
>>>To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>>>Sent: Monday, May 24, 2010 3:51 PM
>>>Subject: Re: [blparent] need urgent help
>>
>>
>>>>I may be wrong but I don't think CPS normally works to take children 
>>>>away
>>>>if there is no history.  In other words, they usually are reactive not
>>>>proactive.  If they're being pro-active, it probably is--as someone
>>>>said--an overzealous worker.  If the family and the blind child do not 
>>>>get
>>>>along, the family may be part of this problem, too.
>>>> But whatever the circumstances, the parents have not proved themselves
>>>> unfit parents so CPS has no right to remove the baby.
>>>> Many sighted parents have been lousy parents and kept their kids, these
>>>> people are just acting on their fears.  If they can't talk rationally 
>>>> with
>>
>>>> the social worker, maybe another blind person who knows them could be 
>>>> at
>>>> an arranged meeting.  The contacts that have been given in other 
>>>> messages
>>>> should definitely be used.  Fear motivates people to do irrational 
>>>> things.
>>>> Barbara
>>>>
>>>> ...
>>>> Yesterday is
>>>> A path well-trod,
>>>> A familiar lane
>>>> Through sacred sod,
>>>> A road we travel
>>>> Too often, I fear,
>>>> For there are the good times
>>>> When things are hard here,
>>>> ...
>>>>
>>>> --------------------------------------------------
>>>> From: "Pipi" <blahblahblah0822 at gmail.com>
>>>> Sent: Monday, May 24, 2010 1:30 PM
>>>> To: <blindparenting at googlegroups.com>; <blv-moms at googlegroups.com>;
>>>> <singleblindparents at googlegroups.com>; "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing 
>>>> List"
>>
>>>> <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>>>> Subject: [blparent] need urgent help
>>>>
>>>>> Hey y'all,
>>>>> I have a friend who very recently gave birth. Her and her partner are
>>>>> both blind. They are having problems with cps. I don't want to go into
>>>>> all of the details, but she is being told one thing by the social 
>>>>> worker
>>>>> and the social worker is telling her family other things. They are 
>>>>> saying
>>
>>>>> that unless they have 24/7 help, their child will be released into
>>>>> protective custody. Do they have this right? What rights do the 
>>>>> parents
>>>>> have? They are first time parents and not sure what to do. They just 
>>>>> want
>>
>>>>> their baby home with them.
>>>>> Any help will be greatly appreciated.
>>>>> pipi
>>>>>
>>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>>> blparent mailing list
>>>>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>>>>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>>>>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>>>>> blparent:
>>>>>
>>>http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/poetlori8%40msn.co
>>>m
>>>>>
>>>>
>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>> blparent mailing list
>>>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>>>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>>>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>>>> blparent:
>>>>
>>>http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/tcl189%40rogers.co
>>>m
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>>_______________________________________________
>>>blparent mailing list
>>>blparent at nfbnet.org
>>>http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>>>To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for 
>>>blparent:
>>>http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/steve.jacobson%40visi.com
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for 
>> blparent:
>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/shrnhow%40att.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for 
> blparent:
> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/elizabethcooks%40comcast.net 





More information about the BlParent mailing list