[blparent] need urgent help

Pipi blahblahblah0822 at gmail.com
Wed May 26 17:57:08 UTC 2010 

I just wanted to write and say thank you for everyone who has given support 
and resources. I have passed everything on to the parents and I will 
continue to be in contact with them now and when they get their baby home 
with them. I don't want to sound rude in my saying this, so please don't 
take it that way at all. Since this isn't happening to me personally, I 
don't feel it is my place to give out more information than what I have. If 
and when the parents tell me things that I can share, I definitely will do 
so.
I'm not much for words or saying things correctly. While it is true we don't 
know the full story and aren't their, I have strong beliefs that this family 
is being discriminated against. They are good people who want the chance to 
be great parents. I feel in my heart that they will do an amazing job.
Again, thank you everyone. Hopefully I'll be able to share good news with 
y'all soon.
Pipi
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Steve Jacobson" <steve.jacobson at visi.com>
To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Wednesday, May 26, 2010 9:13 AM
Subject: Re: [blparent] need urgent help


> While it is true that we don't know the details of this entire case, it 
> would be wrong in my experience to assume that the hospital social worker 
> or CPS were acting
> with reason.  There have been too many situations such as Elizabeth 
> describes below.  Certainly there are blind persons who find themselves as 
> parents without
> being prepared, too, but frankly, this happens to sighted people too and 
> the answer is not just to remove the child.  We don't have the details of 
> where this is
> happening, but again, I hope the person who originally wrote about this 
> will keep in contact with these parents and find someone in her area who 
> might be able to
> help.  The president of the NFB affilliate in that state can probably 
> help.
>
> Best regards,
>
> Steve Jacobson
>
> On Wed, 26 May 2010 01:19:12 -0600, Elizabeth Cooks wrote:
>
>>sommebody was wondering how I was sure this case was on the up and up. 
>>It's
>>becausemy husband nearly had the same thing happen to us when Angelica was
>>born.  I later found out that it was the OBGYN, who, by the way, had the
>>bedside manner of a moose, that reported us.  Luckily, the CPS worker who
>>came to see me and i knew each other and he knew what questions to ask, 
>>and
>>he essentially told the social worker and the hospital staff to go away 
>>and
>>leave me alone.  I told the hospital social worker that said person could
>>ask any questions they ahd.  Instead, on the day i go home, said person
>>prodeeds to tell me how to place my newborn baby when she is lying down, 
>>as
>>I had never been a parent before when he knew I had.  What was the report?
>>He didn't know if I could clean the baby proppery when she was messy, and
>>how would I know how to support her head when holding her?  What an idiot!
>>Very semilar things.  I am sure that if I had gotten an uneducated
>>overzealous worker instead of someone i knew, something semilar would have
>>happened.  Just as an aside, I knew this person from church and not from 
>>any
>>previous encounter with CPS.
>>----- Original Message ----- 
>>From: "sharon howerton" <shrnhow at att.net>
>>To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>>Sent: Tuesday, May 25, 2010 6:24 PM
>>Subject: Re: [blparent] need urgent help
>
>
>>>I teach our Parenting series at Hadley. There are three
>>>courses--Preparation, Infancy and Early Years. I have had students who 
>>>took
>>>one or all of the courses just to be knowledgeable and to show any 
>>>agency,
>>>if one did get involved, that they were making an effort to educate
>>>themselves. Our school is here for those who want or need it, and the
>>>courses are free, but one is required to prepare and submit assignments. 
>>>I
>>>would welcome any questions on or off list. I've taught these courses for
>>>perhaps 5 years now. I am a blind parent with two adult sighted sons.
>>> Sharon Howerton
>>> shrnhow at att.net
>>> ----- Original Message ----- 
>>> From: "Steve Jacobson" <steve.jacobson at visi.com>
>>> To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>>> Sent: Tuesday, May 25, 2010 1:35 PM
>>> Subject: Re: [blparent] need urgent help
>>>
>>>
>>>> What probably happened is that a hospital social worker called Child
>>>> Protection.  While this doesn't happen all the time, it happens more 
>>>> than
>>>> it should.  For starters,
>>>> the couple needs to present a reasonable case to whatever social worker
>>>> they meet with.  While they certainly have rights, it is difficult to
>>>> have to fight this out in the
>>>> courts at this point so it is better to do what can be done to avoid
>>>> that. It wouldn't hurt for everyone in question to know that the new
>>>> parents feel strongly enough to
>>>> challeng in court if necessary, though.  They need to be ready to 
>>>> answer
>>>> questions about how they would handle the various functions of 
>>>> parenting,
>>>> and if this is
>>>> their first, it would be good for them to work with another blind 
>>>> parent.
>>>> In fact, asking that another blind parent be with them when they talk 
>>>> to
>>>> the social worker
>>>> would be good.  The social worker may not even be aware that there are
>>>> blind parents who raise sighted kids.
>>>>
>>>> On the other hand, if the parents are having their first child and have
>>>> not given much thought to various aspects of parenting, they need to 
>>>> get
>>>> answers and figure
>>>> things out in a hurry.  Whether it is right or wrong, new parents who
>>>> appear not to know what they are getting into will have more problems
>>>> than those who can say
>>>> they know how to change a diaper, feed a child, detect diaper rash, 
>>>> check
>>>> the baby's temperature and so on.  The social worker is going to close
>>>> his or her eyes
>>>> and think about what he or she could do as a parent and we know this is 
>>>> a
>>>> poor way to draw conclusions, but it isw how some form their opinions.
>>>>
>>>> This kind of thing can be very serious, so do what you can to help them
>>>> out or get them in contact with others who can help.
>>>>
>>>> Best regards,
>>>>
>>>> Steve Jacobson
>>>>
>>>> On Tue, 25 May 2010 11:31:01 -0500, Robert Shelton wrote:
>>>>
>>>>>Is it remotely possible that the other members of the family have an
>>>>>agenda?
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>>"A strong nation, like a strong person, can afford to be gentle, firm,
>>>>>thoughtful, and restrained. It can afford to extend a helping hand to
>>>>>others. It is a weak nation, like a weak person, that must behave with
>>>>>bluster and boasting and rashness and other signs of insecurity."
>>>>>--Jimmy Carter
>>>>
>>>>>-----Original Message-----
>>>>>From: Tammy, Paul and Colyn [mailto:tcl189 at rogers.com]
>>>>>Sent: Monday, May 24, 2010 7:14 PM
>>>>>To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
>>>>>Subject: Re: [blparent] need urgent help
>>>>
>>>>>Hi,
>>>>
>>>>>And, cps should not be talking to these parent's family about anything,
>>>>>it's
>>>>
>>>>>a breach of confidence especially when apparently the family is being
>>>>>told
>>>>>different things by cps.
>>>>
>>>>>Tammy
>>>>>----- Original Message ----- 
>>>>>From: "Barbara Hammel" <poetlori8 at msn.com>
>>>>>To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>>>>>Sent: Monday, May 24, 2010 3:51 PM
>>>>>Subject: Re: [blparent] need urgent help
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>>>I may be wrong but I don't think CPS normally works to take children
>>>>>>away
>>>>>>if there is no history.  In other words, they usually are reactive not
>>>>>>proactive.  If they're being pro-active, it probably is--as someone
>>>>>>said--an overzealous worker.  If the family and the blind child do not
>>>>>>get
>>>>>>along, the family may be part of this problem, too.
>>>>>> But whatever the circumstances, the parents have not proved 
>>>>>> themselves
>>>>>> unfit parents so CPS has no right to remove the baby.
>>>>>> Many sighted parents have been lousy parents and kept their kids, 
>>>>>> these
>>>>>> people are just acting on their fears.  If they can't talk rationally
>>>>>> with
>>>>
>>>>>> the social worker, maybe another blind person who knows them could be
>>>>>> at
>>>>>> an arranged meeting.  The contacts that have been given in other
>>>>>> messages
>>>>>> should definitely be used.  Fear motivates people to do irrational
>>>>>> things.
>>>>>> Barbara
>>>>>>
>>>>>> ...
>>>>>> Yesterday is
>>>>>> A path well-trod,
>>>>>> A familiar lane
>>>>>> Through sacred sod,
>>>>>> A road we travel
>>>>>> Too often, I fear,
>>>>>> For there are the good times
>>>>>> When things are hard here,
>>>>>> ...
>>>>>>
>>>>>> --------------------------------------------------
>>>>>> From: "Pipi" <blahblahblah0822 at gmail.com>
>>>>>> Sent: Monday, May 24, 2010 1:30 PM
>>>>>> To: <blindparenting at googlegroups.com>; <blv-moms at googlegroups.com>;
>>>>>> <singleblindparents at googlegroups.com>; "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing
>>>>>> List"
>>>>
>>>>>> <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>>>>>> Subject: [blparent] need urgent help
>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Hey y'all,
>>>>>>> I have a friend who very recently gave birth. Her and her partner 
>>>>>>> are
>>>>>>> both blind. They are having problems with cps. I don't want to go 
>>>>>>> into
>>>>>>> all of the details, but she is being told one thing by the social
>>>>>>> worker
>>>>>>> and the social worker is telling her family other things. They are
>>>>>>> saying
>>>>
>>>>>>> that unless they have 24/7 help, their child will be released into
>>>>>>> protective custody. Do they have this right? What rights do the
>>>>>>> parents
>>>>>>> have? They are first time parents and not sure what to do. They just
>>>>>>> want
>>>>
>>>>>>> their baby home with them.
>>>>>>> Any help will be greatly appreciated.
>>>>>>> pipi
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>>>>> blparent mailing list
>>>>>>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>>>>>>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>>>>>>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info 
>>>>>>> for
>>>>>>> blparent:
>>>>>>>
>>>>>http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/poetlori8%40msn.co
>>>>>m
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>>>> blparent mailing list
>>>>>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>>>>>> http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>>>>>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>>>>>> blparent:
>>>>>>
>>>>>http://www.nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/tcl189%40rogers.co
>>>>>m
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>>_______________________________________________
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>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
>>>> _______________________________________________
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>>>
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>
>
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